nomadpete Posted January 24, 2012 Posted January 24, 2012 A Pastor goes to the dentist for a set of false teeth. The first Sunday after he gets his new teeth, he talks for only eight minutes. The second Sunday, he talks for only ten minutes. The following Sunday, he talks for 2 hours and 48 minutes. The congregation had to mob him to get him down from the pulpit and they asked him what happened. The Pastor explains the first Sunday his gums hurt so bad he couldn't talk for more than 8 minutes. The second Sunday his gums hurt too much to talk for more than 10 minutes. But, the third Sunday, he put his wife's teeth in by mistake and he couldn't shut up... ((I KNOW you are smiling .....)) 3
Studentbiggles Posted January 24, 2012 Posted January 24, 2012 ............................................................So where's your Blonde Jokes nomadpete ...............or should I say "Grey" ones!
bull Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Wife says to husband,I want 5 grand,he says what for? She says a tit job...Husband thinks for a while than tosses her a roll of dunny paper and says,rub that between your tits for a couple of years. Hows that gunna work?she says,,,Hubby looks over at her and says,,,,,Worked for your arse did,nt it................................... 1
pudestcon Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Wife says to husband,I want 5 grand,he says what for? She says a tit job...Husband thinks for a while than tosses her a roll of dunny paper and says,rub that between your tits for a couple of years. Hows that gunna work?she says,,,Hubby looks over at her and says,,,,,Worked for your **** did,nt it................................... And that's when the fight started!! 1
Guest Maj Millard Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 Husband can be visited in ward 3 bed 14. If not there he may be away undergoing more major surgery
bull Posted January 25, 2012 Posted January 25, 2012 :stirrer:Hes suffering breathing problems,,,,she sat on him!!!!!!!! crushed lung broken ribs ruptured spleen. his wife was mortified so booked herself into jenny craig rehab center--------The manager of the clinic called all staff to a meeting,now this case is unlike any we have had before when she arrives ,paul you drive the forklift and glen hurry up getting that wall down so we can get her inside...................... 1
pudestcon Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 :stirrer:Hes suffering breathing problems,,,,she sat on him!!!!!!!! crushed lung broken ribs ruptured spleen. his wife was mortified so booked herself into jenny craig rehab center--------The manager of the clinic called all staff to a meeting,now this case is unlike any we have had before when she arrives ,paul you drive the forklift and glen hurry up getting that wall down so we can get her inside...................... MORE fights about to start!!! Pud 1
dazza 38 Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 :stirrer:Hes suffering breathing problems,,,,she sat on him!!!!!!!! crushed lung broken ribs ruptured spleen. his wife was mortified so booked herself into jenny craig rehab center--------The manager of the clinic called all staff to a meeting,now this case is unlike any we have had before when she arrives ,paul you drive the forklift and glen hurry up getting that wall down so we can get her inside...................... The ambulance/Tip truck.She is way to big to let loose.We are sending her to the biggest looser TV show. 1
Guest Maj Millard Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 I'm not getting involved in this one !!!!..........................................Marj....
dazza 38 Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 The ambulance/Tip truck.She is way to big to let loose.We are sending her to the biggest looser TV show. She is going great guns, only killed one host by falling on them.She has gone from 170Kg to 150kg. That is alot of weight to lose in 2 weeks.She is looking forward to looking in the mirror and seeing her ..............? 1
bull Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 The show did great guns highest ratings for a decade,but by this time hubby was out of hospital ,he straight away went charging down to........................ 1
dazza 38 Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 local gun shop to stock up on ammuniton, he was worried that his fat missus would get out of hospital and ............. 1
Studentbiggles Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 Guys ......Yes thats you Dazza, Minnie Minor Marj + Co......this thread has taken on a "Never Ending Story Theme" :roflmao:Be careful boys, there might be a few "WOP's" + "POP's" out there that fit this treads discription .......................... Now those acrymnoms above have got you all thinking won't find them on the CASA web site ......................Alley 1
bull Posted January 26, 2012 Posted January 26, 2012 A swelte sexy alluring lady ,and had to fend off those tv blokes before they...............
Ben Longden Posted January 28, 2012 Posted January 28, 2012 So she came home, and decided to sit around the house. Thats when she realised she was so fat she sat AROUND the house....
nomadpete Posted February 13, 2012 Author Posted February 13, 2012 OMG What have I started? In order to balance things we must now post an equal number of threads that pay out on each and every other segment of the population. AND you will all have to attend the "Politically Correct" training module or else we'll start getting law suits. Time to start a new thread ........... But if it's clean AND politically correct, I don't think it belongs in the Laughter Forum. Dear Administrator, Please provide us with a new froum. Call it "Politically Correct Humour" - and put a counter on it so we can all see whether anybody bothers to read politically correct attempts at humour.
bull Posted February 14, 2012 Posted February 14, 2012 Well our fearless leader [whats her name ]just showed how they dont plan things to happen the way they want it [snigger snigger]re,stabbing kevin in the back.
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