The Never Ending Story

[Flyer]

Apart from the Guru and Bigjobs hanging around, the Flyer of more Jabbas encouraged the Big Kahoona Ian the Administrator to stay away from the cancer sticks as well as maccas.

 

The Flyer of more Jabbas has managed to avoid the cancer producing coffin nails for over 12 months now and reduce his girth by some 17kgs thereby allowing him to fit more easily into the smaller jabs known as the LSA's :big_grin:

 

 

[BigPete]

So can'treademGeoff (also known as Gunna to his mates as in: "One day I'm Gunna paint my Jabiroo") :big_grin: tries to pass of his need for specs by blaming the funnier members of the NES. :ah_oh:

 

IHaveToWorkSomeTimePete :big_grin: can't believe the amount of posting happening in the NES (while he was earning a quid) although he does note it is of questionable quality. "completelyinsensitiveandshortlytobeincapacitatedPete" :yuk::yuk:

 

SLARTIHOTPANTS Heh heh heh Now that's FUNNEEE!!!!! (wish I'd said it).

 

The Fryer has a thing about BBB - as he can't seem to stop talking about her - must be a good story there I'm tippin'. :thumb_up:

 

HeartbrokenPete will not be able to make either the Cowra or Goulburn happenings as his "youbloodybettertakemetoMelbournetoseemy

 

grandkidsorelseOtherhalf" calmly request his presence at some very special family gatherings. i_dunno

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[Captain]

HeartbrokenPete will not be able to make either the Cowra or Goulburn happenings as his "youbloodybettertakemetoMelbournetoseemygrandkidsorelseOtherhalf" calmly request his presence at some very special family gatherings.

.................... and verily it came to pass that all members of the forum slowly (for some are thick {while others are just mildly rotund}) realized that they all had a "youbloodybettertakemetosomewheretoseemygrandkidsorelseOtherhalf".

 

 

 

"I wonder if they could possibly all be the same "youbloodybettertakemetoMelbournetoseemygrandkidsorelseOtherhalf" who is moving around the forum members in some form of perverse roster system ..... and pleasuring them all ..... very often" said the Skipper. (Except for Slartihotpants who has had a few and mathematically broken the daisy chain {but none were called Daisy}).

 

 

 

"I know how to test this" said statisticallycorrectPete "I'll set up a spreadsheet with real-time capabilities and all members can log in the location and timing of their "youbloodybettertakemetoMelbournetoseemygrandkidsorelseOtherhalf"

 

 

 

"Mine's not here at the moment" advised the crappyCaptian.

 

 

 

"That's weird, neither is mine" said freeasabirdPete

 

 

 

"We'll fit her with a GPS tracking system the next time she calls in at my joint for some pleasure" said the technicallycompetentFlyer. "That way we'll be able to track her and see if she runs further than Buddy Franklin (or gets out of position)".

 

 

 

And it turned out that it was the same woman masquerading as 6 or 7 "youbloodybettertakemetoMelbournetoseemygrandkidsorelseOtherhalf's" and having her way with all forum members as she rotated.

 

 

 

"I don't believe it" said feelingviolatedPete, and I was going to take her to Melbourne instead of Cowra. "I'll go and give her a piece of my mind right now" ....................

 

 

 

[planedriver]

Anyway, Geoff's very happy now, as he bought a new pair of specs from Bias Boating Warehouse. This new pair have marine drain-plugs at the bottom of the lenses, so there's no excuse for him not being able to laugh, and read as well.

 

BuggermegottogotomelbournePete suddenly had this idea of having the special family gathering moved to Goulburn.

 

I'll invite everyone to meet there, and that'll swell the numbers.

 

Not being able to remember whether the Melbourne do, was for a wedding, christening, funeral, or a divorce party, ForgetfulPete said " i'll become PastorPete for the weekend", and then i'll be able to take care of it personally , and get it over and done with quickly.

 

It's a nice ride up there, even if I have drive, he thought.

 

Better watch my speed this time, as Goulburn is Plods own Country and some ot the rookies may be a bit on the keen side.

