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Posted

Asicy card as the board of the club had decided to follow others examples and bring in............

 

 

Posted

.......... an affiliation with the "Another Silly Incident Card", or as Salty knows it, "Another Sick Insight ............

 

 

Posted
...MODERATED, you should not give Madge an opportunity because.......

.........he is such an elegant writer; original too, with humour to die for; probabily the best we've seen in.....

 

 

Posted

....... a Heliview or a heliotrope (The colour of Madge's eye-shadow and underwear NTTIAWWT and NTI'dKnow) or in ..............

 

 

Posted

....... he rolled (AvRef) upside-down (OftenDisasterousAvRef) with his undercarriage (AvRef) in the air (ReallyImportantToAviationAvRef) and made a low organpipe-like (MeteorRef) sound before .....

 

 

Posted

............oiling his spindle (ref applicable to air, sea and land, which should make planey happy, oh and space, for FT)to....................

 

 

Posted

....... remind Turbo of that very nasty incident during his involvement in the 1970's Russian space program, see below oil painting of Turdboy at that time, with Vladivostok in the background (he lived in the big joint on the water with Kim Philby), showing his usual supercilious 'Vette owner grin, doing his best impersonation of Uri Geller while uri.............

 

 

 

 

 

Posted
....... remind Turbo of that very nasty incident during his involvement in the 1970's Russian space program, see below oil painting of Turdboy at that time, with Vladivostok in the background (he lived in the big joint on the water with Kim Philby), showing his usual supercilious 'Vette owner grin, doing his best impersonation of Uri Geller while uri............. 

 

....was visiting the Good Ole US of A doing his impersonation of Hoges trying to "benda de bloody spoon" with Madge hovering (HeliRef) in.........

 

 

Posted

...........the rear trying to work out the trick.

 

Eventually they came to Sugartit, Kentucky, where Turbo had become famous many years ago when he skinned a bear with one hand, and..............

 

 

Posted

....... saying "These Koalas are too easy, eh?" (KevinBloodyWilsonRef).

 

 

 

The name of the town "Sugartit" fascinated Turbo during that period (*****Ref), perhaps in a manner that might now be considered unhealthy and may be the subject of some future Royal Commission, so Turbo took off his T-shirt to check for any sign of sucrose, but all he found was sure-grose.

 

 

 

Then it dawned on Tink that he was not in Kentucky at all (SillyLostTurboRef), but in South Carolina at Sugartit Speedway where Turbo had some expertise back in the Offenhauser days when .............

 

sugartit-speedway.jpg?w=195&h=146&crop=1

 

 

Posted

....an Offenhauser was an Offenhauser, and no one rode white Harley imitations, and beer was beer, and men were men, and..............

 

 

Posted

...... Tink had hair on his head instead of coming (NTTIAWWT) out of his ears.

 

 

 

"Those were the days" said Brine "I think I remember them well, now what were we talking about (OldPilotRef)?"

 

 

 

"Wasn't Hans Offenhauser that bloke in Hogan's heroes?" asked Eeeeeeeen, who had rejoined all of his mates on the NES.

 

 

 

"And wasn't Hogan a smarmy pr*ck?" said Ahlough, one of the few blokes on the Forum who could say "pr*ck" with impunity.

 

 

 

"Pr*ck, pr*ck, pr*ck" yelled Ford Prefect in defiance.

 

 

 

"Did someone call me" replied .............

 

 

Posted

.......Effie T, but no one had.

 

Meanwhile Turbo trudged on ever searching for the Grand Tetons where once he.......

 

 

Posted

........... had been seen trudging on via a hidden camera, see photo below.

 

 

 

However Turbs was not initially known as "BigFoot". He was first called "BigBum", or as the girls used to say, "Big..........

 

 

 

 

 

Posted

.......but there was a crash as the door to the NES opened and in rushed Don Quixote, almost beside himself with excitement.

 

"That's my Dad!"(Atheist thread ref) yelled Don, "I can tell by the sagging chest, oversize legs, and the look on his face!"

 

"And that's his party hat too!" he continued excitely

 

This stunned Ratso, who was always pouring sh!t on Turbo who was one of Australia's greatest philanthropists, and who...........

 

 

Posted

..... needs to be made aware that filling Anne on a casual basis doesn't actually make him a "philanthropist", but Donny Q already knew that and explained "......

 

 

Posted

"...........Not everyone knows that I have to spend three hours each day shaving, as a result of Darwin's theory, and that's a lot of cuts.

