Tomo Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 ........ so with a blur, Turblow spun around rather perturbed.............
turboplanner Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 ........ so with a blur, Turblow spun around rather perturbed............. ...pulled the cattle prod from his hip pocket and headed for the glossy orbs of The Rat...
ahlocks Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 .....Because, with his gold tooth. "Ahsoh!" exclaimed Ahloh as the penny finally dlopt. "It be Lat's gold fang that is causing the probrem! The camera can't handle the grint off the legendary fang and is clapping out when trying to capcha Lat image!" :rolleyes1: Ahloh scurried off to find a "glinting tooth filter" for the camera (....which is really a phone ...that is waaaay over complicated for such a simple person to understand. :uhoh2:) "You could hit bruddy fing with 13 pound percussion adjuster!" suggested TurboSan, feigning interest :cool_shades:, as he flicked the cattle prod to ON.... ============== Agricultural Trivia: Semen is collected from bulls for use in artificial insemination by placing an electrical probe up it's rectum. :yuk: Or does Turbz already know this and planning on doing some experiments on rats...
Captain Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Agricultural Trivia:Semen is collected from bulls for use in artificial insemination by placing an electrical probe up it's rectum. :yuk: Or does Turbz already know this and planning on doing some experiments on rats... Bovine Observation - And some people wonder why bulls are always cranky and mostly sit in the corner of the paddock on their own. You would too.
DarkSarcasm Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 suggested TurboSan, feigning interest :cool_shades:, as he flicked the cattle prod to ON.... ...and snuck up behind the Lat who was distlacted wondering why the bulls in the corner of the paddock were clanky and sitting on those doughnut shaped cushions... Dalkcastic has just discovered she has been mentioned in previous posts (after madly reading to catch up and try and work out what the h*ll is going on in this story) and hopes her attempt at posting doesn't disappoint despite the lack of Jabbaloos on froats...
Guest Decca Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Gleat discovely, Dalky. You arready dispray an incledibre understanding of the mentarity of the contlibutors here. You fit in well, but wirr never become a rawyer by persisting, but it’s gleat fun.
DarkSarcasm Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Dalky is going to fail her exams now...or at least wlite them in a vely stlange ranguage
Guest Decca Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Just answer a), b), c) or d) in random fashion. I wasn't into blogs 'til I saw yours. It's very well done. Decca.
DarkSarcasm Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 I wourd do (when in doubt plick C) but raw exams are essays... Cheers about the brog too - elelyone else, rook at it Now...back to the Lat's impending adventure with a cattle plod...
ahlocks Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 "Horry snappin' bull sphincters!" shouted Ahloh in jubilation:jump:"Darkcastik has come to play!!" "She even undastand the ringo." added Nobu, as he readied another lump of cordite in case the Lat takes to running away.... =============== Ever notice how spell check is a waste of time in the NES lately?
Captain Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 "Horry snappin' bull sphincters!" shouted Ahloh in jubilation:jump:"Darkcastik has come to play!!" "She even undastand the ringo." added Nobu, as he readied another lump of cordite in case the Lat takes to running away.... =============== Ever notice how spell check is a waste of time in the NES lately? Welcome Darky. You have made a nice contribution ..... but I fear that you are actually BlondeOptimist in disguise ............ and as a result of your input to the NES, I must issue the customary warning to all of the others that "There is a duck on the pond" so make sure your language is improved and your hands are always above the table. "I ruv duck" volunteered Acki. "So do I" said a nearby Angus Bull "And I would much prefer that they use one of them instead of that cattle prod". "We are used to duck here in Wagga" said the Lat "As that is what everyone does every time Ahloh comes in to rand." "Ahroh is OKthough" said Darky to Tubbs "As he is a ..........................
Tomo Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 ..... duck.. and re rike ducks in wagga x2:thumb_up:, although he frys a splortslar rif rivets, but I dink we can let dat one floor through the rike, disrike test...:confused: wooden't rou agree?;) said Turblow to Darclasticwho'sarawyer and is here in disclise to find evidence why Bigpete hasn't contlibuted to the NES for a roooooonnnggg rong time:crying: So rong a time ago in flacked that darkclastic doesn't even know who bigpete probably is..... He was one of de best emocitan pro's around... Ahloh coming second on de ricta scale... Anyray back to de cattle prod... day work real good to get the others out of bed:ecstatic::thumb_up:
Captain Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 Agricultural Trivia:Semen is collected from bulls for use in artificial insemination by placing an electrical probe up it's rectum. :yuk: Or does Turbz already know this and planning on doing some experiments on rats... SCIENTIFIC ADVISORY - In the interest of Veterinary and Medical Science, this will be 1st trialled on humans in Wagga Wagga this evening. Contact the Lat for tickets. And contact Ahlow if you are a volunteer. Disclaimer - This test is not gender specific, as we have a pink prod too.
