The Never Ending Story

[ahlocks]

zzzzz

There was movement in the forum, a rumble from bangholme way

 

About a fast ski boat, a long tow rope and that Turbo’s back to play...

 

 

McLock had desperately tried to rid himself of the rhyming verses that were coursing through his head. But he still had a ways to go… <blush>

 

 

“I’m even trying to cut down on smiley usage, to fall into line with The olde ways!” he added.

 

 

“Well, there be no more satire or wild tangents!” chided Tubz. “Strictly aviation discussions and old knock, knock riddles. And definitely no..….

 

===========

 

<sigh> guzzumped by TheGrin :big_grin:, for being too slow with a comeback....

 

 

[Guest Decca]

..............stirring the tubz either, just because it (looks like) he's asleep. Check the chat room tonight and make sure, on the video link, before we post anything snide, that he hasn't got something o...............

 

 

[Tomo]

...n the cooker" warned Decca

 

"No doubt he does" just waiting for the perfect moment to jump out and flood the nes with a...........

 

======

 

TheGrin is off to look at a Torana..... :big_grin:

 

 

[Tomo]

... deafening silence that is killing the Audience to such an extent that Ian's daily visits graph for Recflying, has decreased rapidly........

 

"We can't have that at all" says theGrin... "that would be..... bad, to say the least."

 

"Howabout we...err... come up with something worth story-izing.....?"

 

"Something we can stretch, make exciting, pick on people (nesser's only), an all that important stuff required to make a normal story a tall one....."

 

And so begins.....

 

The Commissioner of CASA was the first to arrive. His normally high colour was even more pronounced, and he was breathing heavily, in short gasps..........

 

 

[Guest Decca]

.......and asking more questions than anyone could answer.

 

"Has he gone to Calgary, for the high-speed luge? Has he gone to Echuca, for the high-speed ski-ing? Or has he taken up rustling Jabirus?" Asked the Commissioner.

 

"Prepare for a sea & air search, call out the Army, the Air Force AND the Navy. Get every available aircrcaft..........

 

 

[BigPete]

.."What all 10 of them asked the minister of Defence" :ah_oh:... because dear boys and girls that's all that's left thanks to Revin' Kruds :black_eye: spending money like it's just sand in the desert.

 

AND only four of them are ready to go as CRASA :confused: have not renewed the other pilots ASPIC cards. :devil:

 

But, fear not noble NES readers for a cunning plan is about to be released by.....

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[planedriver]

[quote=BigPete;171775

 

But]https://www.recreationalflying.com/xf2/uploads/emoticons/018_hug.gif.0182e32b48b2df8aaf412ac8488cf68a.gif[/img] for a cunning plan is about to be released by.....

 

....Young Tomo......who's full of bright ideas and sure to come up with something.

 

Word has is that he is going to just Drift along to The Easter Bun Fest at Temora (and bringing jam), and the Captain is aranging a couple of JATO's so he can keep up, as the ElRatto Escort Service kindly guides him to the appropriate field.

 

Otherwise, Tomo is just as likely to land in the middle of the finals of the local girls under 18's hockey comp:clap:, thinking he's already arrived in heaven:big_grin::thumb_up: where he figures he will be a star.

 

This news has caused some concern to our mate Pedro who is afraid the intentions of the young gun from up north. may distract the aviation integridy of his young co-pilot.

 

Deccadence, has volounteered his services to keep a very close eye on the young hockeylasses to keep the "riff raff" away, for which his dear wife has bought him an extra dark pair of welding goggles:cool: so he doesn't strain his eyes... or, waste that expensive oxygen in the cardiac-arrest-kit from over-excitement.

 

Meanwhile the cash-strapped Minister of Defence from the KRudd Disorganisation is left scratching his head, wondering how the hell he's ever.............

 

 

[hihosland]

Meanwhile the cash-strapped Minister of Defence from the KRudd Disorganisation is left scratching his head, wondering how the hell he's ever.............

 

manage to manouver the one almost operational Collins class vessel and the subrolla into the same pond thus diverting both of them from getting involved in the drifting FNQ invasion that is wending its surgeful way towards temora.

