The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

.........."Cheque's in the mail, Planey" said Deccadence, slamming down the phone.

"I've got work to do" he muttered to himself, scrambling through the drawer in front of the mirror, looking for the eyebrow tweezers, nasal & ear hair remover, the moustache wax, and........

 

..... in his haste picked up the wrong bits, as he used eyebrow remover, nasal tweezers (oouuuch), and ear wax, however just as he started to reduce the size of his moustache Nanna called out of the ensuite "Leave that the way it is Dickher (Darling), as I like that little moustache of yours, and with your latest trim you look like ............

 

 

[planedriver]

you'll still tickle my nose, and give me the girly giggles when we kiss.:heart:

 

Originally Posted by Decca

 

.........."Cheque's in the mail, Planey" said, we'll call him Mr X (edited) slamming down the phone.

 

 

Planey tried to clear the cheque at the bank this morning Mr X, but it seemed to keep doing "touch & go's"

 

[Captain]

you'll still tickle my nose, and give me the girly giggles when we kiss.

 

..... because I'll be cacking about your lack of eyebrows, and thinking about what you are going to do with your .........

 

 

[planedriver]

..... because I'll be cacking about your lack of eyebrows, and thinking about what you are going to do with your .........

appearance?

 

"No worries there", came the reply, I have a pair of Groucho Mark's lookalike glasses I got at last years Royal Easter Show. The eyebrows are that bushy, that everyone will most likely think my name's John Howard :big_grin: How cools that:question:

 

 

[BigPete]

"...a bloody sight better than lookin' like little Kevy Crud" said a voice from the past, for it was none other than......

 

 

[Captain]

"...a bloody sight better than lookin' like little Kevy Crud" said a voice from the past, for it was none other than......

 

.... "but then again", thought a meloncholy Dickher "Neither Johnny H or Kevvy C have a proven reputation for pulling the chicks, so all I can do is hope that I look more like HandsomePete, or better still like Robin-of-Locksly in the photo Tomo took of him at Natfly, or perhaps a cross between Ian and Slarti (which might make me look like StanzaLegend) as they are all Lady Killers .....but then again, there is always ..................

 

 

[planedriver]

.... "but then again", thought a meloncholy Dickher "Neither Johnny H or Kevvy C have a proven reputation for pulling the chicks, so all I can do is hope that I look more like HandsomePete, or better still like Robin-of-Locksly in the photo Tomo took of him at Natfly, or perhaps a cross between Ian and Slarti (which might make me look like StanzaLegend) as they are all Lady Killers .....but then again, there is always ..................

This bloke, last to appear in the lady-killer contest line up, and possibly better forgotten.

 

Poor o'l 4 chinned PensionerPlaney who can still get a lot of affection from much younger blondes, and is very contented with that.:big_grin:

 

:wave:to all of you, that I have'nt had a chance to meet yet, especially to all you lovely ladies with dodgey mince pies, who have spare cash for the blue pills.;)

 

No props here like swanky smoking jackets, plucked eyebrows, or Errol Flynn moustaches, (though some needed as above), just a modest loving family man who is appreciated by one of the treasure's of his life, and hopefully by the judges.:thumb_up:thumb_down:broken_heart:.

 

 

 

[Captain]

This bloke, last to appear in the lady-killer contest line up, and possibly better forgotten.Poor o'l 4 chinned PensionerPlaney who can still get a lot of affection from much younger blondes, and is very contented with that.:big_grin:

 

:wave:to all of you, that I have'nt had a chance to meet yet, especially to all you lovely ladies with dodgey mince pies, who have spare cash for the blue pills.;)

 

No props here like swanky smoking jackets, plucked eyebrows, or Errol Flynn moustaches, (though some needed as above), just a modest loving family man who is appreciated by one of the treasure's of his life, and hopefully by the judges.:thumb_up:thumb_down:broken_heart:.

 

 

"What a pathetic story" thought the Rodent "Only 4 chins? .......... Almost all of us can beat that."

 

(Or was 4-chinned Planey perhaps using suggestive rhyming slang?)

 

"But what a lovely blonde lass that is in the photo" he added "That is either a gorgeous daughter for Planey or he will be known as "Lucky Alan" from here on, and ......

 

 

[Tomo]

"Takes after her mother at any rate" came a voice from down the hall...

 

 

[Captain]

"Takes after her mother at any rate" came a voice from down the hall...

 

 

"See what happens?" said my Aunt "When a photo of a lovely creature is posted on the NES. All the Tom(o)-Cats come out of the woodwork, with their smutty suggestive posts and their testosterone flowing. Now how am I going to stop Goldie and the (Im)Plann(t)er from making a nuisance of themselves, as happened with The Lass, her Nanna and latterly with DarkScar."

