The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

...........his file at the Secret Palace, where like a Tibetan Monastery, no one was allowed to tell anyone else anything.

 

So as much as Turbo smelled the Rat, he couldn't say so being limited to merely squeaking and trying to wag the whiskers in his freshly shaved face.

 

However this was enough for the Senior Monk who bellowed "................................

 

 

[Captain]

...........his file at the Secret Palace, where like a Tibetan Monastery, no one was allowed to tell anyone else anything.So as much as Turbo smelled the Rat, he couldn't say so being limited to merely squeaking and trying to wag the whiskers in his freshly shaved face.

 

However this was enough for the Senior Monk who bellowed "................................

"Stop smelling that Rat, Tinky Winky, as you never know where he has been"

 

"Sorry" said Tink.

 

And the Tibetan Monk added "And I'm buggered if I know how you can stand to put your nose there .................. but on the other hand, that Rat looks pretty hot, so he might make a good candidate for the next Dalai Lama. Please instruct the magnificent Loxy to built a cage and ..................

 

 

[Bandit12]

"Stop smelling that Rat, Tinky Winky, as you never know where he has been"

"Sorry" said Tink.

 

And the Tibetan Monk added "And I'm buggered if I know how you can stand to put your nose there .................. but on the other hand, that Rat looks pretty hot, so he might make a good candidate for the next Dalai Lama. Please instruct the magnificent Loxy to built a cage and ..................

.....to prepare to meet his maker, as we all know what happened to the slaves after they built the pyramids.

 

So the Lox hitched up his jocks, and cursed the T-Monk for being a pox. A quick scratch of his chafed buttocks, and the Lox reached for his.....

 

 

[Captain]

.....to prepare to meet his maker, as we all know what happened to the slaves after they built the pyramids.

So the Lox hitched up his jocks, and cursed the T-Monk for being a pox. A quick scratch of his chafed buttocks, and the Lox reached for his.....

...... registered and MasterLoxmiff supplied lock picks.

 

"What are these things" he aksed our heroic Rodent, who was stuck in the cage contemplating his navel and scratching his pills.

 

"I probably won't get out of here until this clown finishes his next tech course, or until all of the RAA problems are solved and it is running effectively. Oh, bugger, that's a life sentence on both counts." said Ratty.

 

"I can solve this" said Tinky Wink "As ............

 

 

[Bandit12]

...... registered and MasterLoxmiff supplied lock picks.

"What are these things" he aksed our heroic Rodent, who was stuck in the cage contemplating his navel and scratching his pills.

 

"I probably won't get out of here until this clown finishes his next tech course, or until all of the RAA problems are solved and it is running effectively. Oh, bugger, that's a life sentence on both counts." said Ratty.

 

"I can solve this" said Tinky Wink "As ............

....I have a friend who was once the personal assistant to the receptionist at CAHSAH. With contacts like these, I can take your case right to the top!".

 

"Argh" groaned the unwashed and smelly rodent "now I know I am stuffed. If only that Bandit of supreme length would come and save me"......

 

 

[Captain]

....I have a friend who was once the personal assistant to the receptionist at CAHSAH. With contacts like these, I can take your case right to the top!".

"Argh" groaned the unwashed and smelly rodent "now I know I am stuffed. If only that Bandit of supreme length would come and save me"......

..... as he (or she) (not that there is anything wrong with that) flies an Alpha 160, so obviously has (or had) a quid."

 

"Yum yum" said Nanna "Money and size, the perfect combination be it male or female, now if I could just get that delightful Rat out of AHchoo's clutches, and have dinner with Tink, have an affair with Salty and go up for weekends with Andysh@inhishat, a girl's life would be ..............

 

 

[Bandit12]

..... as he (or she) (not that there is anything wrong with that) flies an Alpha 160, so obviously has (or had) a quid."

"Yum yum" said Nanna "Money and size, the perfect combination be it male or female, now if I could just get that delightful Rat out of AHchoo's clutches, and have dinner with Tink, have an affair with Salty and go up for weekends with Andysh@inhishat, a girl's life would be ..............

...challenging, especially the bit with Andysodandy. Because weekends are already booked in with Bandit and his overpriced Alpha. "

 

Sadly, the Bandit could not provide Nanna with her flights to the moon and back, as the Alpha was strictly for looking and not touching. Disgusted, Nanna left Bandit crying pitifully in the corner, rushing to Andysodandy's open.....

 

 

[Captain]

...challenging, especially the bit with Andysodandy. Because weekends are already booked in with Bandit and his overpriced Alpha. "

Sadly, the Bandit could not provide Nanna with her flights to the moon and back, as the Alpha was strictly for looking and not touching. Disgusted, Nanna left Bandit crying pitifully in the corner, rushing to Andysodandy's open.....

...... cowl.

 

"Hang on Nanna" he said "I'm just checking the torque on my flywheel set-screws and then I'll give my thru-bolts & nuts a tweak, before I take you to heaven and back".

 

"Wow, that's good service."

 

"We have lots of good services up here in Coffs" said Andys@onhisthumb (dotcomdotau) as we lose a pensioner about every 45 seconds, but looking on the bright side, there are lots of boats and caravans available on the 2nd hand market in the Coffs daily rag, and I can ...............

 

 

[turboplanner]

"........a perch"

 

"PERCH!" screamed the Rat "Since when does a rat sit on a perch?"

 

"Lift your robe and look at your feet" said the Salted One, bowing graciously.

 

"OMG!............................"

 

 

[Bandit12]

"........a perch""PERCH!" screamed the Rat "Since when does a rat sit on a perch?"

 

"Lift your robe and look at your feet" said the Salted One, bowing graciously.

