ahlocks Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ...a pommy bulldawg for a trunk ornament. AHspeyed licked his wounds (because he could ) and plotted revenge :bruce_h4h:against rattus vulgaris :nonono:and turboTerrier:thumb down:.......() Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ...a pommy bulldawg for a trunk ornament. AHspeyed licked his wounds (because he could ) and plotted revenge :bruce_h4h:against rattus vulgaris :nonono:and turboTerrier:thumb down:.......() Until that point, of course, AHstud had somewhat prided himself on being told numerous times via sweet nothings in his ear "Oh Steve, you ARE an animal" ..... and he just hadn't previously considered that the lasses were referring to his dull coat, his matted tail, his one droopy ear and his .............. "AHspeyed licked his wounds (because he could )" and an elderly gentleman (even older than AHspeyed) was watching him lick his privates. "I wish I could do that" said the gentleman to his wife. "You had better pat him to make friends with him first" she replied "As it looks like he might bite". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 Until that point, of course, AHstud had somewhat prided himself on being told numerous times via sweet nothings in his ear "Oh Steve, you ARE an animal" ..... and he just hadn't previously considered that the lasses were referring to his dull coat, his matted tail, his one droopy ear and his .............. ....putrid odour. "Don't worry" said DarkDalmation, wagging her little tail which usually was propped up by a pillow, "I stink most of the time myself, and cficanpoint is REALLY on the nose!" "Well after all he IS from Tasmania" sighed MrHound........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 At which point Captain Chi Hua Hua interrupted with.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 At which point Captain Chi Hua Hua interrupted with.... ..with a blood curdling yelp! "Which one of you mongrels pee'd on my Jab" he whimpered , as he watched the stickers dissolve from its rudder. "Have to be something bloody tall to shoot that high! :uhoh2:" offered Daldmation. "A cross between a great dane and mongrel Qld cattle dog perhaps.." she continued as she turned accusingly toward..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryon Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ..with a blood curdling yelp! "Which one of you mongrels pee'd on my Jab" he whimpered , as he watched the stickers dissolve from its rudder. "Have to be something bloody tall to shoot that high! :uhoh2:" offered Daldmation. "A cross between a great dane and mongrel Qld cattle dog perhaps.." she continued as she turned accusingly toward..... .....Elratto, who sat there with a cheesy grin on his face and a drip tray at his feet "You dare to accuse me of such a foul deed" he cried "Why, I cant even........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 .....Elratto, who sat there with a cheesy grin on his face and a drip tray at his feet "You dare to accuse me of such a foul deed" he cried "Why, I cant even........ ".....Whippet" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 .....Elratto, who sat there with a cheesy grin on his face and a drip tray at his feet "You dare to accuse me of such a foul deed" he cried "Why, I cant even........ ...... usually get my fly undone before I do it anymore (old RAA member reference), so how can I shoot to such heights (aviation reference). Tubb had always lusted after AHound's SportStar, and a conversation was overheard ...... "Why do you have that 22 behind your back Tubb?" asked AHound (who was always the innocent naive pooch that we all know and love). "Don't worry about that, oh faithful AHound. Just come for a walk with me, down behind the shearing shed" was Turbs's reply. "Are we gunna hunt for wabbits?" asked AHmutt "And if so, why do you only have one bullet and an RAA rego transfer in your hand?". "Fear not, muttly" said the Bangeholme banger "I am just going to .................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ....give you a slight Winchester ear ache............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ....give you a slight Winchester ear ache............ ....... but first, just walk through this cow patt and then stick your paw-print on this bit of paper. It's nothing, really, just a ................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 ....... but first, just walk through this cow patt and then stick your paw-print on this bit of paper. It's nothing, really, just a ................ ".....formality....." "DON'T DO IT!" barked DarkStaffy waddling up, "I'm a lawyer" whereupon there ensued coughing, barking, ball scratching, bum sniffing, teeth baring, leg lifting and a few fights from the assembled pack - rather like a session of Parliament really. TomTerrier yapped "................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 TomTerrier yapped "................. What's that?..what's that?" They all heard it; what sounded like an effeminate machine gun. It was Slartibarkfast.............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryon Posted February 23, 2011 Share Posted February 23, 2011 What's that?..what's that?" They all heard it; what sounded like an effeminate machine gun. It was Slartibarkfast.............. ...who, with a quick mince of his slim hips and a bit of a woosie wave of his manicured hands said........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 .."Wazzup Dawgs?" :rilla: "Well..." AHhound began as he scratched at a persistent itch on the back of his ear. "..TurbDog found out that a .22 doesn't work on a skull that has thicken from years of chasing parked cars and is off to the vet to get the ricochet removed , and BirdDawgy found out that... