turboplanner Posted September 18, 2009 Posted September 18, 2009 Turbopranner wasn't quite sure what Tomo meant, but he was currently freezing his but off, dressed in camouflage, face blackened, lying in a tree plantation adjacent to the field, covered in branches which were dripping freezing frigging water down his neck. He was looking at 10 cheeks of five bums of the escapees who had also covered themselves with branches but had forgotten to cover their rears....
turboplanner Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 The escapees were getting well and truly sore by now holed up in the plantation. They couldn't move across the open ground until dark. "Or Big Noters here now", said Aki "Rook at way Lat plance around his Jab admiring porish" "There Tan Pussy" said Nob and they all giggled "SSSHH!" said Aki, "he not TOTALLY deaf" "There AdminDilector" said Toshi "he rook very formal today" "We got one each now" said Shin "Just wait till dlum get led hot and they start p*ssing in each other's pockets, then we go". Turbo was lying under his cover of branches a few metres away. The blow flys were really starting to buzz round him. He's taken the SAS practice of not washing for a week before an operation, and he was beginning to wonder if the buzz would give him away.....
turboplanner Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 It was 7.45 pm, well after the bed time of some of the Cowra visitors, like the Rat. Some had gone to the dinner, some had gone to bed and some were just idling around talking, but all were away from their aircraft. "Let's make a run for it" whispered Akahiko (Australian name hiccup) Turbo saw the shadows crossing the paddock, and stiff legged, followed them with half a dozen rabbit traps which alternatively would serve to scone them then secure them, in the old way. Just as they reached the aircraft there was a blood curdling "HALT!" and the area was bathed in floodlights. It was the ASIC man. "Show me your cards!" he said, but the escapees just looked at him blankly. "Show me your passports" said the ASIC man, confident he was on a winner tonight. "We are Japanese prisoners of war" said Aki, Serial numbers 2,3,4,5 and 6, so you can see we been here quite a while. "What happened to No 1?" asked the ASIC man "He rand on ship on way out" said Aki tactfully. "Well", said the ASIC man, "If you haven't got cards and you haven't go passports, I'm going to have to deport you" Aki turned to Nob and whispered "This a Light Fligging Iriot!", but turning back to the ASIC man said "Well a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Shortly after, the visitors heard the whine of a Rex starting up ready to take off downwind. The flight reached Sydney soon after and there was a quiet transfer to the Jetstar direct flight to Osaka, or Oska as the locals call it and nine hours later they were eating sushi and being debriefed. None of the Cowra visitors were aware of the near miss; as far as they were aware the Cowra Breakout occurred during the War and all escapees were recaptured. Turbo had been caught on the airfield without an Asic Card and in possession of non-humane rabbit traps, which was a more serious offence. The Feds did a deal with him. Go back to Victoria, say nothing about the events, and donate one boat motor per year to the ASIC water ski club Inc.
Captain Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 "Come on your blokes" said Acki to Tacky (who had been smoking some wacky tabaccy) "Lets just grab an RV7 and get out of here, but make sure we knock off one with tip tanks or we'll never make it." "There is an emaculate RV10 down in Row 7" answered Nobu, being ever the tightarse "That would take all of us, thereby allowing us to share the fuel bill and other running costs." "No" responded Acki "Bugger the RV10 and all the other RV's. I'm waiting for Ahlocks's SportStar. I heard his inbound call on the Icom handheld that Nobu bought on eBay, and as soon as he gets here I'm gunna grab it (as he seldom locks it up for fear that he won't be able to get it unlocked in time)." "You know" reflected Nobu "How when we all hitched up to Natfly last time, everyone reckoned that Jabiru's are like bums. Well here in Cowra at this SAAA knees-up, RV's are like dings too." "That is why I long for the glorious 'difference' and performance of a SportStar, so duck up to the servo and get me 4 gerald-cans of premium unleaded, a hat and some 30+ sunscreen, a rivet gun and a ...........................
turboplanner Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 The Japanese escapees were kicking up their heels seeing the sights of modern Osaka, so they had no need for RVanythings. Aki was immediately appointed CEO of the JeansRUs chain, Nob got a jib at McDonalds, Michio went in Unemployment, and the others decided they'd just bum around on Harleys for a few months.
Captain Posted September 19, 2009 Posted September 19, 2009 The Japanese escapees were kicking up their heels seeing the sights of modern Osaka, so they had no need for RVanythings. Aki was immediately appointed CEO of the JeansRUs chain, Nob got a jib at McDonalds, Michio went in Unemployment, and the others decided they'd just bum around on Harleys for a few months. But in reflective moments, over 7 hand-grenades of hot Saki, Acki was known to reflect in words to the following effect ... "But I do miss the free spirit, the Henry Lawson like qualities and the laconic style that I have known to love in the Skippy psychy, which is reflected in the new Board of RA-Aus ............. I miss the cheap meat ....... and I miss Nanna (ohhh how I miss Nanna) so I'm gunna go back to that ASIC-free land on the Lachlan that I long to call home, as soon as I sober up, I'll buy 100 prime acres, build an 800 m strip (with a 500 m X-strip for mergencies), and I'll get me a 170 or a SportSzar". "What do ya reckon Nob? Are you with me? And if so we'll ...........
