The Never Ending Story

[onetrack]

.....I'm too busy prawning and keeping tourists occupied, to bother with your problems! Why don't you just depart that bitterly cold, overpopulated and rainy State, and come up to Sunny Queensland and join me on my prawn trawler! I'm looking for good deckies, and with your skills at handling rough crowds, I reckon you could...........

[bull]

1 hour ago, onetrack said:

.....I'm too busy prawning and keeping tourists occupied, to bother with your problems! Why don't you just depart that bitterly cold, overpopulated and rainy State, and come up to Sunny Queensland and join me on my prawn trawler! I'm looking for good deckies, and with your skills at handling rough crowds, I reckon you could...........

............many cases of diarrhea and increase the prawn yield. Suddenly out of the blue Turdy came flying............

[Captain]

2 hours ago, bull said:

............many cases of diarrhea and increase the prawn yield. Suddenly out of the blue Turdy came flying............

.... to contribute, namesake wize.

 

The decimation of the whitebait stocks and Capt Bull's targeting of Banana Dolphins ultimately brought attention from several GreenPiss boats that closed quickly with Capt Bull's lovely blue vessel, and they sprayed him with water just like they did with the Japanese whaling freet.

 

However  Capt Bull was waaaayyyy smarter and organized his tourist passengers, including Turbo, into a wet Tshirt competition, and boy were there some beauties on board.

 

It has been a well recognized fact over the years (he is on a WTshirt Offenders List in Bone following that incident with the see-through Tshirts at the CWA AGM) that Capt Bull's is very partial to the sight of .....

Edited March 10 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......mesh. When he was a boy he would look at fly screens for hours, and he built a collection of photos showing Queensland fly screens, which, as we know always seemed to have a hole somewhere.

He carried this on to adulthood, the photos now digital and AI enhanced. Every grubby, smelly Pub in Queensland was represented. And because there were so many flies crawling on them he started a collection on flies and joined the Queensland Fly Spotters Association, an offshoot of the AUF whose members also seemed to have a lot of flies around them and ............................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

He carried this on to adulthood, the photos now digital and AI enhanced. Every grubby, smelly Pub in Queensland was represented. And because there were so many flies crawling on them he started a collection on flies and joined the Queensland Fly Spotters Association, an offshoot of the AUF whose members also seemed to have a lot of flies around them and .........

.... they all used to joke about the irony (AUF members are all real dags (flyref) & students of irony) of flying (avref) to the QFSA meetings where they also ......

Edited March 10 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......ate sticky buns covered in flys which quickly attracted flights of Queensland Crows.

Tourists from the South have always been dismissive of the QCs which caw in a most feminine way, especialy whem they are flying or ...........................

 

[One notes that Cappy has used embedded brackets (EB) this is rarely seen in today's society, more's the pity.]

[Captain]

18 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......ate sticky buns covered in flys which quickly attracted flights of Queensland Crows.

Tourists from the South have always been dismissive of the QCs which caw in a most feminine way, especialy whem they are flying or ..........

..... sitting around like the Birds in Alfy's film, see below.

 

Those same southern tourists are unaware that more people die from attacks by QCs, than are killed annually by Saltys (same with dogs), so ........

 

A gaggle of QCs on the playset outside the Bone Rissole.

 

 

Edited March 10 by Captain

[Captain]

15 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

[One notes that Cappy has used embedded brackets (EB) this is rarely seen in today's society, more's the pity.]

Cappy is very appreciative of Turbo's perceptive note showing his appreciation of the lost art of embedded bracketeering. These types of punctuation are who we are as a people.

[turboplanner]

.......more of them really need to get a life, embrace the balmy Qeensland weather and swim in the estuaries and rivers. The photo above of the Bone RSL may not be understood by southerners. Local Bone residents only eat out in Bone when its free of QCs. A flock like this is a good indicator that Mavis is on the grog again and the customers are binning their half eaten steaks, or ....................

[Captain]

..... trying to find Fifi or Spot after they were chained up outside the Rissole while the owners had a feed and hit the pokies.

 

Many times, all that can be found is a puppy's registration disk (often mangled {by beak strikes [QC's are vicious (and tough) buggers]} by the QC feeding frenzy) embedded in a pile of QC poo.