 

"However", my Aunt added "How about seeing if you can get Planey to come into the garden for a good time with Aunty?"

 

 

[ahlocks]

... "That is either a gorgeous daughter for Planey or he will be known as "Lucky Alan" from here on.....

"Eeh.. Eeh..." stuttered ditdah , mouth agape and eyes glazed over :face and heart: from seeing Planey's skite photo. "Eeh..."

 

"Vne! Climb rate! angle of attack!!...there's Matt Hall!!!" Locksley yelled loudly into ditDah's ear :uhoh2: to try to get him back to normal :ah_oh:.

 

"It's trick I tell you, there's no way that something so lovely :heart: could come from the loins of that rough looking head"

 

Planey grinned proudly (as he should :thumb_up:) He'd played an ace.

 

 

[Tomo]

angle of attack!!...

"Indeed, so should I come from out of the sun?", or..... "hey you" came the cry from...

 

 

[planedriver]

"Eeh.. Eeh..." stuttered ditdah , mouth agape and eyes glazed over :face and heart: from seeing Planey's skite photo. "Eeh..."

 

"It's trick I tell you, there's no way that something so lovely :heart: could come from the loins of that rough looking head"

 

Planey grinned proudly (as he should :thumb_up:) He'd played an ace.

Or was it, that we used to have our milk delivered to the doorstep in those days, he thought, and the randy miko needed paying, while Planey was normally at work:question:

 

 

[ahlocks]

Locks quickly jabbed a hot soldering iron into his mind's eye, as the thought of Planey 'paying' :raise_eyebrow: that randy Milko (not that there's anything wrong with that) would give him nightmares...:ah_oh:

 

DitDah started to rouse from his trance like state and his thoughts returned to matters of aviation. i_dunno:exclamation:

 

"I reckon she'd fit into a J120 with me :big_grin: and me mum :heart:, and we'd still be below MTOW :thumb_up:." he started to say,

 

but was quickly cut off by an electrical humming sound and raspy breathing........

 

"Geeze you blokes are thick!!" <breath> <breath>. "Can't you see past planey's distraction and tell what he's up too???!" warned DarkSabre....

 

 

[planedriver]

"Geeze you blokes are thick!!" <breath> <breath>. "Can't you see past planey's distraction and tell what he's up too???!" warned DarkSabre....

 

Reason: added a bait for someone who's notably absent lately

 

So if you want to attract a big catch, you need a big bait.

 

Lets see what we can do.

 

Could that be BigBiggles, BigEgo, Big (Dicca),or his charter pilot BigPete who's the Champion Murray Cod fly-fishing Champion from his Jabbyroo down The Murray.

 

"There's no fly's on that bloke" someone was heard to say, he simply zips his..............

 

 

[BigPete]

BigZipperPete is undone for the moment - but he will return. After all, someone has to keep you lot on the straight and narrow. :heart:

 

regards

 

 

[planedriver]

 

BigZipperPete is undone for the moment - but he will return. After all, someone has to keep you lot on the straight and narrow. :heart:

regards

 

With BigZipperPete threatening to keep us all in line, everyone buggered off for two whole days waiting, for the bold move of someone to break the ice.

 

The usual ratbags had been holding their breath, and were starting to go blue in the face

 

From the goodness of his heart:heart:Planey has organised to sent his friend, The Lovely Leslie, also blonde, (not the one in the photo) to BigPete's place, as she is an expert in replacing zippers, and turning up bottoms, and was panting at the opportunity to help the man.

 

"I'll fix him up for sure, and he'll be zipping around here in no time" she said.

 

There's obviously no fly's on that bloke at the moment.

 

The Locksmith was busy playing with his tumblers, which is a key part of his NES strategy, and DowntoearthPlaney was waiting with his trowel , in hand, waiting for the invite from Nanna to play in her garden.

 

The Captain had gone bush as in dreamtime, and Tomo was still trying to suss out some poor buggers 912 ignition problem i_dunnoin the hope that he could have a lend if it, once fixed:big_grin:.

 

 

[planedriver]

 

The Captain had gone bush as in dreamtime,:big_grin:.

However, today we have have some great news for you:big_grin:

 

The FUDA (Forums Undercover Detective Agency) have detected that The Captain is back :hug:from his dreamtime expedition (flaggons empty, possibly):yuk::yuk::yuk: and may soon re-appear and ban:hittinghead: those responsible for inactivity during his absence.

