Captain Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Quote "You're a ROTTER" roared Foxhunter to Slarti. "In my day you would have been REPORTED for carrying on like that."Why there would have been an ENQUARY!" "Hey" said the learned Rodent, being erudite as usual "Isn't an Equerry a 2nd string royal bloke who looks after the horses and who does stuff to princesses (and some princes [not that there is anything wrong with that]) when they need a bit ............................ of a change?" "No" was the immediate reply from Bruce MacQuarie (of the Dictionary fame [or perhaps that should read "Dicktionary", as he is a bit of a lad, and liked to hang out with princesses too]) "You are referring to a .................
turboplanner Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Quote "Hey" said the learned Rodent, being erudite as usual "Isn't an Equerry a 2nd string royal bloke who looks after the horses and who does stuff to princesses (and some princes [not that there is anything wrong with that]) when they need a bit ............................ of a change?" "No" was the immediate reply from Bruce MacQuarie (of the Dictionary fame [or perhaps that should read "Dicktionary", as he is a bit of a lad, and liked to hang out with princesses too]) "You are referring to a ................. "Enquoiry" said Probationary Constable Dark Stitches, dropping the n as all the uneducated do "Oi'll have yew kneaow........"
Captain Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Quote "Enquoiry" said Probationary Constable Dark Stitches, dropping the n as all the uneducated do "Oi'll have yew kneaow........" .............. that I've done stuff with Princesses (& Princes). Does that mean that I am an enquiring equerry?" "Did someone say that you are making an Enquiry? What about? Not the accounts again? What? Who? Does someone want to know something? What? This is very disloyal? Bring on the secrecy provisions (which are not, at this time, in place, in this place), Hurry? Are all those 10,000 members really financial members?" "Keep your shirt on, Prezz" said the whalloper (and part time Equerry) "I was only asking about ..............
Tomo Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 Quote ...a five second perv on the Hamburger Chick at the Gumly Gumly Service Station. First to arrive at the Ratfly Ride Day Was Tomo, straight off the farm. "next time yous play a prectical joke on me so de dis here back wheels cum off, youses could get in wheeeeel deep trouble, straight from da farm" Said Tomo as he rubs the dirt from his face while getting up off the ground.
Captain Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Quote "next time yous play a prectical joke on me so de dis here back wheels cum off, youses could get in wheeeeel deep trouble, straight from da farm" Said Tomo as he rubs the dirt from his face while getting up off the ground. "Greeting Tomo ............. you sure do put the tree back in Country" said El Ratsack "And the correct spelling is "Come"" he added to help his Queensland compadre. "And if your rear (not that there is anything wrong with that) wheel cums off again, (and you become a genuine "tail dragger" like the kelpies do on the farm when you haven't wormed them) I suggest that you ............................
turboplanner Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Quote "Greeting Tomo ............. you sure do put the tree back in Country" said El Ratsack "And the correct spelling is "Come"" he added to help his Queensland compadre. "And if your rear (not that there is anything wrong with that) wheel cums off again, (and you become a genuine "tail dragger" like the kelpies do on the farm when you haven't wormed them) I suggest that you ............................ "....apply a teaspoon full of petrol to the affected area, and watch them run faster than a Concorde for the nearest water trough. This is also a good treatment for the Lethargic dog."
Captain Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Quote "....apply a teaspoon full of petrol to the affected area, and watch them run faster than a Concorde for the nearest water trough. This is also a good treatment for the Lethargic dog." ............. or a disfunctional Executive that is "basking", where a liberal application of AvGas would perhaps ........
turboplanner Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 .... galvanise them into action, any action......
turboplanner Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Petrol also works well with the the Coupled dog, but the treatment is more difficult due to access issues, particularly where the female runs under the house. In such cases a strong mix of lysol in a knapsack spray with the nozzle tuned to "laser" aimed at the pink bit often sets off such a display of floor board banging and aerobatics that it's surprising David Attenborough hasn't featured it using joist-cam
Captain Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Quote .... galvanise them into action, any action...... "What? Action? Who? Questions? Oh my goodnes! Books? Governance? Administration? Professionalism? Governance? Governance? Governance? ............ what is that?", asked the bloke with the .................
turboplanner Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote "What? Action? Who? Questions? Oh my goodnes! Books? Governance? Administration? Professionalism? Governance? Governance? Governance? ............ what is that?", asked the bloke with the ................. ....spanners tightening the through bolts. "What's all that crap, I only want to fly and I'd be more than happy to pay $650.00 in licence fees just to get the magazine and look at the ads"
Captain Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote ....spanners tightening the though bolts."What's all that crap, I only want to fly and I'd be more than happy to pay $650.00 in licence fees just to get the magazine and look at the ads" "While I assume that you 2 blokes are referring to aviation (aviation term) related matters, I would prefer to get back to inuendo (not that there is anything wrong with that) and hints of smut" Nobu said to Nanna and her granddaughter just as he ...............
turboplanner Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote "While I assume that you 2 blokes are referring to aviation (aviation term) related matters, I would prefer to get back to inuendo (not that there is anything wrong with that) and hints of smut" Nobu said to Nanna and her granddaughter just as he ............... .......was about to explain how no one cared in Japan either, they just wanted to eat sushi and take photos. "When emperor said we were going to Hawaii, we thought for holoiday and photographic session on Kalakaua Avenue" Nobu said "then all this bloody, and next we given fright trauining for take off but no randing" "Japanese rearn rifetime resson" he continued "always watch erected officials carefully".
