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The Never Ending Story


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  • 3 weeks later...

I'll be blowed, thought Pete as he sat at the laptop looking at where the NES had stagnated due to a comment about a household cleaning tool. Maybee I should have said it was a Bird....a Plane.... a....... but no! That was already done in the Superman stories. So what was actually out there? The Truth? But was'nt that already sort out in the X Files. Pete sat, his mind all hazy, or was that just the fumes eminating from the workshop? WHAT WAS OUT THERE???? Fear was starting to make itself felt! But fear of what? FEAR OF WHAT IS OUT THERE! Just what is it that has Pete leaving stains in his underclothes and a pool of sweat gathering on the floor beaneath his feet???023_drool.gif.d9ebe774dab24ff4699145182fd73e45.gif

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
I'll be blowed, thought Pete as he sat at the laptop looking at where the NES had stagnated due to a comment about a household cleaning tool. Maybee I should have said it was a Bird....a Plane.... a....... but no! That was already done in the Superman stories. So what was actually out there? The Truth? But was'nt that already sort out in the X Files. Pete sat, his mind all hazy, or was that just the fumes eminating from the workshop? WHAT WAS OUT THERE???? Fear was starting to make itself felt! But fear of what? FEAR OF WHAT IS OUT THERE! Just what is it that has Pete leaving stains in his underclothes and a pool of sweat gathering on the floor beaneath his feet???023_drool.gif.d9ebe774dab24ff4699145182fd73e45.gif

Because Pete came to realize that the broomstick was powered by a RotaryAxe. He was sad but still quietly confident that there was plenty of 2 -stroke in the fuel, after all, he stroked it pretty regularly while travelling X-country.

 

He commenced his pre-flight with the usual walk-around, checked the bristles, took out his feeler gauges to check the backlash, read the manual and asked Ahlocks "How do you fly these things? Should I sit astride this broomstick or do I stick it up my ...............

 

 

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..."Just make sure the carbies are balanced if you're gunna do that!" cautioned lox as he intercepted ProctologistRat's devious plan to turn Pete into a popsicle. "Otherwise the vibrations will....

...... make this one of the most popular recreational aircraft amongst the Oxford Street Set, or the Bangholme & Dandenong Dandies, or the Roma Romantics (not that there is anything wrong with that).

 

"Don't knock it if you havn't tried it" said Ahrocksoff, who stands up for all minorities (including Jab owners) "As an Axe strapped to a broomstick, when used by concenting adults on a Saturday sleep-in gave me a ....................

 

 

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...... make this one of the most popular recreational aircraft amongst the Oxford Street Set, or the Bangholme & Dandenong Dandies, or the Roma Romantics (not that there is anything wrong with that).

"Don't knock it if you havn't tried it" said Ahrocksoff, who stands up for all minorities (including Jab owners) "As an Axe strapped to a broomstick, when used by concenting adults on a Saturday sleep-in gave me a ....................

...series of aftershocks that rivalled the bawling of the Lollipop Lady down on Olympic Way.

 

 

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...series of aftershocks that rivalled the bawling of the Lollipop Lady down on Olympic Way.

"Don't talk to ME about aftershocks" said Ahlocks-shocks with a little embarrassment "As he donned his fluoru vest and his slip-slop-slap hat, then picked up his lollypop (which was actually an RAA approved broomstick with the bristles removed and a hexagonal piece of cardboard added).

 

"Wow, Loxie" said Tubb "You look fantastic ..... and rather attractive".

 

"Well" said Loxie "I perform lollypop type duties around this forum, so thought that I might as well ....................

 

 

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...mess up the day for the students as well as [Moderated Comment - doesn't make sense because the last five juicy posts have been deleted and I changed the wording in another three, and I think they should be called students]

 

 

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as well as guide you poor unfortunate rotaryaxe users in the way of the HIRTH. May the Force be with you.

"Don't talk to me about Hirth" responded AhRockoff "As I am more worried about Girth" as Ahlot had always been a bit of a beanpole, not to mention being anorexic (not that there is anything wrong with that)?

 

"I'm not anorexic" answered AhlOck "But I do use ULP in my Axe and that is anaerobic, while we all know that Victorians are ........

 

 

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"Mi Casa Su Casa mi chacho", said Turbo, who could use language when he needed to "I see you come from Toowoomba"

 

Under the NES Confidentiality Clause, which had been signed by the 84,000 NES Members we are not able to explain to you that Toowoomba has been short of a geography teacher for the last 40 years, so the locals have to refer to Other Places with names like FNQ, Brissie, and the Coast.

 

One of Turbo's mates in customs had noticed a large shipment of ex US Army Jerry Cans arrive, addressed to AH Loks, Waga Wagg, and marked "Hazerdus Goobs"

 

It seems that Loxy had travelled right through Arizona, Nevada and California trawling through Army Disposals for the Jerry Cans, and filling up with cheap mogas.

 

"He'll get a surprise when he starts to use it", said the Customs Man, "because...."

 

 

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Mexicans and run everything on tequila.

MODERATOR'S COMMENT - Given that both Pete & Bess are from Toowoomba, we are inclined to allow some leaway, as they probably know no better, but a strong line will be taken if they continue to use such derogatory terms, ......... as everyone knows that Mextorians from around Melbournistan drink Corona and wear big flat funny hats.

 

 

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MODERATORS COMMENT - If the Big Rat persists with implying that person from Toowoomba is a married couple, and therefore a Minority, I'll have to step in with the Political Correctness baton!

 

"We have to protect Minorities" posted Ted from Tamworth, scratching his moleskins, oblivious to the obvious inadvertent mistake made earlier.

 

"That's terrible, he should be banned" posted Windows 7

 

"Anyone going to the Grong Grong Fly- In this weekend" posted .......

 

 

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"We have to protect Minorities" posted Ted from Tamworth, scratching his moleskins, oblivious to the obvious inadvertent mistake made earlier.

"That's terrible, he should be banned" posted Windows 7

 

"Anyone going to the Grong Grong Fly- In this weekend" posted .......

....... Nobu, who had been calling it Glong Glong for 50 years and everyone had always assumed that he was referring to Wollonglong.

 

"And risten Ted" he added "Moleskin is the generic name for the cotton based material that is woven and then sheared to create a short soft pile on one side. You are not supposed to actually make 'em out of the skins of those tiny little things that live in english gardens. It must have taken 300 of the little buggers to make up those jeans of yours."

 

"I didn't make them" responded Ted "They are made in Two-Womb-baaaa as that part of FNQ is full of Moles, that ...................

 

 

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go to BNS balls and interfere with the circle work and ....

... before targetting any vehicle with a NSW, Victorian, South Australian (or even Tasmanian) number plate (but to mention SA may also be stretching the credibility, even of the NES).

 

"Get me out of here ..... eh" they would all say with those whistful, emploring, sad, Qld eyes. "We'll do anything to .......

 

 

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.. to escape from New Cape York."

 

"The name's Plisskin*, CiFI Plisskin." :cool_shades:hissed the leather clad stranger from Taswegia, "...and I'm here to save you from the clutches of F'nQld!" outback.gif.37ae6591c77843ddd99b24886b527dd8.gif

 

"Oh, is that a flight manual in your pocket?!" tittered Shazza giggle.gif.ad1278a6733e2c87a6f26c6d477d449a.gif, "..Or are you....."

 

*obscure reference to confuddle young'ns.. and probably a Taswegian.

 

 

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...just big assed?

 

We pause in our story here for two reasons:

 

(i) To reflect on the difficulty Loxie apparently had spelling "Cape", and sympathise with him - first A Rotaryax, now this!

 

(ii) In amazement at the almost exact likeness of the last emoticon to Ratso.

 

CiFi Plisskin wasn't amused at the comment of the Queenslander (they're really big those Queenslanders), didn't waste any time responding:

 

"I'll have you know that's my underpants" he said "and before you make any more jokes, I'll have you know I'm a Flying Ace, who can knife edge a Jab, even though it doesn't have enough power to knife edge."

 

"That's illegal" she snapped back.

 

"Tis Not" yelled Isaac who had been listening from a nearby dunny.

 

"Tis" she said

 

"Tisn't" he said

 

"Tis" she yelled

 

A moon face appeared from the bushes. "Did you call me my dear....."

 

 

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...just big assed?

We pause in our story here for two reasons:

 

(i) To reflect on the difficulty Loxie apparently had spelling "Cape", and sympathise with him - first A Rotaryax, now this!

 

(ii) In amazement at the almost exact likeness of the last emoticon to Ratso.

 

CiFi Plisskin wasn't amused at the comment of the Queenslander (they're really big those Queenslanders), didn't waste any time responding:

 

"I'll have you know that's my underpants" he said "and before you make any more jokes, I'll have you know I'm a Flying Ace, who can knife edge a Jab, even though it doesn't have enough power to knife edge."

 

"That's illegal" she snapped back.

 

"Tis Not" yelled Isaac who had been listening from a nearby dunny.

 

"Tis" she said

 

"Tisn't" he said

 

"Tis" she yelled

 

A moon face appeared from the bushes. "Did you call me my dear....."

... said Steve, for I have a runcible spoon just like the cat in the nursery rhyme and I am also the new President of the ...............

 

 

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........"Royal Aviation Association" and we're at WAR! he bellowed totally forgetting the vision of beauty before him (Isaac, not the BNS Bird who had a head like a robber's dog)

 

"Left Right, LEFT RIGHT, PICK UP YOUR STEP BLACKROD or you'll be doing push ups for.............."

 

 

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........"Royal Aviation Association" and we're at WAR! he bellowed totally forgetting the vision of beauty before him (Isaac, not the BNS Bird who had a head like a robber's dog)

"Left Right, LEFT RIGHT, PICK UP YOUR STEP BLACKROD or you'll be doing push ups for.............."

"What's wrong with my mellon" said Robert the Robber's Dog, who was indignant and lifted his leg to show that he was ............

 

 

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....fully functional.

No one took any notice, so he lifted it on the parade ground flagpole.......

..... which was also the earth stake for the electric fence that kept the students in, and it gave Robert a major shock, with 30,000 volts running up his stream.

 

"Who tuned the lights out?" yelled the Major.

 

"It were me, my old cobber" replied Robert "Are you Major Shock or Major Runcible?"

 

"I am the latter and my mates just call be "Spoony"" was the response.

 

"Can you renew my licence while I am here, or is that still a secret under the confidentiality provisions?" retorted Robert while rubing his still smouldering ......

 

 

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..... which was also the earth stake for the electric fence that kept the students in, and it gave Robert a major shock, with 30,000 volts running up his stream.

"Who tuned the lights out?" yelled the Major.

 

"It were me, my old cobber" replied Rober "Are you Major Shock or Major Runcible?"

 

"I am the latter and my mates just call be "Spoony"" was the response.

 

"Can you renew my licence while I am here, or is that still a secret under the confidentiality provisions?" retorted Robert while rubing his still smouldering ......

"Didnt anybody tell you that smoking wasnt good for your health" sneered Mavis

 

"Should I check to see if he can do the drawback?' asked Nana as she picked up two house bricks.......................

 

 

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