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Posted

"............the motorbike he used the the great escape. Not the film! not the film!, but the great escape from Kilmarney Castle the night Mary Queen of Scots dropped her guts".

 

"That's not very nice", said

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

The scotish people......lets confine her to her castle until whatever it is that she ate has been purged........ which was a great idea at teh time but after many years and the same stinking miasma and the random sounds of ....rrrrrrrrrrrpppp...... they said, this isnt working...The castles aged decades in only a few years...........what can we do.........

 

It was then that forbears of McBone, McRat and McDonalds came up with a cunning plan that required a McNobu......and I gota tell you McNobu's of Cowla are thin on the ground around castles in medieval Scotsland......but they found one anyway, still fighting WW0.01 for the Emporer. After briefing McNobu appropriately Mary managed to escape to the south back towards Elizabethsville........Elizabeth of Elizabethsville trusted Mary about as much as she enjoyed the pong........But after a few years of expecting it to fix itself she'd had enough and finally took to her throat with a thru bolt which like many cases of errant thru bolt proved to be .........

 

(As you can see I found some of that wacky weed you guys have been using... the words flow more potently and meaninglessly than ever :<)

 

 

Posted

.....decisive, and Mary lost interest and expired.

 

Elizabeth loves Roses so a referendum was held in Edinburgh is support of grey marriages...

 

 

Posted

ALERNATIVE STORY LINE .........

 

... and finally took to her throat with a thru bolt .......... which broke and therefore she was fine.

 

"I'm McFine" she said "But WTMcF does "miasma" mean Mc? (No wonder McAndy McSat didn't get on initially with McTubb and Mc Ratattat, because McAndy uses words that McRat had only seen in a Dicshonary when he looking up the word "Mishunary" and the related word ...............

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

...Now the religious leaders were all foaming at the mouth...grey marriages are abhorent and before you know it we'll descend to the levels of beeniality and we dont want any of the those boat beens here in Elizabethland its just a been means of avoiding the foreigner far queue ...if you must do that grey marriage thing then queens land on the otherside of this flat world is where you need to be.........Strewth cried McBone thats......

 

 

Posted

".....strewth.....that's.....streth, eh!" for he had no idea what Andy was coughing or harvouring for that matter.

 

"Is that a dirk in your sock?" asked Kirsty as McTurbett walked in, his short kilt flashing from side to side. He turned away in embarrassment and...

 

[Note to Moderator One (Turbo's Mate], Turbo has noticed a sublime blasphemy, not that there's anything wrong with that since a couple hours sitting in on a third form is likely to provide evidence that no matter what the present generation of parents thought up it would be a poor second to the fluent stream coming from the untouched lips of 14 Yo's, however said blasphemy was aimed at M1)

 

 

Posted
".....strewth.....that's.....streth, eh!" for he had no idea what Andy was coughing or harvouring for that matter."Is that a dirk in your sock?" asked Kirsty as McTurbett walked in, his short kilt flashing from side to side. He turned away in embarrassment and...

.... when she added "or are you just pleased to see me" he realised that she wasn't talking about Dirk Bogard (not that there is anything wrong with that).

 

But things worstened when he realised that the dirk she was referring to are a tiny little knife the size of small fingernail scissors, of tiny dimmensions and of particularly small diameter.

 

"What a blow to my McEsteem" said McTurdy "I need to McFind me a .......................

 

 

Posted

..........different description, but then he realised the the Rat may have misunderstood which was the utensil McTurbett had been referring to.

 

"I see McSlartifarty was carrying on down the street today" said McTurby "dressed in orange tartan, which was a bit hard on the......"

 

 

Posted
..........different description, but then he realised the the Rat may have misunderstood which was the utensil McTurbett had been referring to."I see McSlartifarty was carrying on down the street today" said McTurby "dressed in orange tartan, which was a bit hard on the......"

....... McSloppyPhartBlaster, but after all he is the laird of the clan McCitrus.

 

"Do nee cum near me" said Ross McSloppy to Allan McTurdy "As ..............

