The Never Ending Story

[hihosland]

whiteout??

 

 

[turboplanner]

CraftyPete wasn't about to get caught out by DevousCrapper's crafty blind alleys, and in retaliation decided to expose one of Wagga Wagga's best kept secrets.

 

He explained that Bega Cheese were going to shoot a new sequence for their latest ad, and were all set to have Riverland Lass standing in front of the water tower saying "And Wagga Wagga doesn't have Wagga Waggas" when another outbreak occurred and they had to cancel the shoot.

 

The relos recoiled in horror when he told them tales of Wagga Waggas migrating into motel rooms and biting with the intensity of a bindii.

 

He was a bit concerned that HiHosIcanlandoacowpat had also put him in a squeeze and promised to come down there and see who really could land.

 

There was a strange noise from round the corner and into view came La Crepe.....

 

 

[Captain]

There was a strange noise from round the corner and into view came La Crepe.....

.... La Crepe Suzette, the Crapper's sister.

 

"Can you give me an intro to GrandePierre" she asked her brother "As I want him to rub this GrandeMarnier off my ..........

 

 

[turboplanner]

derriere, le Chat is sitting en le matte, Comment vous?...

 

 

[hihosland]

derriere,

 

le Chat is sitting en le matte,

 

Comment vous voler dans un Jabby-magic-matte?

 

 

[turboplanner]

Le Jabbie en flien faster et with less noiuseau dans le stollandonacowpat n'est ce pas?

 

 

[BigPete]

You can say that again :thumb_up:

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[hihosland]

ne less noiuseau pas.

 

Le froggy avec 912 tres quietissimo

 

 

[turboplanner]

A oui, mais le froggy whine est la Humber Snipe diff.

 

 

[hihosland]

rolls over, feet in air laughing:laugh::big_grin:

 

whilst carefully avoiding the cow pat (trop noisome!!!)

 

 

[turboplanner]

Think we've frenched Le Capitaine out..

 

 

[hihosland]

mercy bow queue

 

 

[turboplanner]

Maybe they're busy with the three generations of Riverland women....

 

 

[turboplanner]

This is like trying to kick start a BSA Bantam...

 

 

[hihosland]

Riverland grandmother knows full well that you don't kick start a BSA Bantam.

 

You run like hell pushing the damned thing along with the clutch held tightly-in then when............

 

 

[ahlocks]

There hasn't been a 'bewdy, sheila or strewth" for several posts....:confused: not even a titty joke!!:ah_oh:

 

Got no idea what you're talking about.... :clown:

 

 

[BigPete]

...you think you're going fast enough, :thumb_up: you jump on, let go the clutch and.......

 

.....you do it all over again, :angry:and again, and again....

 

Nothing keeps a young bloke fit like owning a BSA.

 

regards

 

:big_grin:

 

 

[turboplanner]

Ah, we thought the mosquitoes had got you lot..

 

 

[ahlocks]

Nah, them thar b:censored:y locusts are having their second lift off....messy mongrels.

 

 

[BigPete]

A long, long time ago i_dunno when BigPete :big_grin: was just YoungAndPimplyPete (growing up in the Sunraysia District, Cardross, Red Cliffs and Mildura) lived on a vineyard and did indeed own a BSA Bantam. (150cc Major):heart::thumb_up:

 

Our next door neighbours also had BSA Bantams, (125cc) but their dad (who was ex-navy WWII engineer ) had doctored the little buggers (lightened flywheel, :thumb_up: bigger ports, shaved head, bigger carb and tuned exhaust) so they would do about 55 mph in second gear. We were lucky to see around 35 mph in top (third). :yuk:

 

The highlight of the year, however was a trip to my Uncles sheep station out behind Wentworth - where we worked our butts off - and had so much fun. ;) My uncle had a Honda 125, 2 cylinders, 4 stroke, 4 speed gearbox and ELECTRIC START. We loved it. :heart::heart::heart: (sigh). (oh, and yes the dog would sit on the petrol tank, while my uncle went off to move the sheep) .

