Australian Ventriloquist . . .

[Phil Perry]

An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks into a Small village and sees a

 

local sitting on his verandah patting his dog.

 

He decides to have a little fun, so he says to the Kiwi . . .

 

'G'day mate, . . . mind if I talk to your dog?'r

 

Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

 

Dog: 'Yeah, . . . doin' all right.'

 

Kiwi: (look of extreme shock)

 

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Kiwi)

 

Dog: 'Yep'

 

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

 

Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

 

Kiwi: (look of utter disbelief)

 

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

 

Kiwi: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either...I think.'

 

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

 

Horse: 'Cool'

 

Kiwi: (absolutely dumbfounded)

 

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)

 

Horse: 'Yep'

 

Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

 

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, Brushes me down

 

often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the Elements.'

 

Kiwi: (total look of amazement)

 

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

 

Kiwi: (in a panic )

 

>

 

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>

 

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'The sheep's a liar... ! !

 

>

 

 

[Old Koreelah]

...and so the war across the ditch resumes...

 

 

[Marty_d]

One of my favourites!