The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

.......a copy of "Stamps for the Connoseur" written in 1728 and worth $150,000.00 - enough to buy him a Rotract engined anything."I don't get it" said Brine as he shoved a spitball down the Rat's pitot tube "why don't we...................."

..... all play a tune on these pitot tubes (Avreps) like the Pipes of Pan. After all, AhLot the Harlot is already dressed for the part and we can play the Beethoven Rectitude in C Major.

 

"Hold on your blokes (& blokettes)" said the CFakir "You can't call the Major a "C" and the entire Board certainly hasn't been guilty of any "rectitude".

 

Then the secret was revealed when a member of the leadership (sic) appeared before the IATA "We did it to get square with Ian Baker" he (or she) said, then added "When we couldn't block Eeen's Membership, we thought that we would stop the bugger thru not being able to re-register, and the fact that a few thousand others couldn't register either was a small price to pay."

 

"Geeeeez" said the bloke from IATA, who was also the CASA Inspector, a member of the Moderatti (but not yet elevated to a position of magnificence), and a member of the .............

 

My Aunt has just come in from reading the paper out in the garden, and has pointed out the article that reports that Australia's mission in Afganistan has been suspended, pending an audit to get the paperwork right. Apparently they had the Taliban registered as the CIA and the Bedlinen family were shown as owning a LSA that was based in Lightning Ridge.

 

 

[Bryon]

..... all play a tune on these pitot tubes (Avreps) like the Pipes of Pan. After all, AhLot the Harlot is already dressed for the part and we can play the Beethoven Rectitude in C Major.

"Hold on your blokes (& blokettes)" said the CFakir "You can't call the Major a "C" and the entire Board certainly hasn't been guilty of any "rectitude".

 

Then the secret was revealed when a member of the leadership (sic) appeared before the IATA "We did it to get square with Ian Baker" he (or she) said, then added "When we couldn't block Eeen's Membership, we thought that we would stop the bugger thru not being able to re-register, and the fact that a few thousand others couldn't register either was a small price to pay."

 

"Geeeeez" said the bloke from IATA, who was also the CASA Inspector, a member of the Moderatti (but not yet elevated to a position of magnificence), and a member of the .............

...Upper Qumbuckta West SES Search and Rescue Squad who had been trying to locate Eeen for months after his magnificent escape from the claws ("Craws, not craws" said Nobu) of infamy brought on by his brush with the leadership over a small matter of membership, "I didnt know he flew a ...............

 

 

[turboplanner]

"......747, what sort of Ultralight thingy is that?" he asked.

 

"It isn't" said Brine "and do you realise you've now grounded most of the world's airlines. is is a matter of safety?"

 

"Safety? On NO you silly thing" said the slighly effeminate member of the leadership (sic).

 

 

[Captain]

"......747, what sort of Ultralight thingy is that?" he asked."It isn't" said Brine "and do you realise you've now grounded most of the world's airlines. is is a matter of safety?"

 

"Safety? On NO you silly thing" said the slighly effeminate member of the leadership (sic).

Then the leadership (perk) realised that 747's were a shining example of the "new GA", and exactly what some members had been warning the AUF about for the past 20 years.

 

"You can't really compare a TyroneJack-a-Grillon with a 747, as they are sufficiently different to need to be in separate categories" said one of the original Rag-&-Tube guys.

 

"It's just natural evolution and we need to cater for them all ............. but we might need to move NatFly to somewhere with a longer strip (the next Natfly will actually be held beside the main runway (not the pissy little 2nd runway) at Sydney's Kingsford Smith, so members need to start to study the arrivals procedures about now)" said one of the progressives.

 

"I agree" said Ahlot "As a 747 is just a recycled beer-can, zackly like my SportyJauntyStar, both of which are much admired by the Bedlinen family, who ............

 

 

[turboplanner]

" know a thing about aircraft because they...........

 

 

[Captain]

" know a thing about aircraft because they...........

....... have a cunning plan, to ..............

 

 

[Bryon]

....... have a cunning plan, to ..............

to rid the world of those rotating thrashing flying machine thingies because the ejection seat only has a single use warranty and the insurance coverage that our illustrious leaders have negotiated only covers......

 

 

[Captain]

to rid the world of those rotating thrashing flying machine thingies because the ejection seat only has a single use warranty and the insurance coverage that our illustrious leaders have negotiated only covers......

..... ingrowing toenails and miscellaneous other claims below $0.89 (aggregate per year).

 

"It was a mistake" said the Maurie Minor "The leadership (chuck) will put it right, leave it with me, don't worry, it'll be OK ................ and it is only wooses that need both insurance AND registration, so grow up you NES maggots (the Maurie was getting a bit confident again after the shemozzle at HQ had been partly sorted, so he started to draft his next letter to Eeeen and.....................