 

The kids will enjoy seeing all the planes and can have a Slartibanger sanga, and i'll even cut the crust off the bread, for the wrinkley rello's with wobbley teeth.

 

Whats more, I still get to have good time.:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin: and see my mates.

 

CompletelyinsensitiveandshortlytobeincapacitatedPete" :yuk::yuk: had been having bad dreams, and kept saying "before you do anything to me, make sure it's my spectacles you remove. Yes spectacles I said, and make sure you get that bit right"

 

Yesterday the Riverland girl shocked me with the news that she was getting married to a guy from country Victoria. I asked who was going to be the best man?

 

"I have'nt decided yet" came the reply, "there's so many to choose from, and I can't remember them all".

 

Definatelty:wasnt me:said Friarpuk, "I live on the other side of the fence" pointing towards the monastery.

 

Then who could it possibly be?..............

 

 

[BigPete]

Fortunately (for him) NearlyKnackerlessPete :ah_oh: woke in the nick of time (if you get my drift) as the surgeon was about to make the mistake of ScaredofScapelsPete's life. thumb_down

 

"Don't believe everything that PriorF:censored: tells you" said PastaPete i_dunno as he munched on a spagbog sandwich, "he's not as pure and sinless as he makes out".

 

(yes, Ian and Slarti, I know I'm on unsteady ground, but I think its funny) so don't .

 

The poor riverland girl is in a real fix as she can't remember just who might be the father :confused: (although she does remember sampling the blessed wine with the Friar).

 

The poor girls father (a Thruster Thrasher) :yuk: is also a bit slow on the uptake (that should generate a bit of flack) and wants to know about his dowry (who's gunna pay me three chickens and a goat) is his unanswered question.........

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[Flyer]

Guru Swami-gee figured that 3 chickens and a goat was a reasonable price for a riverland girl whoever a riverland girl was...even if the father was a thruster thrasher.

 

The Guru (thats Guru Swami BuggertherestofyouImallrightthanksjack-gee) figured that a thruster thrasher who'd survived this long couldn't be too bad because he would have survived his fair share of engine outs by now and was probably of suitable pedigree to be a father anyway, regardless of what IvealmostlostmyknackersPete thought.....

 

 

[Captain]

Methinks that posts 328 - 332 have raised the following questions that need answering before the N.E.S proceeds further"

 

 

 

1 It is noted that BigPete cannot make it to either Goulburn or Cowra and quoted some lame excuse (which didn't involve a LAME) about having to go to Melbourne............. so the question again needs to be asked - HAS ANYONE EVER ACTUALLY SEEN BIGPETE?

 

 

 

(I know that Ian claims to have seen him at the last Natfly, but that is not a reliable sighting as Ian was off the fags at the time, so he was agro and in his durry-less state was seeing PinkElephants .... as well as BigPetes)

 

 

 

2 Is LittlePete actually BigPete's grandson, or is LittlePete really just the thing that we all thought of first when he initially mentioned it?

 

 

 

3 Is the Riverland girls dowry goat a virgin?

 

 

 

4 What is the Flyer's history that has triggered his obsession with the Swami and with Bronny, ................. and did it feel nice at the time?

 

 

 

5 How could BigPete possibly ignore Planey's invitation to go to Goulburn (see Q 1 above)?

 

 

 

6 How come F.Puk is constantly being drawn into the sexual inuendo of the NES, and is this just a vain attempt at respectability by those contributors?

 

 

 

7 Why doesn't SlartiHotPants write in more ... or is he just too busy banning forum members to be a part of this litereray masterpiss?

 

 

 

Please clarify the above before proceeding further.

 

 

 

The CrappyCaptian

 

 

[Flyer]

The Flyer reports only from a third party viewpoint. Why? Because he can….

 

 

Bronwyn Bishop appears as a m/cycle cop at post 19, so it was Palexxxx’s fault and Bigpete gets into it at post 20.

