The Blonde and her Jaguar

[Phil Perry]

 

She drives the car perfectly well during the day,

 

but at night, the car just won't go at all.

 

After trying to drive the car at night for a

 

week (but without any luck), she furiously

 

calls the Jaguar dealer, and they send out a

 

technician to her.

 

The technician examines the car and finds

 

nothing wrong with it.

 

So he turns to the blonde and asks:

 

"Ma'am, are you sure you are using the

 

right gears?"

 

Full of anger, the blonde replies:

 

 

 

"You nut, you idiot, how on earth you could ask

 

such a question? I'm not stupid you know!

 

Of course I am using the right gears;

 

 

 

 

 

I use "D" during the day

 

and "N" at night."

 

 

[Birdseye]

A former work colleague many years ago told me a story that he swore was true. His wife was tasked to take the train up to Birmingham and bring back the boss' new Jag. Roads were much quieter in those days and she had a quick trip down. Too quick according to the boss. He checked over the car and found it a bit warm and a near empty fuel tank. The answer came out when she claimed not to have exceeded fifty the whole way home.

 

It transpired she had never driven a car with a rev counter before............

 

 

[Marty_d]

I remember many years ago one of the social workers I worked with drove a work car from Bridgewater to Hobart (about 25km) in first gear. She thought it was an automatic...