 

Could it be, that he has badly been missed:crying: and they are all lost without their leader:question:

 

 

[Captain]

However, today we have have some great news for you:big_grin:The FUDA (Forums Undercover Detective Agency) have detected that The Captain is back :hug:from his dreamtime expedition (flaggons empty, possibly):yuk::yuk::yuk: and may soon re-appear and ban:hittinghead: those responsible for inactivity during his absence.

 

Could it be, that he has badly been missed:crying: and they are all lost without their leader:question:

 

"Yes he is back" reported The Rat "For he has been away searching for a lovely blonde lady with equal class to the one that Planey flashed in the photo a few posts ago ..... but alas he has no success, for Darky told him what to do with his Box Brownie and all others approached went "Oh Yuck" when he smiled and that gold tooth glinted."

 

"Don't give up darling" said Nanna to El Skipper "Just give me a couple of days to get this blue rinse out and make it all blonde, and I'll ............

 

 

[planedriver]

"Yes he is back" Good!, Darky told him what to do with his Box Brownie and all others approached went "Oh Yuck" when he smiled and that gold tooth glinted."

"Why that's garbage" cried the chick at the back of the crowd.

 

If you marry him and he carks it, at least you know you can get a few bob for him at the scrap metal yard;), so he would'nt be a "dead loss" by any stretch of the imagination:big_grin:

 

(QUOTE)

 

"Don't give up darling" said Nanna to El Skipper "Just give me a couple of days to get this blue rinse out:yikes: and make it all blonde, and I'll ............(QUOTE)

 

......"make it up to you like I always have in the past.

 

DissapearingPete is not the only one I care about you know, and his customer with the suave smoking jacket, really knows his ropes, he's a good scout and there's always been a good bond between us:blush:

 

You're all very special when you get to my age"!

 

 

[Captain]

"You're all very special when you get to my age"!

 

"....... and I know from experience that he can 'go" all night" Nanna added.

 

"That's terrific" said Robin-of-Keycutter, who was really just a young punk and didn't understand such things.

 

"It is" replied Nanna "The only trouble is that he's continually a real 'goer' ....... to the can (not that there is anything wrong with that)."

 

"Erky Perky" replied Robin-of-WD40 (who charges $180 per service call to spray a lock with the magic fluid, open it [with your own key], and say "Who's a Clever boy then" with his hand out for a cashy). "If it was me I would ........

 

My Aunt says that she will ring Locksly in the morrow to talk about some serious Firey stuff.

 

 

[ahlocks]

"If it was me I would ........

....sell him a couple of cable ties, a tube of silicone, call it a Tink-L-ater kit and charge him $454.95 plus GST for it. (less for cash of course ;))" continued Rob'n O'Locksley :bmwrider:

 

"Are there side effects?" probed Nana. Concerned :raise_eyebrow:, yet excited :spruce_up: by the idea of her goer :heart: not errr, ...going as often.

 

"Well,..." i_dunno answered Locksley, it may not be just tears of joy that well up in his eyes".....

 

=================

 

If the ferals cease flammability testing early enough, the Aunt will get some serious answers around playlunch time...

 

 

[Captain]

....sell him a couple of cable ties, a tube of silicone, call it a Tink-L-ater kit and charge him $454.95 plus GST for it. (less for cash of course ;))" continued Rob'n O'Locksley :bmwrider:

"Are there side effects?" probed Nana. Concerned :raise_eyebrow:, yet excited :spruce_up: by the idea of her goer :heart: not errr, ...going as often.

 

"Well,..." i_dunno answered Locksley, it may not be just tears of joy that well up in his eyes".....

 

" ..... so just think of this as stretching exercises, which is good for those of you who are over 35." added Rob'em Lots'ly "However these are bladder stretching exercises."

 

"But, Rob'em, what if I pop?" responded the bloke who this is being written about (and identified about 5 or 15 posts back).

 

"Well" answered Rip'em-off "You'll just ..........

 

My Aunt will reward Rob'em beyond his wildest dreams.

 

 

[Tomo]

.....make a mess, so don't.

 

======

 

Ditdo is entertaining the Major this morning - and of course taking his lightwing for a fling... (he doesn't know yet though.....;)

 

 

 

[Captain]

"That is one of the anvantages of owning one of those fine Bundabergian machines with wing tanks, as you soon learn how to hold on for 5 hours if you like flying X-country." responded the Cheese Muncher.

 

"That's nothing" said Rob'n-'em (+ GST) "With my SportSzar I don't turn left (as mine is from the northern hemisphere, so we naturally veer right just like we dress on that side) and I can .......

 

My Aunt said "Come back Tubbo, All is forgiven".