 

 

At post 86 Bishop changes to Bigjobs and I have to be careful not to cross the line as to why she’s called bigjobs. It is also revealed at post 86 that she comes from cactus island. ;)

 

 

At post 102 Guru Swami buggertherestofyouimallrightthanksjackgee patented an improbable drive that came about in post 101. :confused:

 

 

So, Guru Swami buggermetohismates has turned up because there might be more patents and bargain buys to be had.:big_grin:

 

 

Bronwyn Bigjobs we think might be a malingerer, claiming that she comes from cactus island but maybe really comes from the Riverland?:ah_oh:

 

 

The Guru Swami buggermetohismates and Bigjobs might be …:heart:….

 

 

The Flyer makes no comment on any involvement and rebukes and denies anything that anyone has ever said especially if it involves the Guru and Bigjobs…

 

 

 

[Admin]

Dear CrappyCaptian

 

It is with deep regret, disappointment, unhappiness, lament, remorsefulness, grief or bemoan that I must/am being brought into this den of iniquity, wickedness, sin, vice and injustice and be forced, strained, affected, obligated, enforced, mandatory or required to respond, react, act in response, or take action to deeply hurtful, upsetting, unkind, cruel, spiteful, cutting, wounding, insensitive, tactless and inappropriate allegations, claims, accusations, assertions and contentions against myself and any known, or unknown, words grouped or factored, pertaining to or subsequently not pertaining to, any thought of, considered, implied, claimed or asserted that myself is or has been involved, concerned with, caught up, mixed up or implicated in any form of impropriety with that person, being or individual known, recognised, identified or acknowledged as BigPete.

 

Now I forget what I was going to say

 

(the wonders of Microsoft Word and its Thesaurus) ;)

 

 

[Captain]

Dear CrappyCaptian ....It is with deep regret .....Now I forget what I was going to say

So Ian, based on your last post are we to assume you are off the fags again at the moment?

 

 

 

The NicabateCraptian (& I did mean Nica.........)

 

PS And having reread you post, I note that even you are denying any knowledge of any one or any thing remotely resembling a "BigPete" .............. and I'm not going to embarrass you further by asking if you have ever seen his "LittlePete".

 

 

 

[Admin]

Yep

 

 

 

[BigPete]

The Adventures of Pete'n'Pete

 

BigPete, LittlePete and YoungCharlie have had a brilliant weekend. :thumb_up: On Saturday the TwoPetes departed Echuca for a quick flight (before the weather turned to ) to do a few touch and go's at the Kyabram strip (right next to the golf course - can't miss it). Unfortunately :yuk: when they arrived over the strip it was occupied by a flock of sheep being escorted (we think) by the FriarPuk and the Riverland girl :ah_oh: in a 4 wheel drive.

 

After doing a few low passes (on the second pass the driver of the vehicle gave LowSlowPete a salute :confused: – (BigPete thought he was trying to tell him to go around one more time), they decided to go and have a look at "The Savannah Guys’" strip over at Tongala. The strip is only 400 meters long and about 30 meters wide, edged with tall trees, power lines at one end and barbed wire fence at the other.

 

After two low passes at half flap DecisivePete decided he could at least get the wheels on the deck and do a (very) quick touch and go. :thumb_up: The approach was spot on and CleverPete realized as the wheels hit the first rabbit warren (just over the fence) that he could actually land and stop before the end of the strip. So he did. What a buzz. :thumb_up: The owner, who had heard the fly over’s was there to greet him and was as chuffed as ProudPete was to see the JabiStorch sitting there on his strip (in one piece).

 

Now ApprehensivePete had to take off. :confused: As there was no wind, he elected to take off back over the fence as it was hard to see the power lines (and the concrete channel hidden by tall grass). :yuk: Making a mental note to send the owner of the strip a new set of mower blades, :ah_oh: UndauntedPete taxied as far as he could to the other end. The grass was around 8 to 12 inches high. Using his best short field take off technique (brakes on, half flap, stick right back, engine screaming at red line, mp3 player at full volume, (Candyman) :) 2 Hail Mary’s (AgnosticPete is not a catholic) - brakes off and awayyyyyyyyyy we go. Yehaaaaa!