 

 

Posted

"....you are nay a descendent of the great Laird McSlartiflyfast McCitrus"

 

"E'll venture where it pleases me" replied McTurbo, but chose to step away from McCitrus who could be as savage as a bull, tearing up the ground when he had a Mormon Joystick in his hands.

 

"Well ye take the hee road, and E'll tak the low road" said ....

 

 

Posted

...McLox, who'd been busy getting the McTzara ready to recommence haranging WREX trainees after a lengthy furlough. 086_gaah.gif.bd4f7be6e18bc8fde14d9d10614ceb18.gif

 

"aigh buowt the onlah thung lower thun a raht's belly is a plunk of aluminium and rivets weeth rooted brakes!" complained McLox as he dabbed iodine on skinned knuckles and barked forehead. stretcher.gif.e6db89a1352782db0cab301f391c4ccf.gif "Eund tee top it all off, aye splattered sump oil down me trousers and look like eive wee'd meself!" 025_blush.gif.8e2ecc192cc98853ac4370dddcd7cf74.gif

 

"That's nuttin' " scoffed McAndySat 035_doh.gif.20945f41f6940e42c02c6776496d81c2.gif , "Eyve not been changing oil at all, but 'ave look at this......"

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

and he proceded to show them his teflon coated, friction free, but not pain free, form ready for the McAGM that started "we the 100 undersigned McMembers........"

 

He smuggly suggested that might ceate some more "eive wee'd meself!" crys on the McMorrow.........and little of it to do with skinned knuckles..........carefully the McTurbo suggested that counting ones McChickens befored they be McRoosted can lead to a bunch of McScrambled eggs before one expected and lots of other poorly mangled metaphores as well....Tiss true conceeded McAndyShat......but just in case I have a cunning stunt ready to pull out of my.........

 

 

Posted
..."That's nuttin' " scoffed McAndySat 035_doh.gif.20945f41f6940e42c02c6776496d81c2.gif , "Eyve not been changing oil at all, but 'ave look at this......"

.... stain that all my friends treat with disdain."

 

And just then, in the background they could again hear "Ye take the high road and I'll take the low road".

 

"Will someone shut up that GPS, as there was a faulty batch made by McGarment is Aberdean and all they do is speak in scotish platitudes".

 

"Give me freedom or give me death" said the GPS and then added "McAndy McSat is a ...............

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

at the 3rd exit on the McRoundabout......take the 3rd exit.......

 

McLoxy learned the McTzara over to a McBank angle that was bordeline aerobatic and borderline suicide in a McTzara and said.....what F****n McIdiot put Roudabouts up here.......... McRat snorted fire and said it seems that after the McAusfly where some cowboy Jabaroota flyers ignored everyone else that teh coroner on some guidance from the McRAA cleaner decided McRoundabouts will make it clearer for deranged fliers to know what they have to do when flying into the busiest airports in australia at a particular point in time........It seems that you can ignore radio but a McRoundabout at 120knots is a challenge that only the foolhardy will ignore....... MMmm Ok said McRat I guess that........

 

 

Posted

"........you are too fast for me McCoughs, even though I can read at 140 wpm" which was a rare concession from the rat who was usually so far up himself that he could clean his psorran with his....

 

 

Posted

From the left came the sound of heavy breathing and they all tentatively walked over.

 

"WHO ARE YEOU?" yelled McRat from behind McTurbo's kilt

 

"I knew we had raats at Tobruk," said McTurb, but I didn't realiose they always stayed at the back of the trench"

 

"i'm-bully-connolly-from-mcbone" came a wavering voice.....

 

 

Posted

...but before he could put the brush down a shot rang out.

 

McCough froze. "I think it came from down in the glen" he said

 

 

Posted

McTurbo was getting deeper and deeper into trouble after misreading the speed of posters McRat and McLoch Lomond, but he should gave realised they would fade fast. He'd diouble threaded and was trying to unravel himself but it was no use, there were now three story lines.....

 

 

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