 

Mavis has certainly been hitting the turps a little more lately, now that bull has his promotion and is off on the foamy blue, so Mave ......

Edited March 10 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....bought hersek a Drifter (sort of AVREF) did a couple of flights training and flew out to see Captain Bull, landing neatly on the deck, but a little off the centre which sent a little old Italian off his deckchair and into the .......................

[Captain]

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....bought hersek a Drifter (sort of AVREF) did a couple of flights training and flew out to see Captain Bull, landing neatly on the deck, but a little off the centre which sent a little old Italian off his deckchair and into the .......................

.... Tasman.

 

Capt Bull shrugged and said "More burley is good so don't worry about pushing the MOB button and wasting fuel. Now get his cabin cleaned out and get a vacancy advert out on WikiVacantCabins" (Bull is a calous but effective captain).

 

"Now, Mavis, tie your Drifter down and I have 6 minutes to spare, so a Thruster is available, before my next Trawler Management Meeting and Toolbox Talk, when I will raise the issue about ......

[Captain]

IN ACCORDANCE WITH ARTICLE 3 OF THE WRECK FLYING CHARTER, THE NES IS TO BE SHUT DOWN IF THERE IS NO REPLY WITHIN 48 HOURS OF THE LAST POST.

 

THE NES IS NOW CLOSED AND NO FURTHER POSTS WILL BE ACCEPTED. 

 

Signed with authority -Moderator 3

 

Edited March 13 by Captain

[turboplanner]

We can see from this post the degree of authority of Moderator 3  carries around here. A close confidant of Cappy, who had a deprived childhood, and a fetish (where he cried continuously for fresh nappies where most cried for milk, and Turbo just lay there happy for anything he got}, M3 as he is known around here has repeatedly been exposed as a cross-dressing psychopath, student of Hitler and would have been a serial killer if it wasn't for the fact that all 31 of his victims escaped.

Edited March 13 by turboplanner

[turboplanner]

......the careless flying around here, particularly on the runway where seven elderly guests have complained about ...................

[Captain]

..... Mavis's Drifter having drifted, the Thruster having thrusted, and bull in the shadows near his Jackoff, having jacked ....

[turboplanner]

......it contrary to the POH instructions and lost it over the side.

They really were looking forward to sitting on the deck chairs and seeing that Jackoff's screaming engine wrench it up into the air like a ..................

[CT9000]

......Tortice towing a house..... 

[Captain]

.... however the runway platform that Capt Bull added to the trawler gave it a profile silhouette identical to the USS Enterprise and as a result, even though he was longlineing off Dunedin, the Houthi rebels tried to dart him with 3 cruise missiles (deathlyseriousavref) that were fired from ......

[turboplanner]

.....their stronghold in Boggo Road.

They’d failed to follow instructions inputting north instead of South, and a Chicken Farm in Crimea was wiped out. This......

[CT9000]

.......was pretty good for business at the local bunny farm sorry roo farm sorry pet food sorry local chichen farm.....

[Captain]

.... as the price of chicken went up quicker than gold, and that triggered the great chicken substitution scandal which almost wiped out Turbine Industries and went close to destroying Turbos impeccable personal reputation too, ...... and all just because he had Cat Farms and the world spent some time deficient in Chicken Farms.

 

It was the drumsticks that .....

 

[onetrack]

........were the giveaway. They kicked whenever something fast flitted past them, thus making people suddenly realise they were cat drumsticks, not chicken drumsticks. If there was any doubt, the double joint was the final indicator of............

[Captain]

.... fraud ...... there is just no way to sugar coat it ...... although the honey cat/chicken peices did sell pretty well.

 

The twitching chicken tails were also a giveaway and Turbo has since expressed regret for that marketing decision (although still no apology).

 

However  ......

Edited March 14 by Captain

[Captain]

TURBO ON HIS WAY TO DAVOS EARLIER THIS YEAR.

OPERATING COSTS ARE UP THERE WHEN YOU HAVE TO BUY THE AERIAL TANKER TOO ....... BUT THAT IS THE LEVEL OF HIS PROSPERITY.