 

Geez that bloody fence came up quick :black_eye: (although it was hard to see with all the grass clippings in the air) (and the JabiROO doing a good impression of its name) - OhMyGodPete (who briefly considered becoming a catholic) pulled back even harder on the stick and up, up and away, with the stall warning sounding like the trumpets of Jericho, :big_grin::big_grin: they departed. Man what a hoot, GungHoPete knew LittlePete was happy 'cause he was laughin' and cryin' at the same time. Yahoo!

 

As they headed back to Echuca EuphoricPete had the presence of mind to announce their triumphant return ;) "this 'ere is VictaPete, in the JabirooSlasher lookin' to come in and do a quick clippin' on 23/05, put the coffee on boys and warm up the edge trimmer".

 

When they landed BiggerThanLifePete was surprised to see what a lovely green colour the front of the aircraft was. :big_grin: Seemed such a pity to wash it.

 

LittlePalePete :yuk: decided he wanted to go home and do a few short ones on the FSX. So BigPete took him home and picked up YoungCharlie :heart::heart: (only 3 years old, but has PoppyPete just where he wants him!) to help wash the JabiBlue (Blue Grass - get it?).

 

As you've probably gathered, BigPete and LittlePete may not really exist, :ah_oh: (see crappy captain posts :broken_heart::broken_heart:) but - here's a photo of YoungCharlie :heart::heart: and the grass splatted Jabiru. :):)

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

 

 

 

[Captain]

............. so the question again needs to be asked - HAS ANYONE EVER ACTUALLY SEEN BIGPETE? 

 

(I know that Ian claims to have seen him at the last Natfly, but that is not a reliable sighting as Ian was off the fags at the time, so durry-less state was seeing PinkElephants .... as well as BigPetes)

"So" said the Craptian. "Not one single forum member has replied to confirm that GrandePierre really exists ...... NOT ONE ..... and not even his so-called mate Geoff1 in Mildewra has replied".

 

 

 

"And it looks like he thinks that a lengthy post about derring-doo, and cute little kiddies with buckets, will deflect our quest to know more about apparentlynonexistentPete".

 

 

 

"He thinks verbosity is a substitute for voracity" said the Skipper "But it was a good story that might also give that dopey Qld reporter more to write articles about old pharts being brave in little planes".

 

 

 

"And I notice that LargePedro deliberately omitted the rego numbers from his photos of the Jabi-Roo, so instead of asking whether anyone has ever actually seen humungousPete, I will subtly change the question to read DOES ANYONE KNOW THE IDENTITY OF THE BRAVE CROPPY PILOT WHO MASQUERADES AS GRANDEPIERRE?

 

 

 

 

 

PS ......... bloody entertaining report that, nobellauriatePete. I lifted up in my seat as you went back over the fence. Thanks 4 a good read.

 

 

 

[planedriver]

It would seem that GrandePierre, alias BigPete,etc;etc;etc; may a figment of our imagination, and the real Pete is actually dear little CharliePete who from photo 1, wets his pants at the mere thought of going for a ride in that Jabbygrassslasher.

 

The story posted, looks genuine enough on the face of it, but with reference to the remarks about KnackerlessPete, HopperlongPete, OneunglowPete and Cheating with a 100ydsstartonthevetPete, we naturally have a few suspicions.:confused::confused::confused:

 

Was this all a fabricated cover-up, for not wishing members to know that NotsomanlyPete had been to Melbourne for a "snip job" ,to allow MrsPete to stop worrying about those dates on her calender:question:

 

He'd need not worry, as there are plenty of members here that have keyrings with the logo : Vasecomy, no longer having to say "I'm Sorry".

 

Furthermore, at no stage did he mention that he'd been jogging.

 

However suspicious as we all may be, it was a lovely post, which only made it clear that PurportedlyinconsumatePoppyPete has not not been telling us the full story of his exploits;););)

 

The Craptain has been using such big words in his replies, that thesorusless members are unable to comment, as it takes so long to unravel his apparent superior interlect??!!**

 

For those with less than 4 stripes, with a percieved average IQ, lower than 238.4, they can always google some of the words in the Encyclopedia Britanica section link. www.whatthe****? (hell) does he mean?

