Travel Baggage-Why Solo Trips Are Better

[Guest Darren Masters]

Travelling with friends always promises to be non-stop social bliss, but I find that the sense of euphoria evaporates that first time you’re stuck waiting in the foyer of your hotel.

 

After 20 minutes of standing around twiddling your thumbs, desperate to get stuck into the excitement of the unfamiliar streets outside, the final member of your party arrives only to announce that they’ve forgotten their camera, and will have to go back upstairs.

 

Then as soon as they’ve returned, someone else realises they’ve forgotten their passport. Which leads the first person to announce they need to pop upstairs and get their sunglasses.

 

Honestly, I reckon I’ve spent more time touring the brochure rack in my hotel than I have actually visiting tourist destinations. And let me tell you, there are only so many times you can read the same crappy lobby pamphlets about the Musée du Bellybutton Lint or the Temple Of Everlasting Dullness before you ring Qantas and get on the first flight home.

 

Then there’s the collective indecisiveness, especially when you’re working out where to go for dinner. Of course, no-one ever makes a suggestion – that would be bossy. Instead, they turn up their noses at everyone else’s ideas, while professing their willingness to go “anywhere else, honestly.” Then, when a decision’s finally been made, whoever finally picked a random joint out of Lonely Planet will be made to feel personally responsible for every minor defect in food, service and even décor for the rest of the night.

 

The group vibe can also get a little annoying. I emerged from my room on one trip to Thailand to discover that my three male travelling companions had spent the past hour watching a gecko catching moths. Seriously. I inquired whether they’d like to watch a DVD before going to bed. No, the lizard was apparently more interesting than any Hollywood blockbuster. So, because I didn’t want to seem antisocial, I sat beside them and spent literally the next two hours watching the gecko. The boredom addled my brain so much that in no time, I was cheering Gordon, as we named him, as loudly as the others.

 

Holidaying in a mixed group has its own frustrations, too – chief among them what I like to call the shopping vortex. It’s scientifically impossible, apparently, for any woman to walk directly from A to B if between those points there also happens to be a clothes shop. Now, I have no problem when women announce they’re spending the entire day shopping, and leave us menfolk to our own devices. But when every single journey is constantly interrupted by lengthy detours to inspect crappy-looking imitations of handbags that looked hideous in the first place, I start to get annoyed.

 

In Thailand, that meant I was constantly left fuming on the pavement outside handbag shops, where an endless procession of infuriating hustlers tried to sell me fake watches, “Armuni” suits and, ahem, female companionship. Little knowing that, at that moment in time, the chances of me paying to spend time with a member of the Vuitton-purchasing sex was about as likely as me willingly going with a tuk-tuk driver to his “special gem sale”.

 

But the worst thing about travelling in a group with women is other men. I was in Japan recently with three female friends who proved to magnetically attract tipsy, forward salarymen. On one occasion, one of them made such an impression on a well-known Japanese punk rockstar that he invited her and the other women into a private room, and plied them all with a tray of tequilas. Rudely leaving me sitting on the outside twiddling my thumbs as I watched them through the glass. And then, when we left, I had the fun of being the only one who was sober.

 

The irony of it all, of course, was that I was the only one who actually knew who he was. Hell, I even had his CD, until I smashed it by way of revenge.

 

But I’ve discovered there is one thing worse than travelling with a group, and that’s travelling alone. Compared with the relentless loneliness of solo travelling, I’d choose even a 14-day gecko Olympiad as long as it was with other people. So I’m going to keep travelling with friends, even if I have to buy all the tequilas and fake handbags myself.

 

 

[Guest Glenn]

There goes the TAA trip to New Zealand then :rolleyes:

 

 

[Guest OzChris]

haha - good one Darren, a very entertaining read :]

 

 

[Guest Darren Masters]

Ha ha different when traveling with a bunch of fellow aviation enthusiasts. Chris, I did not write this one but it was my thoughts exactly. Hey, when I go to Vietnam in March (solo mind you) and have a few beers I will write you something just as entertaining. That's a promise

 

 

[Guest airsick]

Good read Darren and spot on in most cases. But travelling solo does suck. I have to do it for work and would much rather than some familiar company than wandering the streets alone. :frown: