More cheap One - Liners. . . .

[Phil Perry]

> Just had my water bill of $375 drop on my mat. That's a lot.. . . . .The Oxfam charity can

 

> supply a whole African village for just $5 a month: time to change supplier

 

> I think.

 

> Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Paralympics after they

 

> tested positive for WD40.

 

>

 

> ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"

 

> And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai

 

> Brothel!!!

 

>> Two Indian junkies accidentally snorted curry powder instead of cocaine.

 

> Both in hospital...one's in a korma.. The other's got a dodgy tikka!

 

>

 

> In the first few days of the Olympics the Romanians took Gold, Silver,

 

> Bronze, Copper & Lead.

 

>

 

> Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast, they

 

> can now photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

 

>>

 

> A boy asks his granny, 'Have you seen my pills, they were labelled LSD?'

 

> Granny replies, blow the pills, have you seen them bloody purple and green dragons in the kitchen?!

 

>

 

> Wife gets naked and asks hubby, 'What turns you on more, my pretty face or

 

> my sexy body?'

 

> Hubby looks her up and down and replies,. . . . . . . . . 'Your sense of humour!

 

> My mate just hired an Eastern European lady as a cleaner. . . cleaner, took her 15 hours to hoover

 

> the house. Turns out she was a . . . . . . . Slovak.

 

>

 

> > I've been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest

 

> I only intended to rough him up a bit.

 

>

 

> > Did you hear about the fat, alcoholic transvestite - All he wanted to do was

 

> eat, drink and be Mary.

 

 

[bexrbetter]

> ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"

> And with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai

 

> Brothel!!!

Was traveling on a bus in Thailand when this smoking hot drop dead gorgeous bird hops on and sits down right up against me.

 

I started to concentrate; "Don't get an erection, don't get an erection ...."

 

Too late, she did.