Alter a Word & Define

[Guest thrasher]

Take any word from the Dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting,

 

or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this

 

year's winners:

 

1. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding

 

stupid people that stops bright ideas from

 

penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately,

 

shows little sign of breaking down in the

 

near future.

 

2. Foreploy (v): Any misrepresentation about

 

yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

 

3. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a

 

house, which renders the subject financially

 

impotent for an indefinite period.

 

4. Giraffiti (n): Vandalism spray-painted

 

very, very high.

 

5. Sarchasm (n): The gulf between the author

 

of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't

 

get it.

 

6. Inoculatte (v): To take coffee intravenously

 

when you are running late.

 

7. Hipatitis (n): Terminal coolness.

 

8. Osteopornosis (n): A degenerate disease.

 

(This one got extra credit.)

 

9. Karmageddon (n): It's like, when everybody

 

Is sending off all these really bad vibes,

 

Right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and

 

it's like, a serious bummer.

 

10. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of

 

Getting through the day consuming only things

 

that are good for you.

 

11. Glibido (v): All talk and no action.

 

12. Dopeler effect (n): The tendency of stupid

 

ideas to seem smarter when they come at you

 

rapidly

 

13. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance

 

performed just after you've accidentally

 

walked through a spider web.

 

14. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a

 

mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three

 

in the morning and cannot be cast out.

 

15. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after

 

finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

 

16. Ignoranus (n): A person who's both stupid

 

and an asshole