Funny's

[Robbo]

Oh friends you have to look at these videos

 

My favorite....... http://www.military.com/video/off-duty/humor/humor-arrest-me/1702907474001/

 

Bloke in the car nearly rams into the car in front!!!

 

Funny videos at http://www.military.com/video/off-duty/humor/

 

Trust me, don't be drinking when you watch this or it will end up on the screen like what just happened to me!!

 

 

[red750]

Here;s one for you, Robbo.

 

A marine serving in Afghanistan receives a letter from his girlfriend in the States. She tells him she has slept with two men while he has been away, and doesn't wish to see him any more. She asks him to return her photo. The marine goes around the camp asking his buddies for any unwanted photos of girls. He collects about twenty, some clothed, some undressed. He mails them home to her, saying he can't remember her, to take her photo out of the collection, and return the rest to him. Karma.

 

.

 

 

[Robbo]

Good Golly...................

 

I like.............. :)

 

 

[Guest aviatrix27]

sounds like an old episode of MASH :)

 

 

[Robbo]

I am sick of seeing that show on repeat, Must have been a good show cause they keep repeating it in the arvo...

 

 

[mnewbery]

Cheaper royalties

 

 

[siznaudin]

B

 

I am sick of seeing that show on repeat, Must have been a good show cause they keep repeating it in the arvo...

Bring back Hiram Holiday, I say...

(Hiram who?)

 

 

[Robbo]

Didn't that have Wally Cox in it? Think it only went for 5 months before being canned.

 

 

[siznaudin]

Whoops - misspelt it ... Hiram HoLLiday.

 

Yes, Wally Cox, but it ran for a couple of years at least.

 

I saw it on the small B&W screen back in the mid to late 60's. I loved it.

 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0048839/

 

 

[Robbo]

Whoops - misspelt it ... Hiram HoLLiday.Yes, Wally Cox, but it ran for a couple of years at least.

I saw it on the small B&W screen back in the mid to late 60's. I loved it.

 

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0048839/

according to that imdb listing it only went for a year?

 

 

[red750]

The Wimpiest Dad

 

Two kids are arguing over whose father is the wimpiest.

 

The first one says, "My dad is so scared of lightning that when it strikes, he slides underneath our bed."

 

 

 

The second kid says, "That's nothing. My dad is so scared of the dark that when my mother works night shift, he sleeps with the woman next door."

 

 

[Robbo]

Gold !

 

 

[siznaudin]

One L in holiday, two L's in Wally. And twenty episodes, whatever that translates to...maybe two calendar years ? :confused:

 

It would have been around '66 that it was showing in Oz? It's such a very looong time ago.

 

“The Adventures of Hiram Holliday” was a half-hour filmed comedy/adventure series which ran for 20 episodes on the NBC Television Network (from 1956 to 1957). The TV series was based on a novel by Paul Gallico named “Adventures of Hiram Holliday” (1939). The series -- similar to the book -- focused on the adventures of a newspaper proofreader, who, through years of secret practice, has gained James Bond-like skills in many forms of physical combat, shooting, and in activities as diverse as rock-climbing and scuba-diving. Hiram Holliday was played by Wally Cox…"

 

 

[red750]

A man staggered into a hospital with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes, and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat.

 

Naturally, the Doctor asked him, 'What happened to YOU?'

 

'Well, I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife, when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our golf balls into a field of cattle .

 

We went to look for them and while I was looking around I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end.'

 

'I walked over, lifted its tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it - stuck right in the middle of the cow's bottom.

 

Still holding the cow's tail up, I yelled to my wife, 'Hey, this looks like yours!''

 

'I don't remember much after that'

 

 

[red750]

Two mates were sitting on the river bank fishing. One turned to the other and said, "I'm thinking of getting a divorce. My wife hasn't spoken to me in 2 months."

 

"Don't be too hasty." said his mate. "Women like that are hard to find."

 

.

 

 

[red750]

Received this today, and had to share it. Apologies if you find it a bit offensive, Kaye.

 

NAG NAG NAG!!!

 

An attorney arrived home late, after a very tough day trying to get a stay of execution. His last minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed.

 

 

 

As soon as he walked through the door at home, his wife started on him about, 'What time of night to be getting home is this? Where have you been? Dinner is cold and I'm not reheating it'. And on and on and on.

 

 

 

Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he poured himself a shot of whiskey and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub, pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks as he dragged himself up the stairs.

 

 

 

While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client, James Wright, had been granted a stay of execution after all. Wright would not be hanged tonight.

 

 

 

Finally realizing what a terrible day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs and give him the good news..

 

 

 

As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband, bent over naked, drying his legs and feet.

 

 

 

'They're not hanging Wright tonight,' she said.

 

He whirled around and screamed, 'FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WOMAN, DON'T YOU EVER STOP?!'

 

Peter

 

 

[red750]

Watch this video, it's a classic.

 

http://dotsub.com/view/6c5d7514-5656-476a-9504-07dd4e2f6509

 

.

 

 

[red750]

A young man with his pants hanging half off his ass,

 

two gold front teeth, and a half inch thick gold chain

 

around his neck; walked into the

 

local welfare office to pick up his cheque.

 

He marched up to the counter and said,

 

"Hi. You know, I just H A T E drawing

 

welfare. I'd really rather have a job.. I don't like

 

taking advantage of the system, getting

 

something for nothing."

 

The social worker behind the counter said "Your

 

timing is excellent. We Just got a job opening from a

 

very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and

 

bodyguard for his beautiful daughter. You'll have

 

to drive around in his 2012 Mercedes-Benz CL, and

 

he will supply all of your clothes."

 

"Because of The long hours, meals will be provided.

 

You'll also be expected to escort the daughter on her

 

overseas holiday trips. This is rather awkward to say

 

But you will also have, as part of your job, the

 

assignment to satisfy her sexual urges as the

 

daughter is in her mid-20's and has a rather strong

 

sex drive."

 

The guy, just plain wide-eyed, said,

 

"You're bullshittin' me!"

 

The social worker said, "Yeah, well...

 

You started it." .....

 

.

 

 

[Guest aviatrix27]

an oldie, but a goodie :)