Mother-in- law cure.

[planedriver]

I used to have a lot of trouble with my mother-in law, so decided to pay for her to go on a short holiday, in order that we could get a little peace. Explaining my predicament to the airline reservasion clerk, he said "I fully understand sir, leave it me, i'll organise the best seat for this special occasion".[ATTACH]3330.vB[/ATTACH]

 

What a kind understanding guy he was. I have'nt had a problem since.

 

Name of booking agency supplied, on receipt of a case of beer.

 

 

 

[Admin]

DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME but I believe there is a plant who's common name is "Mother-In-Law's Tongue" and if you took some of the sap and placed it in her cup of tea ;) she woul lose her voice for a while - so I am told!

 

 

[Yenn]

I took my mother in law to new Zealand for a holiday.

 

Half way there she said she didn't want to go.

 

I told her to shut up and keep swimming!

 

 

[planedriver]

Too late for that Ian, sadly:crying: she slipped away;)

 

 

[planedriver]

What sort of mate are you??????????

 

You could have taken mine too.

 

 

[Ben Longden]

Pick a number and get in line!!!!

 

:devil:

 

Ben

 

 

[Guest danda]

I'm not sure who that would scare the most 3 days of seeing that and I would push her out the door

 

 

[planedriver]

How rude are you Danda? ha ha!

 

I posted the nicest picture of the mother-in law I could find, before she lost her grip on the windscreen.

 

RIP

 

 

[w3stie]

One christmas, years ago, we bought our two young sons walkie-talkie headsets. They were headsets with a microphone attached, so you could just walk around and chat to the other party. The in-laws came over for christmas lunch as usual, and I was outside with the headsets on. A voice came on saying "hello, hello do you read me?" I recognised my wife's voice (I thought), and said in my best professional way "Hello, I'd like to get into your knickers, over."

 

The other party then disconnected abruptly, just as I walked around the corner of our house and saw my wife hanging up the washing, sans headphones.

 

You know that hot prickly feeling you get on your neck when you've done something really stupid? I got that in my whole body. I grabbed her and said, "Tell me you were just talking to me on the headphones". She said no!

 

I had been talking to my mother-in-law.

 

Nothing was ever said.

 

True story.

 

 

[Ben Longden]

THATS one way to fix the dreaded MiL problem......

 

Ben

 

 

[facthunter]

Mother-in Law.

 

The best thing about your mother-in -law is that she gives you a preview of what your wife will be like eventually. Now THAT could be really serious. N...

 

 

[Admin]

I have a funny story Nev...

 

I met Corrine at work here in Aus and yes it WAS a work romance. I was poached to go over to NZ to sell off the Public Transport System in Auckland - The Yellow Bus Company and with Corrine being a Kiwi I thought that would be ok, 6 months over there, Corrine would get "Home" out of her system and we could return to Aus and live happily ever after ;)

 

By this time I was hooked and just before we left Corrine showed me pictures of her family - this brother is a council worker, this brother is a truck driver and this brother...OH MY GOD..the picture she showed me was this dirty looking evil character with a black beard, leathers, tatts and built like a brick s**t house...what am I getting myself into here I thought...I asked with a quaking voice "and dear, what does he do" to which she replied...."he sells Tuppaware" - true and fair dinkum...he does or did then.

 

just before we left for NZ Corrine's mother came over making a surprise visit - it was the first time I had ever met her and all I can say is "If I only had known" - I am sure she came over just to check me out before we lobbed on her doorstep.

 

 

[planedriver]

Hi Ian.

 

I'll swap my in-law for yours. I need some new Tuppaware!!! and I reckon that would be a great trade-off.

 

The photo of my mother-in-law hanging off the windsreen during take-off is even more exciting than when Cathy Kirby won Gold.;) YEE Haaaaa

 

Alan

 

 

[planedriver]

Hi Facthunter

 

When the mother-in-law said she never wanted to speak to me again, I simply replied "who am I, that would even want to go against your wishes"

 

Before she could repy, I took the battery out of my hearing aid and handed it to her.

 

My "sweetheart" is nothing like her mother (Thank God). She's very placid, just like the old milkman. Funny that!!

 

Alan

 

Alan

 

 

[facthunter]

Mother-in -law.

 

Planedriver,

 

With wit like yours, as they say, you should be on the stage. ( You know the rest ).. Actually , I am tongue in cheek with this, as the exception to the rule I got on very well with BOTH my mothers-in- law. Nev

 

 

[planedriver]

Facthunter.

 

I'm so relieved to hear that you get on well with your mother-in-laws. As we are all "mates???" on this forum, i've arranged to take my mother-in law to The Oaks this weekend where we can do a swap. Don't you dare let me down now, or, i'll tell Ian who being an understanding guy, will i'm sure, bar you from this site!! Permanantly.

 

Regards

 

Alan

 

 

[slartibartfast]

I've been very lucky with my mothers-in-law.

 

I got on well with the first.

 

Got denied entry to the country and deported when trying to meet the second.

 

The third was dead before I got here - honest.

 

 

[planedriver]

Startiblast,

 

I've got some rather sad news to break to you.

 

My first mother-in-law sadly died, because she ate poisened mushrooms:crying:.

 

Sadly, and as strange as it may seem, my second mother died, because she ate poisened mushrooms too:crying:.

 

The third mother-in-law died of a broken neck, because she refused to eat the mushrooms;)

 

Is that what they call a "hat trick" or what?