Captain Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote .......was about to explain how no one cared in Japan either, they just wanted to eat sushi and take photos. "When emperor said we were going to Hawaii, we thought for holoiday and photographic session on Kalakaua Avenue" Nobu said "then all this bloody, and next we given fright trauining for take off but no randing""Japanese rearn rifetime resson" he continued "always watch erected officials carefully". ........... particurary when the honoulable tleasurer has just got the burret, and the honoulable Empelor is being ress than flank while he enacts the honoulable seclecy plovisions, which the lest of the popuration (and members) thought was .......................
turboplanner Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote ........... particurary when the honoulable tleasurer has just got the burret, and the honoulable Empelor is being ress than flank while he enacts the honoulable seclecy plovisions, which the lest of the popuration (and members) thought was ....................... "for popuration and members benefit, but now find for Emperor's benefit" "Confucious say" said Wing Chee from Xian who flew a drifter with a fine pitch prop to handle the heavy atmosphere of cigarette smoke and fried pork smoke over the city "man who fart in church sit in own pew" "He's starting to" said the Fakir.
Captain Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote "for popuration and members benefit, but now find for Emperor's benefit" "Confucious say" said Wing Chee from Xian who flew a drifter with a fine pitch prop to handle the heavy atmosphere of cigarette smoke and fried pork smoke over the city "man who fart in church sit in own pew" "He's starting to" said the Fakir. ..... who, you must all remember from a thousand posts ago, has a big hangar (aviation [and inuendo] term). The SeeFakir was SO proud and puffed out his chest until he got a cramp. "So do I" said Nobu, "And a........................
Bryon Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote ..... who, you must all remember from a thousand posts ago, has a big hangar (aviation [and inuendo] term). The SeeFakir was SO proud and puffed out his chest until he got a cramp. "So do I" said Nobu, "And a........................ ...sushi roll big enough to make any girl cry out.........
turboplanner Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote .. "does that contain any MSG?" Once again for the poor old Fakir, just when he was about to enter paradise someone had spoiled the moment. It was enough to make a man go back to his still in that hidden Tasmanian valley, where the Cowra escapees had cleaned up nearly all the jugs of moonshine.....
Captain Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote Once again for the poor old Fakir, just when he was about to enter paradise someone had spoiled the moment. It was enough to make a man go back to his still in that hidden Tasmanian valley, where the Cowra escapees had cleaned up nearly all the jugs of moonshine..... "Don't you wolly about that" said Acki, quoting Sir Joe (who he worked for a speech writer for 20 years) "We sure did crean up the moonshine. As a lesult, I'm as p#ssed as a pallot pecking pasparum, & as wobbry as a Rocksmith after a weekend on the nest, or as .....................
turboplanner Posted June 23, 2011 Posted June 23, 2011 Quote "Don't you wolly about that" said Acki, quoting Sir Joe (who he worked for a speech writer for 20 years) "We sure did crean up the moonshine. As a lesult, I'm as p#ssed as a pallot pecking pasparum, & as wobbry as a Rocksmith after a weekend on the nest, or as ..................... "landy as a lat sclatching his bors....."
Captain Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 Quote "landy as a lat sclatching his bors....." "Use great care with those particular words Tubb" said the MagnificentiMagesticoCastratiMastratiModerati "As that is exactly what Kitchener wrote in an innocent looking thread in a forum in 1899 ..... and look what happened?" "Spot on, MMCMM" said the Riverina Lass, who was a student of history "We immediately had the Vryheidsoorlog, which resulted in Breaker Morant copping it unjustly in the neck and all hell broke loose. If you sclatch any bors (particularly if they aren't your own), they really get the ...............
turboplanner Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 Quote "Use great care with those particular words Tubb" said the MagnificentiMagesticoCastratiMastratiModerati "As that is exactly what Kitchener wrote in an innocent looking thread in a forum in 1899 ..... and look what happened?" "Spot on, MMCMM" said the Riverina Lass, who was a student of history "We immediately had the Vryheidsoorlog, which resulted in Breaker Morant copping it unjustly in the neck and all hell broke loose. If you sclatch any bors (particularly if they aren't your own), they really get the ............... ".....irrits. Why, when I was on the Witwatersrand picking up diamonds from miners who'd picked them up from deep in the ground, and selling them to Cecil Rhodes, which is why I dorve a Benz when everyone else was riding horses....."
Bryon Posted June 24, 2011 Posted June 24, 2011 Quote ".....irrits. Why, when I was on the Witwatersrand picking up diamonds from miners who'd picked them up from deep in the ground, and selling them to Cecil Rhodes, which is why I dorve a Benz when everyone else was riding horses....." "....and I love the feel of leather" "Me too" chimed in Mavis "Me three" sighed Nana, much to the chagrin of.........
turboplanner Posted June 26, 2011 Posted June 26, 2011 Quote "....and I love the feel of leather""Me too" chimed in Mavis "Me three" sighed Nana, much to the chagrin of......... ....MrH who'd actually ridden in the lighthorse in the attack on Beersheeba after picking Boar bullets out of his teeth for weeks in a previous engagement. "It was the last great cavalry charge", he said " We started at a trot, then a canter, then a gallop. The Turkish shells were bursting all around us but we kept going, the ranks thinning, then suddenly an amazing change; the shells were falling behind us, the Turks couldn't lower the guns fast enough. Then a hail of bullets, but we galloped on, the ranks thinning again, but the bullets started flying over us, the Turks hadn't adjusted their sights, and then we were landing in the trenches and it was all over" "Think I'll have another beer" said the Fakir.
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