turboplanner Posted September 24, 2009 Posted September 24, 2009 The Cowra escapees were having breakfast in Hiroshima, when Shinichi came running up to tell them about the increased NES activity. “Darkasm posted” he blurted out, and they all dropped their rice balls off the chopsticks into their miso soup. Remember, they were old world Japanese from a time when the wife walked behind the husband and didn’t give him any sh*t, and they had missed the westernisation of Japan, so there was a lot of sucking air through their teeth as they contemplated this horrendous development. Shinichi passed his Iphone around and they all read the posts with increasing concern. “Decca up to his old tlicks again” said Nobushi “rike a moth to the flame” Just then Michio arrived in a taxi “What’s with these things” he said “first I get hit in nuts when reaching for door, then power door closes over my flaperon” (aviation term for Planey). “Never mind that, look at this”, said Nobushi. Michio read for a while, then said “What story with this BigPete?” “I can explain that’, said Turbo, who was in Japan as a result of unusual circumstances. With blackened face he had been following the Japanese escapees across the paddocks when the ASIC card inspector pounced. Realising who his true enemy was, Turbo had rushed forward and was successfully choking the Inspector when more rushed in, overpowered him, and before anyone could ask any questions had given him a free trip to Osaka. “Let’s see him get back without a passport” said the ASIC card inspector, and Turbo had been bumming around the streets of Japan ever since, so he went on to explain. “BigPete was an alien from Emoticon, and only spoke emoticon, so he gravitated to Rec Flying and would frequently criticise posters who dared to write in English. “This was in the days of the Previous Administrator who allowed the emoticon supply to run out and BigPete was silenced forever. “He tried to return to Emoticon, making two trips to Melbourne to buy Christmas lights and things to attract other Emoticonites, but the Jab voltage was too low and we never heard from him again, more’s the pity because he could pull on a good story when he was needled” “How you going to get back?” asked Nobushi “Easy” said Turbo, “in the boot of a Toyota Corolla…….”
DarkSarcasm Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 , “in the boot of a Toyota Corolla…….” ...which has been turned into a submarine by the combined genius (or stupidity) of Mythbusters and Top Gear (UK)...
Tomo Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 Dat's the best ding I heard for a rong time mused the Lat... Toyota Coralla made into a submarine... dat's de best place for dem to be said the Rattatatat, outa sight, outa mind.....................
turboplanner Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 Dat's the best ding I heard for a rong time mused the Lat... Toyota Coralla made into a submarine... dat's de best place for dem to be said the Rattatatat, outa sight, outa mind..................... Turbo was feeling very nervous - with marine engines 20 minutes was a long time for him. He dropped the revs and headed south below periscope depth, navigating with the gps from his car and a 10 Yen compass he'd managed to buy from a guy outside Yokohama Wharf, who was also selling XRay sunglasses, so he'd bought a pair for the Rat. He jumper at every little rattle from the engine. About an hour later there was a loud knocking from the engine room, and with his heart in his mouth, for there were no xoy torches or crow bars down here, he opened the hatch......... Out stepped The Rat, coughing and sneezing from the fumes......
ahlocks Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 "All ahead full helmsman!" The Lat ordered as he coughed up a soot goolie. :yuk: "I've snibbed up the cylinder bolts and incanted the Jabatoo prayer, (:stirring pot:) so she'll hold." he added. "Aye Aye Captain!" :DevilDog:responded the Helm (crikey! who'd have thought that the Lat's real name would ever be used again?? ) as TurboSan rechecked the compass and set a course of 290 degrees :ne_nau: for the run south to home.....
