Air Navigation Problems

[Guest john]

A attractive women in a hot air balloon, realized she was lost while following the coastline over water. She lowered her altitude & spotted a man in a boat. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me, I promised a male friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am".

 

The man in the boat consulted his GPS & replied: "You're in a hot air balloon about 50 feet above the ground at the same elevation above sea level, & your geographical position is latitude 31.97 south, & longitude 149.09 west."

 

She rolled her eyes & said: "You must be a liberal coalition supporter".

 

The man responded: "I am, how did you know"?

 

Well answered the balloonist: "Everything you told me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, & I'm still lost, frankly you've not been much help to me".

 

The boat man smiled & replied: "You must be a labour supporter".

 

The female balloonist then said: " How did you know"?

 

Well the man said: "You don't know where you are, or where you are going, you've risen to where you are now, due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, & you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position, you were before we met, but somehow now its my fault.

 

 

[bexrbetter]

Yuh, the Engineer (on the ground) and the Management (in the balloon) joke .....

 

 

[Marty_d]

Yuh, the Engineer (on the ground) and the Management (in the balloon) joke .....

Plus, he got the political parties reversed.

 

 

[Gnarly Gnu]

Plus, he got the political parties reversed.

Yes, quite so. This is Labors balloon:

 

 

Reality is way funnier than any parody could be with this mob. Presumably the many breasts represent feeding the legion of welfare suckers, illegal immigrants and enviro-spivs that accompany them.

 

 

[Marty_d]

Ah Gnu, you're a funny bugger. Good job you were being ironic, I'd hate to think it was possible that anyone could possibly believe that.

 

Talking of the balloon, I'm sure I saw her in one of Adelaide's dodgier strip clubs. Can't be sure, I had a few drinks on board.

 

 

[kaz3g]

Yes, quite so. This is Labors balloon:

 

Reality is way funnier than any parody could be with this mob. Presumably the many breasts represent feeding the legion of welfare suckers, illegal immigrants and enviro-spivs that accompany them.

I thought it was Tony and the Liberal Party bringing their latest multi-billion dollar dose of succour to wealthy new mum supporters.

 

Kaz

 

 

[Gnarly Gnu]

Talking of the balloon, I'm sure I saw her in one of Adelaide's dodgier strip clubs. Can't be sure, I had a few drinks on board.

A night out with Craig Thompson? He would remember for sure if it was her. But perhaps you were the one that kept stealing his phone and credit card? He needs Kaz's help to undo this grave injustice, such a nice Labor man that got framed.

 

 

[kaz3g]

A night out with Craig Thompson? He would remember for sure if it was her. But perhaps you were the one that kept stealing his phone and credit card? He needs Kaz's help to undo this grave injustice, such a nice Labor man that got framed.

Craig Thompson and Geoff Shaw (ALP and Lib respectively) are both examples of pariahs in politics or ought to be. Unfortunately, Geoff Shaw has apparently avoided the sort of scrutiny Thompson was rightly subjected to.

 

I guess those in NSW might be wondering this very minute which of the major parties is less corrupt? Both seem to have some doozies in them that's for sure.

 

In the end, we get the politicians we deserve because we are the ones who elect them. If enough of us took a stand and kept voting out the no- hopers instead of blindly following parties we might all be a lot better off.

 

Give me an honest-to-goodness crook every time!

 

Kaz

 

 

[Marty_d]

A night out with Craig Thompson? He would remember for sure if it was her. But perhaps you were the one that kept stealing his phone and credit card? He needs Kaz's help to undo this grave injustice, such a nice Labor man that got framed.

Nah, not having access to a work credit card, I could never afford to frequent the sort of establishments he did.

 

Kaz is right. Craig Thompson is a turd of the first order, but he's not Robinson Crusoe in that. How about Arthur Sinodinos, that highly respected Howard government minister and recent assistant Treasurer, who despite being a director of AWH and pulling down $200,000 for about 100 hours work, had no idea of the corruption and political payoffs? Thompson at least only ripped off about $25,000. Sinodinos stood to gain 20 million from dodgy deals. I guess his sin is less though, because he kept his pants on?