 

So far he has resisted one of his advisers who under the influence of a certain Nana ( not that there is anything wrong with that ! ) has proposed that he tempt the U25 NES folk away from their Drifter apps by allowing them to play with a tiger copter way out over the Simpson desert. His thinking being that that should ............

 

 

[BigPete]

.....things go badly pear shaped, the survivors could ride home on some of the millions of wild camels that live in the area. "Wow" thought little Kevy to himself, "millions of camels, :heart: we could give them the Simpson desert, :thumb_up: declare them as refugees and give them the right to vote :yuk: (for me, of course). I mean, if things get much tougher I can't rely on the millions of DONKEYS that voted me in last time. :hittinghead:

 

With his fail safe plan well in hand (as well as other things :ah_oh: (well in hand))Kruddy reached for the 'phone. I'll just call my spin doctor :star: to make a few plans.......

 

regards

 

 

[ahlocks]

..."You're on own Kruddy!" snapped the minister for tree hugs, old stuff and yarts. (1)

 

"They wan't to know how I can sleep while their beds are burning, burning"...

 

============

 

(1) Just in case it's too subtle.

 

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/garretts-50m-roofing-debacle/story-e6frg6n6-1225828979078

 

 

[planedriver]

With spin doctors spinning and planners a planning, a scruffy chick in dire need of a wash, emerged from her battered yellow combi and said "What about the wild buffalo? You can't not include them, co's thats da.... desc....diskcrimnation or whatever you call it, and thats no bull, they'll all get the hump".

 

Kruddy replied, " Ha Ha ha! :big_grin:my department of Vote Booster Advisers, possibly did'nt think of that scenario. I realise every vote counts, so it may be necessary to ban barbecues until after the next election, and just make do with a fair suck of the sauce bottle till then"

 

With regard to sleeping while your bed is burning. This should not be a major issue. Since coming to power, the Labour Party under my guidence, has pumped considerable funds into resoring some old 1950's Dennis Fire Trucks. with a fresh coat of red paint:artist:, I don't think it should represent too much of a threat at The Lodge:kboom:

 

 

[ahlocks]

...restoring some old 1950's Dennis Fire Trucks.

...McLock, not being someone who can let an opportunity for a wind up slip by (), reminisced :gerg: of the old Dennis fire trucks. :heart:

 

"Couldn't kill'em If you tried" he started. "The motors in 'em were as reliable as rotoraxes. As quick as a sportTzar, (heaps quicker, which wouldn't be hard , but this is a windup remember ;).) but they had Jabiru's brakes :devil:...

 

"you couldn't stop 'em straight if you tried."

 

Kruddies spin doctors quickly cottoned on to the political discussion gaining momentum :raise_eyebrow: among the NES community. "Tell Tree Hugger we've got an idea!"

 

"We'll flog the left over insulation off as airframe covering to the rag and tube mob! "We'll tell 'em that it'll put a bit of extra spark into their machines"...

 

===========

 

Politics, aviation and smilies...who'd have thought. :ne_nau:

 

 

[BigPete]

...and so it passed. Every rag and tube 'craft from Timbuctoo to beyound the black stump was recovered in the wonderfull shiny cladding. :thumb_up: (Fitted with NYLON clamps). With so many reflective planes in the sky UFO reports went thru the roof and the RAAF was busier than a one armed copper directing traffic.

 

But the biggest problem was suffered by the radar operators in all the control towers throughout the land. :yuk: Like a swarm of bees the rag and tuba's bought RPT traffic to a halt. :raise_eyebrow:

 

Geez, and me said little Kevy. Looks like I'll get the blame to this too, unless......

 

 

[planedriver]

We can convince that red-headed fish and chip fryer from Qld. to stay in Oz and barrack for me:question:.

 

Young Tomo is a neighbour, so maybe he can use his youthful powers of persuasion:hug:

 

Ahlocks was not at all happy about the situation. With great indignation he said "What Cr:censored:-p. Before we know it, all the rag and tube boys will be using Government sponsored cladding paid for by all the taxpayers, and get a free upgrade to a rivetless version of a StortsZaaaaaaaa.