turboplanner Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 as TurboSan rechecked the compass and set a course of 290 degrees for the run south to home..... ....which explains why Avlovaks frequently goes missing for days on end when he goes flying. There was a shuffling sound from the rear and it became obvious that Akahiko had stowed away. The boys had bought him a camera, and in the finish had become heartily sick of him stopping every few steps top take a new shot. There was no magic to the Toyota Corolla boot into submarine magic, they'd been down at the Naval area in Kure and Aki called over a young girl to take a group photo. Just as she said "Say Cheeses!" they bundled Aki and Turbo into the sub, slammed the hatch, and got a Cat D7 to push it into the water. Meanwhile back at sea Aki was showing Turbo and The Rat around. "This the controls" he said. "As you can see pretty rough, much like Tecram" "This the engine controls" and Turbo turned white "We operate under Led Right all way to Sydney" he said "This peliscope, has sound recorder as well - boys put in tape for you, and as he pressed the "Play" button they heard "Crick go the Shears boys, Crick..Crick...Crick.." "This the Toiret he said" "What's that big lever with the ratchet handle?" asked Turbo "Hard to squeeze a turd out against water pressure" said Aki "this give you reverage" There was a thud down in the crew's quarters as Tomo rolled off a top bunk and hit the floor, he'd been at the Cowra BBQ, had too much to drink and passed out and the escapees had decided to carry him with them as hostage.......
Captain Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 ....There was a thud down in the crew's quarters as Tomo rolled off a top bunk and hit the floor, he'd been at the Cowra BBQ, had too much to drink and passed out and the escapees had decided to carry him with them as hostage....... "Hey" said Tomo the Homo (sapian) "How am I gunna post my stuff on face-book, splitter, my personal blog, this forum, pppproon, the Dalbydailycoss, www.TomoTheHomo(sapian).com.au, and how is Darky gunna tell everyone about her excellent aviation adventures when we are down here below perilouscope depth (and I have no Vodaphone coverage either). "No wuckers" said The Nob "As you can use a few of our precious callier pigeons." "But we are 50 ft below sea level" responded Tubbo who was on the ball (even though they had also been scratched by the moggie). "Of sh#t" said Nobu "No wonder our messages never got received. Hey Acki, make a note that we need carrier penguins instead, a tiny torpedo tube to fire them from ............. and ...........
ahlocks Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 ....which explains why Avlovaks frequently goes missing for days on end when he goes flying. "Tee Hee... :ha ha:Sirry TurboPranner... Everone know sun sets in the north east when use 10 yen compass." :scratch head: the escapees had decided to carry him with them as hostage....... ... but they hadn't planned on a complication with the ransom negotiation. "Whatayermean you want us to pay you to get him back??!!" :ace:protested the Mayor of Dalbyville..... =============== P.S. Carrier penguins!!!
DarkSarcasm Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 "Of sh#t" said Nobu "No wonder our messages never got received. Hey Acki, make a note that we need carrier penguins instead, a tiny torpedo tube to fire them from ............. and ........... ...a compass so they can find where they're going... Sarkdarcasm thinks the image of a penguin reading a map was too good to give up...but how would they hold it without opposable thumbs??
Tomo Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 www.TomoTheHomo(sapian).com.au[/url], and how is Darky gunna tell everyone about her excellent aviation adventures when we are down here below perilouscope depth (and I have no Vodaphone coverage either). .... Well de Rat has greatly under estimated the Tomo, because he had a few leetle fandangled devices tucked away. Firstly he thought ahead and put a little ariel on top of a periliscope, and it's all been water proofed with sillyastic so it want have any disastrous feedback :thumb_up::thumb_up: Now through a device called a wireless router, it connects to the leetle ariel out side, which is extended up into the air (aviation term) when in use:nod: Now out comes the usb modem that plugs into the wireless router, which connects wirelessly to the wireless ariel outside on top of the perilouscope. And through a wireless network It connect to my healthy Apple laptop, and Wham! we have de internet, tanks to telstra nextG wireless broadband... but due to wearing my red shirt the day I bought it... the telstra guy charged me up the street pole:black_eye: and left me High and Dry! (aviation term's) Now out pops Slarti's Fancy mobile phone, and attemps to hack into my wireless internet, but being a pretty smart kid, I made it so he couldn't without me adding his mac address to the system... But Slarti being who Slarti is......................
DarkSarcasm Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 Sarkdarcasm thinks that this Toyota Corolla is clearly related to the TARDIS to be able to fit so much inside it Will Tomo be able to keep control of his wireless network long enough to send a plea for help to the Mayor of Dalbyville or will Slarti take over and use up Tomo's download limit?...
turboplanner Posted September 25, 2009 Posted September 25, 2009 ...a compass so they can find where they're going... Sarkdarcasm thinks the image of a penguin reading a map was too good to give up...but how would they hold it without opposable thumbs?? ...So Turbo attached the famous $2.00 compass he'd bought from Bigleswirthless (who has been quiet for some time now) for 20 cents. In their biks Darkasm - their eyes are in the side of their head, so they can take a one eyed view.
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