 

"If I forget to shave, the girls at MacDonalds won't serve me, and people stare at me at the......."

 

 

Posted

..... pool where I can still manage to crack onto lots of chicks, see below, although I also clog up the ...........

 

 

 

 

 

Posted

[in the interests of the families who see the NES as a haven of peace away from the open warfare of the general threads, Turbo wishes to advise that the above photo was simply Don Quixote being checked out by his family Doctor.

 

In fact the most significant part of the photo is that it shows what happens when Don Q hasn't had a shave for three or four days.]

 

".....shower drain worse than Turbo's daughter - and that's really saying something"

 

Regular and informed NES readers will know that often this story strays into the area of history, and has in the past brought to light some amazing facts, such as Turbo's clear photo of a snow leopard at Cardwell in Queensland, and parts of Rat's distasteful history.

 

Turbo had become increasingly interested in OMG's story on another thread about how someone had ratted (NTTIAWWT) his original 10-001 serial number plate,

 

and in trying to be helpful in solving this matter, Turbo journeyed up to the birthplace of Ultralights (not those stupid plastic thingys), which was only 2 hours 26 mins flying time in a Jab J160, and 1 hour 24 min in the Corvette, which Turbo chose to drive, only collecting 12 photo shots.

 

It was at Holbrook that an old Ultralight builder, sitting outside the Bakery (famous throughout the Riverina), told him that OMG was a BS artist, and the 10-001 plate not only belonged to Don Q, but that his Ultralight still existed, with a hole where the plate used to be.

 

Twenty minutes later, Turbo was out the back of the Museum, and snapped this photo of Donny's first building attempt. The old guy told Turbo it "had a terrible long takeoff run, but handled well." On the way out he managed to take a very quick snap of the monument to past Presidents, and then left for.................558242184_IMG_1085(600x450).jpg.97a91d61e7f078f0040e8d588803944a.jpg

 

1369967604_IMG_1083(600x450).jpg.68f41a6799fd56d4b46469cc268cd29d.jpg

 

 

Posted

.......... to have a couple of triple shot lattes & a toasted sanger at the restaurant next to the submarine.

 

 

 

High on caffeine and self importance, Turbs put on his Donny Q suit and had a quick crack at a couple of windmills just south of Goulburn, see security photo below, then moved on quickly to attack the ........

 

 

 

Posted

.....previous poster who mixed him up with Don Q, who is out there still, racing for the windmills and picking up the molls.

 

However the very well drawn sketch of the Chinese constructed wind turbines is very topical as Australia finds out that these ugly and noisy structures are NOT proliferating the landscapes because they are making money but because the likes of Kevin and Julia wanted a "sustainable" future and were prepared to put their hands in our pockets and spend our money to pay for it.

 

It seems that the companies involved have been buying the cheapest turbines from China, which makes the Chinese Government happy, enticing the landowners with a $10,000

 

per footprint payout, which makes the neighbours unhappy, mostly leaving the turbines idle, which doesn't worry anyone, selling the trickle of power to the grid, which doesn't make any difference, and collecting a handsome subsidy from us taxpayers, which makes them gazillionaires.

 

Turbo has to reluctantly admit, this leaves his Cat Farm for dead when it comes to.........

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

comparing VNE of one with the other. Is that TAS or CAS asked Salty? Turbo responded that his cat farm didn't have TAS

 

cf2baf8d5561fb404d495e43db93f975.jpg

 

and as far as he knew Kaz was wafting sowhere in her Auster...

 

Salty looked stunned as he tried to equate the answer against the question......but in any event Rat was quick to say

 

 

Posted

....."Never mind Salty, Hatso was always a tricky character, and he'll cop it for accusing KAZ (Avref registration) of wafting"

 

Don Q, who always manages to weave his latest purchase into the conversation asked innocently: "Would this have a VNE"

 

"only if ........................................................................................................"

 

Lawnmower.jpg.ee911b6f15f7e3e92a89c96297195cf8.jpg

 

 

Guest Andys@coffs
Posted

"one was to try clipping ones toenails, which because of the device requiring forward velocity and a modicum of control beyond that contained by mere aviators"! suggested the DAS Marty Skidalot! I'll get my Younger Man to consider if we nedd a CAO to control the VNE of the MPLM (Motorised Push Lawn Mower)"!

 

Mr Skidalot was considering the size of his non government and non controlled organisation, and how he would get ASA in on the act....."I believe these devices will be unsafe unless there is a manned control tower to....."

 

 

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