[Bryon]

HELLOOOOOOOOO, is every NESser asleep?

 

Three days and no additions, what is happening???????:no no:I need my daily fix

 

 

[BigPete]

"Stand Clear" shouted Dr.Pete as he applied 200,000 volts to the hairy chest of the NES. "Lets see if we can get this story started......" :black_eye:

 

Meanwhile the rest of the band wondered where MusoPete had got to, :ah_oh: its a busy time here in Echuca during our Jazz/Swing festival.

 

Somewhere in the distance a large rodent :heart: is peering thru the windscreen wondering if he has enough rat juice to get him to.....

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[hihosland]

Somewhere in the distance a large rodent is peering thru the windscreen wondering if he has enough rat juice to get him to.....

 

where he despeRATely wanted to be since that time that Nana ( behind the back of the the riverland lass ) had challenged him to get ..........

 

 

[Tomo]

... lost... but because he has a GPS and a world map, he tried and tried to get lost, but to no avail. He kept looking out the window and seeing where he was... "this is useless" muttered the Rat, "how can the Nanna be so silly in suggesting I get lost?" "When I just can't"

 

"Ah yes, but wait till you come to the Queen's Land" said Tomo

 

"Thats a different story...........

 

============

 

Last night when I laid on my pillow

 

Last night when I slept on my bed

 

I slept with my feet out the window

 

And now all my neighbours are dead.

 

 

[hihosland]

"Ah yes, but wait till you come to the Queen's Land" said Tomo

 

"Thats a different story...........

 

But before we get to that different story here is an

 

Important announcement.

 

Henceforth it is to be mandatory for all RAA Pilots whilst in command of an RAA aircraft to wear at all times the RRA Current Certificate Compliance Cap

 

This cap to be issued in a new colour each registration year and will bear in letters big enough to be read at 20 paces the expiry date of the pilot’s certificate.

 

The board of RAA after prolonged and meaningful consultations with the department of homeland security have determined that this is the most appropriate action available to them to combat the increase in non compliance with pilot certificate currency requirements.

 

When the consultant’s report in exchange for $30,007.86 indicated that the system could be liable to manipulation by persons other than the registered owner of the Current RAA CAP a auto compliance component was added to the scheme for a mere $78.34 per Current RAA CAP per year.

 

This modification entails an inbedded DNA dector chip that will, on detecting, the scalp of other than the registered owner, cause the cap to spontaneously conflagrate.

 

When submitted to the OH&S consultants, they identified after only 7 months of serious consultation that a potential a potential hazard to persons was identified.

 

Consequently it has been determined that all wearers of a Current RAA CAP must also wear a fire resistant Nomex balaclava under their Current RAA CAP.

 

Your board confidently presents to you this scheme in the interest of safer, recreational flying.

 

All heil to the Current RAA CAP

 

 

[BigPete]

...unfortunately no allowance was made in the planning stage to combat those devious members i_dunno who like to wear the caps backwards. (We believe young Tomo (who is still attending elementary school) started this fashion and all the over 50's followed in quick succession less thay be labled old :yuk: and not bold :thumb_up: pilots). :big_grin:

 

Those dibber/dobbers observing all those Bold pilots became confused as to whether they were indeed flying forward :thumb_up: or was that backwards. thumb_down A state of total confusion/disorganisation hence followed and many would be dibber/dobber/doras had to undergo corrective/rehabilitation seminars.

 

Unfortunately these were held at CRASA HQ, and because they've been going backwards for years, could see no wrong in their new clients. (at $600 and hour).

 

In desperation, all the other "old" :ah_oh: (Cap forward) members appealed to the young Tomo to conform and changes his cap direction.

 

Here's what he had to say.......

 

regards

 

 

[MrH]

... In desperation, all the other "old" :ah_oh: (Cap forward) members appealed to the young Tomo to conform and changes his cap direction.

 

Here's what he had to say.......

 

regards

..."Sweet as, aye?.. but dude, that wouldn't look cooool,.... l8r" .. and off strolled TomYshouldI, jeans flopping around his knees. :DirtDOG:The rat thought to himself.......