 

 

[Captain]

AND SO, THE NES WENT NOWHERE, BECAUSE SOME OF THE REGULARS WERE HAVING TOO MUCH FUN IN OTHER THREADS.

 

"That's a disgrace" said Tizz "As I was hoping to contribute now that I am no longer so busy running the RAA and keeping it so firmly on the centreline (avref). I was hoping to take a leading roll in the NES and make yez all p*ss yezselves laughing (a Tizz Pizz (avref)) ................"

 

"But you have been a reading character" lepried Nobu, who was waiting for his sub 600 kg Zelo to be le-legistered before he ..................

 

 

[Bryon]

AND SO, THE NES WENT NOWHERE, BECAUSE SOME OF THE REGULARS WERE HAVING TOO MUCH FUN IN OTHER THREADS.

"That's a disgrace" said Tizz "As I was hoping to contribute now that I am no longer so busy running the RAA and keeping it so firmly on the centreline (avref). I was hoping to take a leading roll in the NES and make yez all p*ss yezselves laughing (a Tizz Pizz (avref)) ................"

 

"But you have been a reading character" lepried Nobu, who was waiting for his sub 600 kg Zelo to be le-legistered before he ..................

....re-enacted his gleat fright from Cowla to Woggle Woggle to escape the evil crutches of ..........

 

 

[Captain]

....re-enacted his gleat fright from Cowla to Woggle Woggle to escape the evil crutches of ..........

....... Nanna in her Arkayla outfit.

 

"And speaking of woggles, come over to Arkayla, show me your cute little woggle and we'll dib, dib, dib until the cows come home."

 

"I like ladies that wear dark brown and make me wear my old cub's cap." said Tubb, who had difficulty standing up straight .................. (he had a crook back.)

 

"Now hold on there" yelled Salty "As this is getting a bit weird (and close to the bone), because I was a cub and nobody ..................

 

 

[Bryon]

....... Nanna in her Arkayla outfit.

"And speaking of woggles, come over to Arkayla, show me your cute little woggle and we'll dib, dib, dib until the cows come home."

 

"I like ladies that wear dark brown and make me wear my old cub's cap." said Tubb, who had difficulty standing up straight .................. (he had a crook back.)

 

"Now hold on there" yelled Salty "As this is getting abit weird (and close to the bone), because I was a cub and nobody ..................

...warned me about Nanna and her leather outfit, let alone Turbz and his....

 

 

[Captain]

...warned me about Nanna and her leather outfit, let alone Turbz and his....

..... leather skin.

 

"But why haven't I been taken advantage off" lamented Bry-Nylon "I was a good looking kiddie that has turned into a stunning adult, and I have always made myself appear vulnerable, yet nobody has tried to crack onto me, except perhaps what might come out in the Royal Commission, about that incident with the Gazelle & the Texan, when I was Jab-bed by ...........

 

 

[Bryon]

..... leather skin.

"But why haven't I been taken advantage off" lamented Bry-Nylon "I was a good looking kiddie that has turned into a stunning adult, and I have always made myself appear vulnerable, yet nobody has tried to crack onto me, except perhaps what might come out in the Royal Commission, about that incident with the Gazelle & the Texan, when I was Jab-bed by ...........

...the smooth talking gentleman in a cassock and red funny shaped hat. Said his name was Cardi...or somefink like that.

 

Anyway, to cut a short story long, he said he was a Sky Pilot and flew recycled beer cans.

 

It was at this point that Revahlox interupted Brine's musing and said..............

 

 

[turboplanner]

...fireman's suit.....and Captain and his....

 

 

[Captain]

...fireman's suit.....and Captain and his....

...... RM Williams burka.

 

"How does this look with my Archbishop's mitre and bishop's hat thingy" he asked

 

"You look great (a mitre 10?)" replied Brine.

 

"Well come over here, young Bry-Nylon, & sit on Santa's knee. Is there any naughty stuff that you wish to confess?" councilled the Archbishop.

 

"Well" said Salty, blushing coyly "I did take off last week without putting my flaps down, and I went below 500 ft while joy-riding over Nanna's joint, I did a deliberate spin to see how much fun it is, and I .............

 

 

[turboplanner]

.....(in a hushed voice after a look around) spoke to a board member!....

 

 

[Captain]

.....(in a hushed voice after a look around) spoke to a board member!....

"Erky Perky" replied the Archy "Get off me you unclean boy"

 

"Don't worry Archi" said Brine reassuringly "As they didn't reply"

 

"That's alright then, situation normal then. And let me tell you, young Brine, that you'd be far better off speaking to Ahlot the Harlot (but don't go into a locked room with him ................. because he won't be able to get you out), as he is a card carrying member of the Moderatti Magnificenti, he knows all and has even more power of life-&-death than ................