 

Meanwhile, our givenupthefags?mentor, posts a photo with a sly one stuck behind his ear!!??!!??*** which just goes to prove..............................

 

 

[Guest Geoff1563861416]

Man that Big Pete is one CrazyPete :angry:I have walked that strip with CrazyPete :angry:you would have to get it WritePete:cool: to do that:off topic:

 

 

[Captain]

.............. so Geoff from Mildewraa has confirmed the existance of both SwashbucklingPete & STOLPete, and all is now well in the N.E.S.

 

So back to BronnyBigJobs, and the RiverlandSwami in a seethru silk thong with gold thread.

 

But hang on!

 

Could Geoff from the Riverland actually also be BigPete from the Riverland?

 

They both have a J160 and both stick up for each other, and both appear to be really erudite & nice blokes ... so it looks sussss.

 

Ian/Slarti - please check their itp's or iud's & sperm-count or whatever it is you check when people try to masquerade in the forum as somebody that they aren't, and help me expose BigPete for what he really is.

 

But I reckon that that's it. The riddle has been pretty well solved. BigGeoff is actually storytellerPete, and littleCharlie is PoppyGeoff's grandson, while LittlePete gets played with by GrandePiere on a regular basis.

 

And so with GreatbigGeoff going to Melbourne with Pete's missus on the 19th, SneakawayPete will be able to actually come to the SAAA do in Cowra with the rest of us, and bring the Riverland girl along for a weekend with the boyz.

 

Phew .... glad that's over.

 

 

[planedriver]

.............. Phew .... glad that's over.

Poor SherlockCaptain and his trusty bloodhound are totally exhausted after unravelling the mystery of Alias's's's's's's'Pete, and is considering early retirement.

 

Like the girl with the melons, he always get's his man.:thumb_up:

 

So embarrassed at finally being sprung, we now hear on the grapevine, that there's a grass-stained J160 which is being fitted with dark limmo tint on the windows, and the owner is doing a night VFR rating, so he'll be able to fly day ops, providing there's enough sunshine.

 

 

[Guest Geoff1563861416]

Providing there's enough sunshine where "The Savannah Guys’"strip is over at Tongala. The strip is only 400 meters long and about 30 meters wide, edged with tall trees, powelines at one end and barbed wire fence at the other. Can'treademGeoff (also known as Gunna to his mates as in: "One day I'm Gunna paint my Jabiroo") Could Geoff from the Riverland actually also be BigPete from the Riverland? No Crows hear are there SwashbucklingPete only Savannah’s well Big Pete has been known to play in a brass band and after landing on this strip, with no Balls on the power lines now we know where bigPete gets his name from.

 

 

 

[BigPete]

Sooooo - DoubtingThomasCrappyCaptain :broken_heart: - BigPete's stand up and be counted friend from Mildura :thumb_up: - StalwartGeoff, (a grower of the fine wine that the FriarPuk loves:heart: ) can, and does verify that BigPete and LittlePete do exist. :thumb_up::thumb_up: (No - he hasn't seen YoungCharlie, but two out of three aint bad!)

 

With both BigPete and TrueBlueGeoff attending 2007 Avalon Air Show, 2008 Narromine and the incredible and unbelievable NoHopeTown Fly In (who our fearless leader I'llSellMyGrandmotherIfItHelpsAviationIan :ah_oh: witnessed but does not recall???? ) efforts, who could doubt their being and bond ship in true ANZAC style? (geez I love those biscuits!) :big_grin::big_grin:

 

LoadHerToTheGillsGeoff also holds the world record for transporting grape product in his JabJuiceroo :thumb_up: (624 liters - it would have been more but hard work makes a pilot thirsty ;) ). When you consider that all this was done usually at night after a full day on the tractor (and half an evening on two or more bottles :clown: :yuk: ) it's hard to imagine a more dedicated grower/producer in the SunRaysia area. This may also explain why GunnaGeoff has not yet painted his PlainJainJabirue. :black_eye: Although it maybe also be that his piston broke.