 

 

[Guernsey]

You guys have got no respect for udders.

 

Alan.

 

 

[spacesailor]

AND!.

 

We didn't elect the lier-Lier red head

 

spacesailor

 

 

[Gnarly Gnu]

Even doofus Shorten has started to figure out what Marty_d can't:

 

"BILL Shorten has attacked the governments of

 

[/url]Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard

 

, highlighting their flaws, mistakes and misjudgments, arguing that he has learned the lessons of Labor’s election defeat and declaring the party must accept them too."

 

 

...which of the major parties is less corrupt?

Yes on a more serious note - and in the spirit of both Easter and Anzac Day - all of us are sinners and all of us get to die as a result: Romans 5v12 "For this cause , even as by one man sin entered into the world, and by sin death; and thus death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned" So I'm voting only for the one without sin, the one that overcame the power of death.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[SDQDI]

C'mon people stop turning every second joke thread into a political argument if its in aviation laughter have a laugh and don't be so serious

 

 

[cscotthendry]

such a nice Labor man that got framed.

You mean framed as in Arthur sinodinos framed? Or Peter reith framed?

 

 

[Marty_d]

Even doofus Shorten has started to figure out what Marty_d can't:

 

"BILL Shorten has attacked the governments of

 

[/url]Kevin Rudd and Julia Gillard

 

, highlighting their flaws, mistakes and misjudgments, arguing that he has learned the lessons of Labor’s election defeat and declaring the party must accept them too."

 

Yes on a more serious note - and in the spirit of both Easter and Anzac Day - all of us are sinners and all of us get to die as a result: Romans 5v12 "For this cause , even as by one man sin entered into the world, and by sin death; and thus death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned" So I'm voting only for the one without sin, the one that overcame the power of death.

 

 

 

Thought you voted for Tony Abbott? How'd he get to be without sin and overcome the power of death?

 

 

 

Actually I understand why you vote Liberal... I think another bible verse says something like "To he that has, more shall be given, and to he that has not, even that that he has will be taken away"... which seems to be a concise summary of Liberal Party fiscal policy.

 

 

 

As to Shorten's attacks, every incoming opposition leader seeks to distance themselves from the previous leadership. Nothing new there. I think even the Mad Monk had some negative things to say about Little Johnny.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Marty_d]

C'mon people stop turning every second joke thread into a political argument if its in aviation laughter have a laugh and don't be so serious

I agree... but this one DID start out as a political joke (kind of). Trust me, I laugh at Gnu's posts.

 

 

[Gnarly Gnu]

Yeah, they're shady characters too but they are boring and lack the sheer brazenness and lying creativity of your friend Thomson who is quite amusing actually.

 

 

 

[M61A1]

I have occasionally wondered (I rarely contemplate ballooning), how do you navigate a balloon? It's not like you actually have any control over where it goes, except the up and down bit, and that's a bit optimistic calling it control.

 

 

[Marty_d]

I have occasionally wondered (I rarely contemplate ballooning), how do you navigate a balloon? It's not like you actually have any control over where it goes, except the up and down bit, and that's a bit optimistic calling it control.

Wind direction at various altitudes? I don't think they'd have any control for direction, but they'd have to have a fair idea of prevailing winds and plot their general course accordingly. That, and make sure your planned direction of travel has plenty of open land...

 

 

[Old Koreelah]

I had a champaign balloon flight over the Brisbane Expo site in '88. We set off from a tiny urban park and landed in the yard of Humes Concrete. Pretty impressive what a good pilot can do with only vertical controls.

 

 

[Gnarly Gnu]

Dunno about his party but THIS is the sort of politician I like:

 

 

 

[Marty_d]

Dunno about his party but THIS is the sort of politician I like:

 

Republican of course - I can see that he would appeal to the lunatic fringe. Probably thinks that Sandy Hook and the two army base massacres don't show the need for banning automatic and semi-automatic weapons. Even Little Johnny had the balls to do that, about the only good thing he did.