 

 

[Captain]

And so, dear reader, this demonstrates that all you have to do in the NES is mention an Archbishop, a Royal Comission and Ahlot-the Harlot + a locked-room ................................... and all participants scurry for cover.

 

But which of these is the most scary ........ and what are the usual contibutors hiding?

 

Stay tuned ......................

 

 

[Captain]

Or was it the mention of deliberate spinning, and joy-riding below 500 ft that has them so introverted and guilt ridden?

 

Let us see, dear reader, who is the first to pop their heads out of their holes (not that there is anything wrong with that).

 

 

[turboplanner]

"Well" said Turbo, "I've just been out spining"

 

"I've been trying to find airfields below me" said Brine

 

"I" said Ahlot ".....................

 

 

[Guest Andys@coffs]

Andywrotethat was first (but not necessarily best) as he popped out from his dark cave.........Under his arm was a bunch of manuscript paper titled "A cunning plan and a new constitution" The manuscript was long and involved....until you got close and noted that all that was written on the first page under teh heading constitution was "Once upon a time....." and nothing else.....

 

Andy bemoaned the fact that coming up with a new constitution was brainhurting stuff and he wasnt sure that having started to play this game he wanted to continue......Maybe tyhose that just go fly have the right idea after all......until something goes wheels up...... Getting together with the Archbishop, a Royal Comission and Ahlot-the Harlot + a locked-room and deliberate spinning, and joy-riding below 500 ft at the same time was sure to be more much more fun than.........

 

EDIT: upon posting Andywrotethat noted that indeed he wasnt first but 2nd, curse that fast fingered tubaplayer.....Mavis raised an eye and said I can asure you his fingers arent as fast as one might like!!

 

 

[Captain]

Andywrotethat was first (but not necessarily best) as he popped out from his dark cave.........Under his arm was a bunch of manuscript paper titled "A cunning plan and a new constitution" The manuscript was long and involved....until you got close and noted that all that was written on the first page under teh heading constitution was "Once upon a time....." and nothing else.....

Andy bemoaned the fact that coming up with a new constitution was brainhurting stuff and he wasnt sure that having started to play this game he wanted to continue......Maybe tyhose that just go fly have the right idea after all......until something goes wheels up...... Getting together with the Archbishop, a Royal Comission and Ahlot-the Harlot + a locked-room and deliberate spinning, and joy-riding below 500 ft at the same time was sure to be more much more fun than.........

 

EDIT: upon posting Andywrotethat noted that indeed he wasnt first but 2nd, curse that fast fingered tubaplayer.....Mavis raised an eye and said I can asure you his fingers arent as fast as one might like!!

"Wow" said ElRatpoo when he examined AndySh@'s draft Constitution. "Have you written that on paper from the Olympics, as I can see the olympic rings as a watermark on the page."

 

"No Ratty, my observant associate" he replied "Those are the rings from schooner glasses when me and a few of the Group had a constitution drafting knees-up last night. And see this stain here? That's from ...................

 

 

[Guest Andys@coffs]

"No Ratty, my observant associate" he replied "Those are the rings from schooner glasses when me and a few of the Group had a constitution drafting knees-up last night. And see this stain here? That's ...................

A sign from God that either this Jihad against the five Rings is a good and wonderful thing that will fly me to paradise unless the jabiroota engine fails before we get there.......or it may be fly Sh!t on the paper......we cant quite make up our mind yet.....

 

That said, the Five rings we are going after may well be closely aligned but we think its a physical impossibility that they are interlinked....other than conceptually.......We do know that when they open their mouth out pops......

 

 

[Captain]

Andys@coffs' date=' post: 255329, member: 94[/email']]That said, the Five rings we are going after may well be closely aligned but we think its a physical impossibility that they are interlinked....other than conceptually.......We do know that when they open their mouth out pops......

..... platitudes, "don't blame me's" and "I inherited this's" ......... but not one fact or explanation.

 

"That's crap (RAA avref)" said Andysh@, who was back at the pub again and also getting a bit aggressive in his search for appropriate words for the new Consto.

 

"And I'm going to front up at the meeting too" said SloppyButtCrack "As my Cheetah is grounded, the thru-bolts are fine and I just want to go flying (AvRef)."

 

"Flying schmying" said the MiniMinor "This progressive grounding of aircraft that are unreasonably wanting to be reregistered (the computer problem ate our homework) is being done so that members can spend more time with their families. You'll all thank me for this in 9 months time when we will have about 13000 more little prospective members & potential GYFTS recipients. I will get an AO instead of just being called an A-Ole and there will be statues of me and Tizz outside the .............