The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

.........."WE'RE ASKING THE QUESTIONS HERE! and any more from you Mickey Mouse and we'll.............."

.......... give Pluto the ULP enema." (While all Pluto could think about was the mobile number of the dog-lover in Qld).

 

 

 

"Fair does" said Donald, who had just borrowed enough from his uncle Ludwig to put a hefty deposit down on a new King Air 350 that .......

 

 

[bull]

came equipped with custom made .................

 

 

[Guest Andys@coffs]

Tundra tyres......"those buggars from beech put those wussie little tyres on which stops me landing in the farm paddock.... But the Tundys should solve that problem! Be interesting to see what happens when we select gear up...."

 

Rat, who was known to be an officious little plick, from time to time, drew himself up to his full height and asked in an officious tone" have you fitted the aircraft grade tyre valve caps, cause.........."

 

P.s. Welcome back bull from bone.....not much has changed here, and we're going around that buoy for the 412th time so settle in and hunker down for some good old fnq bashing, but don't feel persecuted, we'll pick on all equal opportunity like!

 

 

[turboplanner]

"........the Supercheap ones are not as aerodynamic"

 

The Supercheap Marketing Manager was quick to respond: "There are two reasons we pit a 25 mm fluoro butterfly handle on them; firstly because most RA operators can't see their dinner on a plate without thick glasses, and secondly their hand shake so much that they drop standard valve caps trying to screw them on, and then they can't see.....you get the picture."

 

This set off a forty page thread of indignity which included people like Harriet saying they never used caps anyway, a number of exchanges about who was going to the Old Station fly in, three people asking whether they should put sump oil in with their fuel just for fun, and finishing with a debate on what the rule was for tying down at...."

 

Never mind bull, Hatso is always picking on Queenslanders, particularly F'nQueenslanders, but Turbo went through Coughs at Christmas time and can now tell you there are no vacant caravan sites, because of all the surfers on disability pensions, one fast food outlet, run by a past winner of MKR takes over two hours to serve fish and chips, and the big banana is rotten, having never been refrigerated.

 

 

[Guest Andys@coffs]

Donald's farm next to the 350 and would he feel threatened if they were to bring a duck repellent ,just in case, while thinking about screwing valve caps a duck, or a goose that flew in, cause there are enough of them about!, might feel the need to attack ones manhood, while reminiscing about the good......

 

 

[Captain]

......... income that Minnie brought in.

 

 

 

"I put her on a street corner in Moorabbin" said Ludwig "And she made enough to pay for the entire 350. She looked a treat in those big shoes."

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Who was her main customer in Moorabbin" asked Salty, cutting quickly to the chase.

 

 

 

"I know" replied Ludwig "As we had his credit card on speed dial. It was T.....................

 

 

[bull]

Turdy i think ,one of those southern plastic brigade members from that wet rainy place ,what was it called now.............

 

And hello to all again ,my tyrojackaroo thingy never got out of its trailer for rebuild ,so only been flying rc models until today as i,ve moved up to a sports parasol and she flies sweet,,yippee......................................................................

 

 

[turboplanner]

........................but-Turbo-had-staggered-back,-unable-to-follow-this-new-writing-style-of-midgevillebull-who-...........................

 

 

[bull]

Was trained by sir Nobu, so was a little bit backward on the correct way to write, but its been a while since ahlocks and turdy had been to the blue oyster bar so please excuse them as they know not what they say in times of stress but..........................ps the regulaters have removed my priveliges to use dash,s anymore ,not happy jan lol

 

 

[turboplanner]

"Why are you laughing bull?' asked Ratso "they took my complete dash away from me; best part of the Jab. I had to sell it to someone from Newcastle who uses it to keep finches and canaries..........."

 

 

[bull]

and they use the engine as a new anchor for the boat,,great anchor too said ahlocks stops the boat dead easy , but............

 

 

[Captain]

..... for Ahlox, "dropping the anchor" is a euphemism for ........

 

 

[bull]

copulation gyrations etc ,,,,,cried ratsak ,OH what,s that you saying about gyro stabilsation said Sir Nobu {back from the dead ,due to changes in the restoration allowances} and a bit deaf from the freezing proccess,,I,ll Tell you a story said Nobu .....Now the time was ................

 

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

 

 

[turboplanner]

......but the story hadn't even started when there was a comma attack. "Restoration, my .................."

 

 

[bull]

@%^&^^ said Ratsak . They just hooked him up to jumper leads and sprayed him with aerostart,,worked a treat but............

 

 

[turboplanner]

.......................his droppings were green for a month, which disconcerted the guests at Chez Ratso B&B to the extent that..............

 

 

[Captain]

.......................his droppings were green for a month, which disconcerted the guests at Chez Ratso B&B to the extent that..............

..... he was flooded with bookings from the Greens (who are actually a little red) and the "Wildwife Fund for Nature" who offered to send him a cuddly toy of his favoured WildWife in return for a donation to save the ..............

 

 

[Captain]

..... he was flooded with bookings from the Greens (who are actually a little red) and the "Wildwife Fund for Nature" who offered to send him a cuddly toy of his favoured WildWife in return for a donation to save the ..............

....... Wales.

 

 

 

"NS Wales, he means." said bull "And who wants to save that barren wasteland that is sandwiched between Mextoria and the Land de Queens.

 

 

 

"I agree" added Turbo with an aim to just be his usual helpful self "All you need to clean out NS Wales is a flame thrower and a ...........

 

 

[turboplanner]

"....bottle of Phenyle in case they turn back, and if this doesn't work, then......"

 

Phenyle

 

https://www.google.com.au/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#q=phenyle

 

 

[Captain]

"....bottle of Phenyle in case they turn back, and if this doesn't work, then......"

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..... we'll install a funnel for the phenyl and tunnel to insert the phenyl covered fennel (see below) into his ..................

 

 

 

 

[Captain]

........ because to have phenyl coated fennel shoved up your tunnel is a barrel of laughs.

 

 

 

"There is an idea for Comedy Night at the BOB" said Goldi-Locks "Just after Papa-Bear eats my ................

 

 

 

 

 

Steve "Moderatti Splendifferocci" Lox, in costume and taking the Goldi-Locks thing just a little too far.

 

 

[turboplanner]

...porridge" said Turbo who remembered his nursery rhymes well.

 

"I heard that Goldy Loxy was "displaying" on the corner of Bayliss St and Sturt Highway a couple of nights ago and a B Double ran off the road and through..............

 

 

[turboplanner]

.....a set of traffic lights next to the new Wagga Wagga Highway Filling Station.

 

Loxette had tendered for, and won the contract for new and exciting signwriting.................

 

 

 

[Captain]

............. because Goldie Lox had been "displaying" for a number of years (as an amateur who gave a freeby to anyone who asked) and he only really attracting occasional interest. You would know why if you ever saw him without his makeup on, like I have to each time we meet for coffee and cake.

 

 

 

Now I'm not saying that Loxy is a sl*t, or that he/she/it is even a Moderator of Loose Morals, but he did find that once lookers had some "skin in the game" (erky perky) he solicited (double erky perky) additional interest AND was able to earn some coin that was both GST and income tax free when he spent $4.70 to have the below sign made.

 

 

 

Then he added "It's just ................

 

 

 

 

 

[Captain]

........... but before he could say any more, TurdBro turned up in his Papa Bear costume and said "..............

 

TURBO HAD HAD A ROUGH NIGHT, BUT AT LEAST HE HAD PUT HIS DACKS AND TRUCKIES SINGLET BACK ON.