Sloppy Air Radio Operators.

[kgwilson]

I have always used 123.45 as the chat channel. A bit of banter is good when ATC is not busy. Some years ago when returning from a family Christmas I called ATC to request entry to the zone. I knew the controller & replied "XYZ, 2 P.O.B. one D.O.G. a bottle of scotch & several unwanted christmas presents, overhead (reporting point) 3000 feet, request entry & landing instructions". Response was hysterical laughter followed by XYZ join straight in for 36, cleared to land, Merry Christmas.

 

 

[jackc]

That is why I don’t like flying when there are gliders in the air, they ar white, skinny and bloody near invisible and could be anywhere. Fortunately, being retired I am not restricted to weekend flying!

IF you hang out where gliders are operating from, then a Flarm transponder may be handy? You only get audible warning within 18 seconds of a collision, but it’s better than nothing!

 

Cheers,

 

Jack.

 

 

[Old Koreelah]

I find listening to Area Frequency quite instructive. As T88 says, too many calls are rapid-speak gobbledygook, but it's good practise to try to interpret what they're saying. The female controllers and pilots tend to be far easier to understand, but there's an aweful lot of non-standard G'days thrown in there.

 

 

[Phil Perry]

If you have read any of my posts you will know that or radio procedures are my favourite gripe!

I ALWAYS read your comments Derek !

 

 

[Phil Perry]

Phil I think you are being a bit unfair. Here are two stories that show pilots MUST be allowed to discuss good curry:

 

On 13 January 2018, a Diamond DA42 aircraft operated by Iroise Aéro Formation, departed from Brest Airport for LeeOn-Solent Airfield in the south of the UK. Once there, it was filled to the brim with Indian Takeaway food, which was then flown to Bordeaux Saucats Airfield, located in the heart of the Pessac-Léognan wine region. Local curry lovers enjoyed an evening of curry, beer, and good company.

 

QANTAS pilots aren’t allowed to eat the same meal in case they get food poisoning, and they often fight over the green chicken curry. Maybe it’s because humans lose up to 30 per cent of their taste and smell in the air, or maybe it’s because Qantas’ first-class recipe is genuinely delicious.

I can attest that the Qantas Cattle Class menu was VERY satisfactory on my last fight with that worthy organization Sir !

 

This was my First ever ride in a 747, in 1983 from Brisbane to London via KL, Singa, and Bahrein. . . For the first leg of the fight I was allowed to sit in the jump seat behind the captain. I was wearing a tee shirt that I'd designed and printed myself, showing a yellow DH82A with the Cringeworthy text 'Only REAL pilots fly Taildragger.' . . !

 

The Captain asked where I had flown'Tigers' and I replied that for the last few years, I was based at Casey Airfield in Vic and flew theirs. . .to which he replied instantly, "Ah yes, is that still operated by Col. Keith Hatfield and his lovely Wife Elsa ?" Jeeze, I thought. . . Well known airfield or what !

 

I was ejected from the office for the landing at KL though. . Rules is Rules . . But I had a lovely breakfast and after leaving Changi, the FO breezed past and said that if I wanted to come back to the front I could as it was very quiet and they'd had hardly any other requests. . . So I did. The FO was a 'Radio Ham' from Sydney, so we babbled on about that too. The Flight Engineer ( remember them ? ) was a serial Joker. . .t amused me to see him occasionally prodding the throttles with his clipboard without saying anything to the pilots !

 

It is a terrible shame that events in NYC / 2011 put a sudden end to cockpit visits for Plebs. . .

 

That aircraft was only half loaded with pax after Bahrein, so I wandered about the cabin a lot. chatting with people who were still awake (!). up the stairs to First class, had a drink at the bar, and helped myself to a Buffet. . no one seemed to mind. Again. Lovely Food !. Finally, laid across five seats and had some Kip. Due to a couple of delays and a diversion for unexplained reasons after Bahrein, when ALL the external lights and beacons were turned off ( ? ) the entire fight time wa 26.5 hours but I enjoyed that first Jumbo flight immensely.

 

Apart from the food, what did I learn from my foray into the front office ? Well, for one thing I learned that VOR stations had a heck of a useful range at around 35,000 feet ! Far better than in my C-182 which started losing the VHF NavCom signals at not much more than 30 NM from the omni beacon and / or ATC service. .

 

 

[Phil Perry]

We had a Two day fly-in and BBQ this last weekend at our arfield, and i got the full gamut of Monkey style radio procedures,. . to be fair, several visitors were very good and professional sounding,. . but some of the others were posted somewhere between Bad and bloody Awful. . .

 

Still, we managed to have a safe 2 days, with No real hassles, and NO ONE WAS KILLED . . .which was another Plus of course. . . 

 

The only negative bit was that Julie, the Nubile lead singer and Leader of the Band, operating from an Articulated Truck stge on Saturday Night promised me that she would wear something really sexy,. . .but the bitch went on stage in shiny leather trousers instead of the 'Split up the side' short skirt that she promised. . .

 

Women have always been a disappointment to me. . . .