 

And so, dear reader (we know you're out there), are you prepared to vote on whether BigPete (who can land on a sixpence:clap: ) and LittlePete (who has the knack of asking difficult questions during demanding maneuvers, (like landing on a sixpence)), do really exist. If you can tear yourself away Ian, can we do a poll??

 

thank you!

 

Spoken by BigPete, LargePierre, GrandePierre, HumungousPete, SwashbucklingPete, STOLPete, KnackerlessPete, HopperlongPete, OneunglowPete, NearlyKnackerlessPete, ScaredofScapelsPete, PastaPete, LowSlowPete, DecisivePete, CleverPete, ApprehensivePete, UndauntedPete, OhMyGodPete , GungHoPete, EuphoricPete, VictaPete, BiggerThanLifePete, and,

 

I'mTiredandGoingToBedPete. :raise_eyebrow::raise_eyebrow::raise_eyebrow:

 

So there.

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[planedriver]

And so, dear reader (we know you're out there), are you prepared to vote on whether BigPete (who can land on a sixpence:clap: ) and LittlePete (who has the knack of asking difficult questions during demanding maneuvers, (like landing on a sixpence)), do really exist. If you can tear yourself away Ian, can we do a poll??

 

thank you!

 

Spoken by BigPete, LargePierre, GrandePierre, HumungousPete, SwashbucklingPete, STOLPete, KnackerlessPete, HopperlongPete, OneunglowPete, NearlyKnackerlessPete, ScaredofScapelsPete, PastaPete, LowSlowPete, DecisivePete, CleverPete, ApprehensivePete, UndauntedPete, OhMyGodPete , GungHoPete, EuphoricPete, VictaPete, BiggerThanLifePete, and,

 

I'mTiredandGoingToBedPete. :raise_eyebrow::raise_eyebrow::raise_eyebrow:

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

With TwentythreealiasesPete managing to twist Ian's arm for the now in existance poll, one can't help but wonder whether the final analysis will show 23 too many ticks in the yes column:question::confused::confused::confused:

 

 

[planedriver]

SpoiltBratPete (alias No 24) who now has his very own personal poll, may possibly exist, but appears to be laying low, analysing the results.

 

Like a bad penny, i'm sure he'll turn up with some outragous explanation why he of all people, should be given preference over other mere mortals on this forum.

 

We no doubt all wait with baited breath, to see what comes up next.:thumb_up:thumb_down:chuffed:

 

 

[BigPete]

"over other mere mortals on this forum."

 

Wow - I Like it. :thumb_up::thumb_up:

 

SUPERPete - able to land over tall buildings (where's that sixpence/) and take off from short unmown strips),

 

SUPERPete - more powerful than a 747, ;)

 

SUPERPete - faster than a CT, MM and anything else! and,

 

SUPERPete - Who - when disguised as a mere mortal, (MundanePete) is able to stand for Truth, Justice and the Recreational Flying Way.

 

(dahh da da da dahhhhhhh, dah dah dahhhhhh, dah da da da dahhhhhhh, da dadahh,)

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[Guest palexxxx]

I can confirm that elusivePete exists. Here is a pic I took of him recently.

 

http://api.ning.com/files/H20-7X4WVa8hfe9NCTE4d*8B0O50jg-seYSli7LTSUA_/crazy_old_man.jpg

 

 

[BigPete]

That's the guy in the 4 wheel drive - I'd recognize that salute anywhere! :thumb_up::thumb_up:

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[planedriver]

Well, what more can one say?

 

It seems I possibly voted wrongly in the spoilt-brat personal Super-Sluth poll.

 

PaleXXXX obviously has better access to the "Rogues Gallery" than some of us, and managed to come up with one of ElusivePetes more flattering photo's "commuinicating"?, like Tom Cruise in the Top Gun movie. ( I think I might have seen him on the road today, saying hello in the same manner).

 

Bendorn also came up with "wanted, but not really known", or was that supposed to be "known, but not wanted":confused::confused::confused:

 

Anyway, it would seem that he is no longer listed as a missing person, as we know he's really out there somewhere, albeit hiding behind those tinted windows of his Jabbylimmo..

 

I just hope he does'nt walk up my driveway carrying a violin case:laugh:.