 

"OMG!............................"

...."I've got too many toes, and a bad case of tinea!" moaned Rodentus Ugliness. "I know just what you need" replied Old Salty. "Take a jar of Nanna's old......

 

 

[Captain]

...."I've got too many toes, and a bad case of tinea!" moaned Rodentus Ugliness. "I know just what you need" replied Old Salty. "Take a jar of Nanna's old......

..... toenails and grind them up before adding them to cheese."

 

"What's that good for?" asked Tink.

 

"Bait" replied the magnificent Rat.

 

"To catch what?" answered Tinky.

 

"PERCH" replied Ratty "As those buggers have wrecked our waterways, and they smell like .............

 

 

[turboplanner]

".....European Carpets."

 

"Are they the ones with the big mouths?" asked Plain Drivel, who had been sitting quietly trying to find an aviation term, when.....

 

 

[Captain]

".....European Carpets.""Are they the ones with the big mouths?" asked Plain Drivel, who had been sitting quietly trying to find an aviation term, when.....

..... it struck him that the most prevelent aviation term (AvRef) at the moment is "grounded".

 

"Hey Tink, how is that for ironic?" said Drivel "We are grounded (AvRef), there are no new aircraft (AvRef) coming onto the register, Salty has been pretty quiet lately, nobody has picked on the Harlot for a few posts, I hear that Andy has filled his hat, bull from bone is back home from the mines for Xmas and has been on the nest ever since, The Bandit12incher is proudly hanging out there, yet there is a ..............

 

PS - A rare portrait of Turbo is below:

 

 

 

[turboplanner]

......but the room had gone silent as they all tried to absorb the outrageous photo posted by the Rat.

 

Turbo protested that he had never carried a pink handbag in his LIFE (it was later established that the Rat had borrowed one of loxie's), but he realised that after a lifetime of possum skinning, some of it sticks.

 

"What was the bombshell dropped yesterday?" he asked.................................

 

 

[Captain]

......but the room had gone silent as they all tried to absorb the outrageous photo posted by the Rat.Turbo protested that he had never carried a pink handbag in his LIFE (it was later established that the Rat had borrowed one of loxie's), but he realised that after a lifetime of possum skinning, some of it sticks.

 

"What was the bombshell dropped yesterday?" he asked.................................

"Well" replied Ratty, the Tubby Turbo's friend & ally "When you look like that, is it any wonder that some members have trouble accepting your forensic accounting pronouncements?"

 

"I think Tink looks very attractive" said Eeen "And I might use him as the face of Recreational Flying, to attract more your pilots, and to ..............

 

 

[turboplanner]

"..............frighten off the three or four proon invaders we have at the moment."

 

"This is my moment" shouted Andyshatinhishatandcoughed "Now is the.......................................

 

 

[Bandit12]

"..............frighten off the three or four proon invaders we have at the moment.""This is my moment" shouted Andyshatinhishatandcoughed "Now is the.......................................

".....time to strike, while the iron is hot and my friend the Rat is digesting those prunes!".

 

Prunes are remarkable for digestive health, and the Purple Tink wondered whether he might also benefit from more regular bowel motions. "By jove!" exclaimed the Wet Tinkle, "I've got it! If they can't stomach my analysis, then what I need to do is......"

 

 

[Captain]

".....time to strike, while the iron is hot and my friend the Rat is digesting those prunes!".

Prunes are remarkable for digestive health, and the Purple Tink wondered whether he might also benefit from more regular bowel motions. "By jove!" exclaimed the Wet Tinkle, "I've got it! If they can't stomach my analysis, then what I need to do is......"

.... have Andy crap in my pink handbag, and then I'll .................................

 

 

[Bryon]

.... have Andy crap in my pink handbag, and then I'll .................................

...try and pass it off as Elrattos contribution to the discussion on the effectiveness of certain members of the RAAAAAUUUUS Executive team

 

"Do you think pink is the appropriate colour" said Nana, "It clashes with Ahroxoffs .......

 

 

[turboplanner]

..........lemon green braces.

 

But Roxoff was absorbed, getting ready to moderate the painted lady who...............

 

 

[Captain]

..........lemon green braces.But Roxoff was absorbed, getting ready to moderate the painted lady who...............

..... who he picked up outside the Gumley Servo on his way home from Gumly Public on his trike.

 

"G'day son ......... nice braces" she said in a voice that sounded exactly like a mix between Tom Waits & Lew Reed "How would you like a quick "moderate" around behind the shelter shed".

 

"Sorry maaam" replied Loxy "I'm going flying this arvo ........... if I'm not grounded".

 

"Wooowee" replied the Painted Lady "I've struck the jackpot, as I have cracked onto a rich flyboy, albeit riding his Dora the Explorer trike & with his Seseme Street bag over his shoulder."

 

"But I do have some Thomas the Tank-Engine condoms" replied Loxy, who didn't want to become Poxy again, "And we can .................

 

 

[Bandit12]

.....

"But I have some Big Bird or Ernie condoms" replied Loxy, who didn't want to become Poxy again, "And we can .................

"fill them up with water just in case the world ends soon. If it doesn't, I'll show you just what a good moderati can do with his..."

 

 

[Captain]

My Aunt, out in the garden, says that I should apologize to the 12"er, as I was still editing when you picked up that quote.

 

 

[bull]

Wow..................Sounds-like-you,all-been-eating-my-mushrooms--cried-Bull"""""""-lay-off-them-a-bit-Turdy-,,,they-have-nasty-side-affects.--you,ll-wake-up-with...................................................

 

 

[Tomo]

...three eyes and two noses, not to mention the toes...