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 .."Wazzup Dawgs?" :rilla: "Well..." AHhound began as he scratched at a persistent itch on the back of his ear. "..TurbDog found out that a .22 doesn't work on a skull that has thicken from years of chasing parked cars and is off to the vet to get the ricochet removed , and BirdDawgy found out that... "PlaneyPointer wasn't the innocent dog he always made himself out to be, after video emerged of a rendezvous with a little pup with dainty feet and a pink collar around her neck, from the dog pound" "The NES does my head in!" said cficanchewyerlegorf, but the other dogs all knew he couldn't read........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 ... but the other dogs all knew he couldn't read........ ...between the lines to discover the secret code buried within the names of birdDawgs list of shiny things. "Just take the third and fifth letter from the types listed and multiply it by the sum of the times 'I' is mentioned per message and then divide it by the number of 'RAA need medicals' cliches and then convert that result into letters and you get a new word. FIGJAM!!" 'splained CryptoLox. Poor CiFicanchewyourlegorf was a bit flummoxed by all this and even though he sort of followed the concept , he was puzzled by what the big deal about breakfast condiments was?... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryon Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 ...between the lines to discover the secret code buried within the names of birdDawgs list of shiny things. "Just take the third and fifth letter from the types listed and multiply it by the sum of the times 'I' is mentioned per message and then divide it by the number of 'RAA need medicals' cliches and then convert that result into letters and you get a new word. FIGJAM!!" 'splained CryptoLox. Poor CiFicanchewyourlegorf was a bit flummoxed by all this and even though he sort of followed the concept , he was puzzled by what the big deal about breakfast condiments was?... "I normally have honey on me porridge" he mused. "I wonder what FIGJAM tastes like and can we get it in MapofTassie?'.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryon Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 ...(leatherwood honey actually)... "Ooooooooh, I just knew someone would mention the leather gear" sighed Tubs as he fastened his studded collar :whip: "You know I like it when............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ahlocks Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 ...I think of those taswegians sitting on their milking stools extracting that honey... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 24, 2011 Share Posted February 24, 2011 ...I think of those taswegians sitting on their milking stools extracting that honey... ....one of the last States in the world to issue perpetual Licences for Bee Milkers. It's a bugger when they kick the bucket over tho, and even worse when they lift their tail just as you bend down to set it upright again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted February 26, 2011 Share Posted February 26, 2011 ....one of the last States in the world to issue perpetual Licences for Bee Milkers. It's a bugger when they kick the bucket over tho, and even worse when they lift their tail just as you bend down to set it upright again. "It's so hard to get their gender right, too" said cfi (Can't Find It) "As the males get real stroppy if you try it on them" he added (not that there is anything wrong with that). "I prefer TeaTree honey" said AHcocker "But they are a bugger to milk, too, as you .................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 26, 2011 Share Posted February 26, 2011 "It's so hard to get their gender right, too" said cfi (Can't Find It) "As the males get real stroppy if you try it on them" he added (not that there is anything wrong with that). "I prefer TeaTree honey" said AHcocker "But they are a bugger to milk, too, as you .................... "...tend to get *****les in your fingers and a nasty stain from the bark." There was the sound of what appeared to be an erratic AK47, and Slartibarkfast appeared on the scene all ***** and teeth. He was a German Shepherd. "What's he saying?" asked Captain Corgi, but no one could understand his language. "How about we tape him, then slow the recorder down?" suggested AHpoodle who was a tech head, and this worked. "RAUS! RAUS!" Slartibarkfast was saying, "Getten Ze Art off here. Ve hare haffing a poodle show in therty minuten, and yous are in the way" he'd lived in Queensland for a few years............... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bryon Posted February 26, 2011 Share Posted February 26, 2011 .....where he had upset a few of the locals Since the demise of Jo Bjelkedontyouworryaboutthatpetersen, they had not been allowed to tar and feather anyone, but............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted February 26, 2011 Share Posted February 26, 2011 .....where he had upset a few of the locals Since the demise of Jo Bjelkedontyouworryaboutthatpetersen, they had not been allowed to tar and feather anyone, but............. in Slartibark's case they were more than willing to make an exception Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted February 27, 2011 Share Posted February 27, 2011 they had not been allowed to tar and feather anyone, but ...... in Slartibark's case they were more than willing to make an exception ... as in FastBartiSlart's case they teathered and pharted (on) him. "I've never been so insulted" complained Slarti****blaster "But then again, I need to get out and about more often." "No wuckers, Sloppy" said AHlooks "You can just ..................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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