The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

.........Turbo redeemd himself when he was able to produce a video of one of the ancient chickens of Gorpington a tiny country tucked away in a valley of the Himalayas. As he said, Turbo himself had taken the video on furlough from the Khyber Pass. It showed a double jointed Black Gorpington (the g is silent in Gorpington) It was kicking at the other chickens with a double jointed legg and switching its tail like a cat.

 

He withdrew the regret for his decision, said he knew he had the video but just couldn't put his hand on it at the time,the PR people dressed him up in a giant black rooster suit with a bow tie, the chickens were labelled Black Orpington, and just ran out the doors of the franchisees, double jointed or not.

 

It wasn't until ...................

 

 

[Interesting photo. Not many people know that Turbine Defence Inc. designed that tanker drogue. The earlier ones weren't labelled and several crashed when USAF pilots pulled up behind the tanker and tried to stick that sharp thing in it. Once Turbine had labelled it, they were able to see it was the other end of the arcraft that mattered.]

[Captain]

22 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

the g is silent in Gorpington

Yes, of course, everyone knows that ...... but which one?

[turboplanner]

Turbo apologises......the second one.

[Captain]

41 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Once Turbine had labelled it

.... using his Khyber Pass combat name, hence the word that was used, ...... except that the letters "e-h-o-l-e" have fallen off.

Edited March 14 by Captain

[Captain]

43 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

He withdrew the regret for his decision, said he knew he had the video but just couldn't put his hand on it at the time,the PR people dressed him up in a giant black rooster suit with a bow tie, the chickens were labelled Black Orpington, and just ran out the doors of the franchisees, double jointed or not.

It wasn't until .......

...... the male Black Gorpintons stopped in the alley behind the chicken shops, hissed at the alley dogs, then sat with one hind leg in the air, licked their balls, and coughed up a fur ball.

 

"Hang on there" said Inspector Doubtfire, who had been sent to investighate the fraud "What was that about "hind legs", as there was nothing in my VicPol briefing about Gorpintons having .......

Edited March 14 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....hind legs, or for that matter fur.

She bent down to pat what she was sure was a cat, and the Gorpington pecked a lump out of her ...................

[Captain]

11 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....hind legs, or for that matter fur.

She bent down to pat what she was sure was a cat, and the Gorpington pecked a lump out of her ...................

..... then laid an egg, after shrieking like tom cats having a blue at midnight, and scratching her wrists as it gave her fleas.

 

This made Doubtfire gorp (.... verb, not noun defining a tasty snack) at the Gorpinton and wondered whether she should ......

Edited March 14 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......start breeding them, but realised the breed was secured by ............

[Captain]

8 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......start breeding them, but realised the breed was secured by ............

..... Turbine Genetic Mutations and Manipulations Inc, and the fleas each had a tiny Patent Pending sign on their hind legs that are 25 times the size of those on a normal flea (perhaps in the future to compete with frog's legs as a delicacy in Turbine Michelin Restaurants Pty Ltd, as is TGMaMI's ultimate aim).

 

Doubtfire then had a particularly playful Gorpinton pussy run up the inside of her VicPol issued skirt, and she was at that instant certain that the pussy was intent on checking out her ........

Edited March 14 by Captain

[Captain]

Below is a rare photo of a Gorpinton about the shed it's skin as it grows. This process is very similar to that of a lobster, and they are very vulnerable to indiscriminate pecking or genital licking, for about 12 hours while the new white skin hardens.

 

[bull]

6 hours ago, Captain said:

Doubtfire then had a particularly playful Gorpinton pussy run up the inside of her VicPol issued skirt, and she was at that instant certain that the pussy was intent on checking out her

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,very large and very loose...................                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                [By the way whilst Bull was perusing facebook and wondering why his posts where getting mucked around with he came across an old photo of Turdo and The rat at the blue oyster bar]

[Captain]

9 hours ago, bull said:

Note Ahlox in the background while Turbs and Cappy discussed the world economy, foreign currency exchange rates, and whether to maintain the Turbine Holdings Trust Company in the Caymans, given the latest gold price and the fragile futures index for nickel & cadmium. 

Edited March 15 by Captain

[Captain]

9 hours ago, bull said:

,,very large and very loose......

..... knickers, which were renowned  in law enforcement circles, for ......

[turboplanner]

.......grabbing innocent people off the streets and putting them in the knick.

Sometimes they grabbed someone famous like Cappy or Een or Epaulette, and the resulting ...............

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

.......grabbing innocent people off the streets and putting them in the knick.

Sometimes they grabbed someone famous like Cappy or Een or Epaulette, and the resulting ...............

..... outcry on X, and on certain aviation Fora (pluralofForumref), went "viral", as they say, and the knick-ees trended on the interweb all around the world, officially turning them into "influencers" and therefore able to easily monetize their fame.