 

We learned to ride, drive, shoot, fish, every thing sheepy, and to respect ourselves and others - so there. :big_grin:

 

regards

 

:big_grin::big_grin:

 

 

[turboplanner]

BSAYoungPete scraped the worst of the sheep dags from his fingernails and tucked into a hearty mutton and pickles sandwich.

 

Crutching was over, and he was looking forward to reading up on some of the local history down in the park; the story of the Fergy tractors in the 1956 floods, and the amazing history of Possum.

 

And, when it got dark at the caravan park, he'd kept plenty of bread to feed the real life possums. Just when you thought they were tame, the little pricks would scratch your hand off.

 

He didn't tell anyone, but like every other kid in the district he'd hung a bait on a springer, hoping for a Murray Cod in the morning.

 

It was almost as good as flying the Jaberwho (which he didn't know about yet because that was in the future).

 

As he walked along the river bank near the Cemetery, which some said was haunted (but it was just the parking spot of Riverland YoungMum), he thought he heard the sound of a lawnmower starting up. The sound persisted, and he thought it was a Victa, but maybe a bit bigger.

 

And then over the horizon came a Ride On Lawnmower suspended from an air mattress. He young mind went to Bernoulli, then he gave up trying to work out what it was.

 

There was a wave and a shout - It was.....

 

 

[hihosland]

....... Aerochute Kev, who'd been hired by

 

notasyet grandmother of Riverland Lass to spy and try

 

to prevent the backofthecemetery conception of RiverlandLass.

 

Kev truly had absolutely no interest in yet-to-grow-to-be-pilotPete.

 

Pete of course was not to know this and being thus scared whitless 'n

 

..itless by this apparition resolved never again to a perving-go on yet-to-be-mother-of-RiverlandLass and so diverted for ever-more his attentions to .............

 

 

[planedriver]

[quote="hihosland;74233

 

Pete of course was not to know this and being thus scared whitless 'n

 

..itless by this apparition resolved never again to a perving-go on yet-to-be-mother-of-RiverlandLass and so diverted for ever-more his attentions to .............

 

finding out more about the birds and the bees thingy.

 

YounginnocentPete"]

 

He'd had a grandstand view while hiding in the long grass, watching all the strange goings on with the Riverlandmum leaning against a gravestone.

 

When his mate enquired as to how old the Riverlandmum was? NownotsoinnocentPete replied "dunno, but I can tell you that the impressions lead me to think that her backside died in 1904"

 

The RiverlandLass grew up to be as ever popular as her Mum was:heart:, probably because it's always been in her jeans. hihosland and turboplanner are currently teaching be a bit of french.

 

As the years rolled by, young Peter initially studied to become a gynacologist, but later decided to become a motor mechanic. As a result of all his past training, he can now strip and overhaul a Jabbyroo engine without having to remove the cowlings, by working purely through the exhaust pipe.:thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:

 

Planey and his cousin once raced a Beeeza Bantam (mentioned in earlier posts) that would do close to 80MPH on the straight at Crystal Palace. It was balanced, shaved and ported head,etc; and the crankcase had cork araldited to the inside to increase the crankcase pressure.

 

It was based on the 175cc Bantam Super.

 

A couple of years earlier, we'd fitted a 500cc Machless motor to a canvas-covered canoe with outriggers which is probably still sitting on the bottom of The River Thames near Hampton Court. (No funniest home videos in those days).thumb_down

 

 

[hihosland]

Quote "As the years rolled by, young Peter initially studied to become a gynacologist, but later decided to become a motor mechanic. As a result of all his past training, he can now strip and overhaul a Jabbyroo engine without having to remove the cowlings, by working purely through the exhaust pipe.:thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:"

 

 

 

To riverlandLass Jabby-Gynie-Pete boasted "With enough of the right lubricant I can deliver a J120 from a J430"

 

 

 

Wide eyed in wonder RiverlandLass queries "Without any stritches?"

 

 

 

Responds Jabby-Gynie-Pete "...........

 

 

 

[BLA82]

we use lockwire these days says jabaPete, but not cheap stuff, we only use quality good from Clear Prop:thumb_up:. Suddenly Gynie Pete gets a call from Jabba HQ in Bundy. A j430 is in early Labour and his assistance is urgently required:chuffed: