Men's rules

[Old Koreelah]

The Mans Rules

 

At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down

 

Finally, the guys' side of the story.

 

( I must admit, it's pretty good.)

 

We always hear 'the rules'

 

From the female side

 

Now here are the rules from the male side.

 

These are our rules!

 

Please note.. these are all numbered '1 '

 

ON PURPOSE!

 

1. Men are NOT mind readers..

 

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.

 

You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.

 

We need it up, you need it down.

 

You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

 

1. Crying is blackmail.

 

1. Ask for what you want..

 

Let us be clear on this one:

 

Subtle hints do not work!

 

Strong hints do not work!

 

Obvious hints do not work!

 

Just say it!

 

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question..

 

1.. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.

 

Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for..

 

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

 

In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

 

1..... If you already think you're fat,

 

then Don't ask us.

 

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

 

1. You can either ask us to do something

 

or tell us how you want it done.

 

Not both.

 

If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

 

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

 

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we..

 

1. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings.

 

Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

 

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.

 

We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

 

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

 

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine... Really.

 

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Football, Rugby, Cricket or motor sports and even Wood carving.

 

1. You have enough clothes.

 

1 .. You have too many shoes.

 

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

 

1. Thank you for reading this.

 

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight...

 

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

 

Pass this to as many men as you can -

 

to give them a laugh... .....

 

Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh.

 

--

 

 

[facthunter]

Too logical to work. it's not a bad one though. Womens brains and mens brains work differently. Just accept that only men make mistakes but sometimes they realise that marrying YOU was a mistake that THEY made, and then YOU are for it. Nev

 

 

[Yenn]

Marrying.

 

Men get married hoping she will always be the same. Women get married knowing they are going to change you.

 

 

[Mick]

Please note that all these rules are numbered 1. This is deliberate because rule #1 is whichever is most applicable at the time!

 

 

[facthunter]

As they enter the church, it's there. aisle altar hymn. .. Nev