 

After seeing this, Turbo formed a company named Turbine Low Level Little Satellites PLC to take on Starlink and as phase 2, he then put himself in a compromised position so as to be knicked by Doubtfire.

 

Doubtfire found Turbo in a ........

[turboplanner]

......Opium Den in Cabramatta with a Great Dane, Bloodhound, three Caboodles and a CASA FoI Operative, all dressed in Drag. Hauntingly there was the shadow of Cappy in the background. He'd painted himself in greenscreen but couldn't hide the eyebrows or teeth.

Doubtfire knew what to do.......................

[Captain]

4 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Doubtfire knew what to do.......................

Reply sent but it appears to have been removed.

[turboplanner]

[This post has ben written be Mod3. We dunt wana see anymore posts like the larst one. Disguting.]

 

.......She put on a Led Zepple disk and everyone danced outta their.

Ha Ha .................................................

 

[Captain]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

[This post has ben written be Mod3. We dunt wana see anymore posts like the larst one. Disguting.]

 

.......She put on a Led Zepple disk and everyone danced outta their.

"Ha Ha" .............

...... said Jimmy Page to Robert Plant "We have made the big time again, as Turbo has mentioned Led Zepple in his post today, and that is sure to get our playlist up the ratings on Spotify."

 

"Too right" said Bob "As Turbo really knows his music and I think that he also knows ........

 

The members of Led Zepple sitting on his Jag, back when a young and enthusiastic, yet slightly naive, Turbo was their manager. Bobby Plant's bum-print on the bonnet increased the Jag's value by 80% ......... just like Elle McP does to pushbikes that she rides.

Edited March 16 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......that these four people started out as Russian KGB spies, but got bored with dropping letters in letterboxes and wearing poisonous hand cream, and really wanted to be poms. This didn't happen often; millions had flowed the other way to Australia, Canada, USA, Barbados and India where they proceeded to correct all the local speeches and customs until they were ................

[Captain]

..... completely accepted as first nations Aussies.

 

In the case of the KGB types, they settled as the Wantabadgery Mob, and built a Vodka still, where they made what was marketed as First Aussie's OP Vodka, from witchety grubskis and Koala bearskis filtered through paperbarkski.

 

In addition, based on Turbo's above post he has, quite by accident, solved the oft posed mystery of "What did Gorby do as a young Bloke?" and there in that photo it is obvious that the bloke on the left is Mikael Gorbachov.

 

We still have no answer for what Vlad "Bad Boy" Putin did as a nipper, as he was more into Punk Rock and a mixture of Johnny Rotten with Peter, Paul & Mary, so photos are thin on the ground, although Onesie & Planey (separately of course) spent a considerable period in London as part of the music scene, where they ......

Edited March 16 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....used to get into step and marh across the road. Then they'd turn around and march back, hour after hour. You Johnny Lenon, aged three used to sit by the road making mud pies and watching them, and when the Beatles formed copied them in an Album picture which became famous around the world.

 

Unlike today, they had no idea what a Corn Flake was and ............

[Captain]

..... their knowledge of Coco Pops was also lacking. (It is now widely recognised that Coco produces these in a manner similar to the Kopi Luwak fancy excreted coffee beans that are so sought after by celebrities).

 

That company change, and the resultant hiatus, was needed primarily because Charlie Kellog had taken a decision to restructure the company to compete more effectively with Turbine Cereals & Excessive Sugar Addition PLC.

 

Charlie certainly was no dill, and once things settled down he .......

Edited March 16 by Captain

[onetrack]

....decided he'd also like to go head-to-head with the Turbine conglomerate in numerous other fields - especially after sighting the documents that outlined the massive profits in Cat farms, joint ventures with CT9000 in rabbit destruction, and the extensive property development and land holdings in the Spratlys. 

 

But the thing that really raised Charlies interest was the Turbine Aviation profits. It appeared aviators were constantly ripe for scalping. Just mention a new aircraft accessory and add a couple of zeros to the regular non-aviation price, and the punters were sucked in, like it was a pea and thimble bet table at the local fair.

 

Accordingly, Charlie looked at how aircraft accessories could added to the Corn Flakes factory lines. This would take a little ingenuity, but he was sure it could be done. Via a mutual friend he found a bloke in Tasmania who had factory modification skills - and aviation skills as well. He was the prefect fit for the job. Charlie called this bloke, and found out that..........

[Captain]

1 hour ago, onetrack said:

Accordingly, Charlie looked at how aircraft accessories could added to the Corn Flakes factory lines. This would take a little ingenuity, but he was sure it could be done. Via a mutual friend he found a bloke in Tasmania who had factory modification skills - and aviation skills as well. He was the prefect fit for the job. Charlie called this bloke, and found out that.......

..... he was at sea at the time fu decimating the NZ whitebait stocks again, but he expected to be back in Tazzy soon, however never one to lose an opportunity, bull said "Just hang on a tick there Chucky, while I get the last 3 kms of longline in and I'll .....