 

 

[planedriver]

..."Sweet as, aye?.. but dude, that wouldn't look cooool,.... l8r" .. and off strolled TomYshouldI, jeans flopping around his knees. :DirtDOG:The rat thought to himself.......

Bugger the young-uns said The Rat, this is real serious business.

 

Whether they wear they wear their cap with the peak at the front, or the back, is not really the issue.

 

I'm not Really Rapt either way.:ah_oh:

 

Look said InsulationPete, I've got a heap of this foil insulation to off-load from the now defunkt Government Insulation Swindle.

 

Forget about having silly RAA stickers weighing your aircraft down, so the Gestapo can read your Rego at two hundred paces, and see if your RSL membership is up to date.

 

To get rid of this stuff, I suggest we make a rule that says----------Every RAAA pilot who's really "Fair Dinkum", should buy some of my inferior insulation foil and glue a stripe to the peak of their cap for every 20hrs, no, make that 10 hrs, they've flown (even on FlightSim counts), just to offload it at a small profit.

 

It may only be a small gesture of goodwill to some, (but it all counts in the popularity stakes) and for others with minimal hours, makes them feel like real pilots.:thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:

 

ElRatto felt Rat-trapped at this idea, but said nothing.

 

Tommo was gob-smacked at the thought of of being considered a young-un, with all this insulation on his cap as he struggled to to get his Drifter to release from the surly bounds of earth------"It's just like Nanna has jumped in the back seat with her lastest conquest"-----------

 

 

[Captain]

Meanwhile the cash-strapped Minister of Defence from the KRudd Disorganisation is left scratching his head, wondering how the hell he's ever.............manage to manouver the one almost operational Collins class vessel and the subrolla into the same pond thus diverting both of them from getting involved in the drifting FNQ invasion that is wending its surgeful way towards temora .............

"Don't worry about going to Temola this Easter" said Acki to Nobu "As after we have both kept the Sublolla going for all these months, it gave me the confidence to submit a tender to take over the Skippy Submaline Corpolation. We will lelocate it to F'n Qld to execute the contlact that I have signed with Mr Kevin Ludd where we are to have the Corrins crass Subs back on line in no time (contlactually by Aplil 7th).

 

"No Wuckers" lesponded Nobs "As we will bollow the Tubster's cold chissel & his 6 lb sredgie, AhRow's pop-livetter, BigPete's confidence, Dick-her's experience, HiHo's Victorian never-say-die attitude, MrH's abbleviations, Tomo boy-ish charm, and we will .................

 

 

[BigPete]

...we interupt this (NEwS program for an important message....

 

rumour has it that one time high wire act Starchy Nell :black_eye: and his compardres are planning (plotting ) to fast build a "Rock Hopper" aircraft at the up coming Annual Super Duper (if it's got wings, go fly it) :thumb_up: Gathering at TwoMoreRah (a famous outback town that was always up market because they had three horses). :ah_oh:

 

Starchy :black_eye: (who was aquitted of a recent charge of stealing electricty in his battery powerd Scorch (see NES way back)) was quoted as saying " if we can't bung this together with some gaffa and dental floss, then my names not McGyverStarchy:censored:StuffNell."

 

(a colourful character, our Starchy Nell)

 

CRASA :star: will be covertly overseeing the construction to make sure no funny stuff :roflmao:goes on (keep a look out for innocent looking people dressed in formal suits in 38 degree heat, i_dunno and drooling out of both side of their mouths ) (must be a drummer joke in there somewhere!!)

 

Now - back to our NEwS.....

 

regards

 

 

[Bryon]

... (must be a drummer joke in there somewhere!!)

 

Now - back to our NEwS.....

 

regards

WARNING....WARNING....WARNING....!!!!!!:DirtDOG:

 

Drummers are people too......... :drums:It is typical of the lower intellect classes (obviously a guitarist :guitarist: with too much time on his hands) to ridicule those of the superior class

 

Kindly desist and refrain in the future or the great god of music may smite thee:rilla::rilla::rilla::DJ::musicboohoo:

 

And now "Now - back to our NEwS....."