Guest Decca Posted September 20, 2009 Posted September 20, 2009 ………“What!!!” Spat Nob, spraying dribble like he was approaching the age of dementia, and as if to show he still had his marbles intact; “We are back in the land of our beloved Emperor, and I’m at work with all these young Macca sheilas”……… and his last word may have been his final mistake……
Captain Posted September 20, 2009 Posted September 20, 2009 ………“What!!!” Spat Nob, spraying dribble like he was approaching the age of dementia, and as if to show he still had his marbles intact; “We are back in the land of our beloved Emperor, and I’m at work with all these young Macca sheilas”……… and his last word may have been his final mistake…… ..... as it exposed the fact that Nobu fancied the Skippy B&S sheilas more than he did the Geisha sheilas. And he explained "That's because the Geisha sheilas don't ........................
Guest Decca Posted September 20, 2009 Posted September 20, 2009 ......don't say "would you'se rike flies with that?"
turboplanner Posted September 20, 2009 Posted September 20, 2009 And that's where the old saying "There's no flies on our sheilas" came from
Captain Posted September 20, 2009 Posted September 20, 2009 And that's where the old saying "There's no flies on our sheilas" came from ..... except for the couple out the back of the B&S who had 22 Bundies by 11 pm and have been lying out in the bushes ever since. "Just my sort of sheiles" answered Nobu as we have a lot in common, because of ......
Captain Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 ..... except for the couple out the back of the B&S who had 22 Bundies by 11 pm and have been lying out in the bushes ever since. "Just my sort of sheiles" answered Nobu as we have a lot in common, because of ...... "I object to the use of that disparaging Aussie term for the female form" said Sheila. "Me too" added Nob as a s***stir, as he knew how to wind up Skippies just like they did when starting their Zeros during the ***. "Themz was the dayz" he thought. Then Sheila added "Youze should all refer to us as ...................
turboplanner Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 Then Sheila added "Youze should all refer to us as ................... "aviatrixes" They all laughed and the Rat said "trixers more like it...."
Captain Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 "aviatrixes" They all laughed and the Rat said "trixers more like it...." "I don't just do "tricks"" said the bloke in the Pitts Special "I do an "artistic performance of aerial high-jinks", and please don't refer to me by using the derogatory Aussie term "bloke"" the bloke added. "Each one of mine is a "performance" too" added that Nanna sheila. "I'll second that" responded that Nobu bloke, who was back in OZ and keen to play hide the ..................
turboplanner Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 "I'll second that" responded that Nobu bloke, who was back in OZ and keen to play hide the .................. "...sushi"
Captain Posted September 21, 2009 Posted September 21, 2009 "...sushi" "Tee Hee" lesponded Nobu "Bunghole just made a little Japanese Lestaulant chef's "in-joke" that we think is very funneee ........ as we Japanese are well known as having a strong ability to laugh at ourselves .... plus you should see what me and Nanna can do with sushi, even on a hot Cowla day, so the Bunghole is ..........
ahlocks Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 ...correct, and unusually succinct. With all the talk of level 2 training in general population, the Bangholme bandit had been hard at work organising RPL's derived from his outboard motor experience. :bmwrider: "Whaddya mean I'm not supposed to remove rotoraxe cylinder heads like that??" scowled Tubz :patch: as he dropped the 13 pound sledgie on the floor. :Disappointed: "C'mon Tubz!" encouraged the examiner, "You should know that Rotoraxes have to be finessed into submission rather than bludgeon to death like an Evinrude." :rolleyes1: "You could tly some of this old cordite" offered Nobu. "Then Nanna not onry thing in NES thah go off with bang!...." ======================= Ahloh is still attempting to extract pictures of the elusive Cowla Lat from the telephone. Something highry suspicious going on with them.....
Captain Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Ahloh is still attempting to extract pictures of the elusive Cowla Lat from the telephone. Something highry suspicious going on with them..... Administrator's Editorial - Reave the Lat arone
Captain Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Yes, he is UGLY..... Collect ...... Reave the ugry Lat arone Because, with his gold tooth, he can be viscous (10/50). "Don't wolly" yelled the Nob, "For I am a ...........
turboplanner Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Collect ...... Rive the ugry Lat arone Because, with his gold tooth, he can be viscous (10/50). "Don't wolly" yelled the Nob, "For I am a ........... "....Viscostatic Man. "I go to the Visco every Saturday night, and when a brawl looks about to elupt, we gou outside and bow to each other repeatedly in the most insulting manner because....."
Tomo Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 "I go to the Visco every Saturday night, and when a brawl looks about to elupt, we gou outside and bow to each other repeatedly in the most insulting manner because....." ....... with his gold tooth, he can be viscous (10/50).:pc strikes back:
turboplanner Posted September 23, 2009 Posted September 23, 2009 Viscous was the word. He went down to the local Visco and started singing "VISCO visco VISCO MANNNNNN!" while dancing from one skinny leg to the other in the hope of attracting a partner, but only a stray cat showed any interest in him. She pounced....
Captain Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Viscous was the word. He went down to the local Visco and started singing "VISCO visco VISCO MANNNNNN!" while dancing from one skinny leg to the other in the hope of attracting a partner, but only a stray cat showed any interest in him. She pounced.... "Stone the clows" yelled Nobu, who had his own stick of cordite ready for Nanna "I've never seen anyone sclatched THERE before by a moggie. That must really hurt, sclatched bunghole-san". "Too right, cobber" whispered Turbo through clenched teeth while he sucked in air to disguise the pain."That's because I ...........
turboplanner Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 "Too right, cobber" whispered Turbo through clenched teeth while he sucked in air to disguise the pain."That's because I ........... "....should have known the rat would dodge out of the way, leaving me to face the fur....."
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