The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

.......Epaulet. “STAND TO ATTENTION”, he yelled. “......

 

[bull]

.to the fledgling pilots to get lined up for their first lesson  and...........                                                                                                                

Edited September 20, 2021 by bull

[turboplanner]

.........Epaulet picked one and said "Come with me"

Twenty minutes later they arrived back, the student ashen grey, saying "Yes Sir, No Sir" as appropriate to anything Epaulet said. He was being moulded into a shining example of skill and expertise that hadn't been seen since the days of the Biggles Flying School, which had taught Epaulet, and ..................

[Captain]

..... that meant that .....

Edited September 20, 2021 by Captain

[bull]

...............things would never be the same again [bit like covid] as Ahlox invited his rello over to be minister of aviation and the new minister for aviation Mr..Ahlox Ramsamy, [a distant rello of our beloved Ahlox]  Started a whole new rash of rules and regulation change.  My god said Turdo,these changes will totally change the structure of..............                                                                                             [His way forward for aviation ]

Edited September 21, 2021 by bull

[turboplanner]

.......our schools. Once you stand on 1,2,3 you're going nowhere and ...........

[bull]

.he had scrapped all requirements to be able to actually fly a plane and instructors where instructed to start getting geared up for the flood of Indian students who promptly after graduation would never go near a plane or india again and would disappear into the aussie culture and would have a cool chick magnet thingy [you know flash pilots licence ] to use at nightclubs after the taxi shift of course.....Now all this did not sit well with Cappy as he had..........                                              

[onetrack]

.....a major investment in an Indian-origin ride-share service, which was having problems with its drivers thinking they were flying an aircraft, when they were just driving a Kia. This led to a major exodus of passengers from the service and the shares went into freefall. Cappy said......

[bull]

well,,,who,s bright idea was that ! he said at the shareholders meeting of the IORSS...We will have to go back to hiring those pakistanies again !!   Hey OT do you still have   Abdul-Ali ,s phone number?  We need to........                                                                                                                                                                              [Abdul-Ali,Cappy,s best driver last year]What,s left after he had a bad landing.

 

Edited September 21, 2021 by bull

[Captain]

2 hours ago, bull said:

Hey OT do you still have   Abdul-Ali ,s phone number?  We need to.......

..... change the name of the ride service to Indian Special Insured Safety Co Ltd (ISIS Co Ltd).

 

"That may not work so well" was the comment from Trackbine Marketing who had been retained for advice.

 

"Well what about the All Queensland University Eating Deliveries Australia (AllQUEDA)" suggested Cappy who was a proven ideas man.

 

"That is a bit better" commented the Trackbine Marketing specialist who was 19 and had never heard of the Bed Linen family (or the 9th of November), and only .....

Edited September 21, 2021 by Captain

[bull]

after some reflection did Bull come up with Ali Bombers Delivery united limited  ,[ABDUL] and thought this should open up the middle east market . I,m not sure thats gunna work said ........

[turboplanner]

......OT whose family had had to deal with the Arabs of the West for several generations. "When you pick up the phone and call a cab, the last thing you need is a Camel"

Turbo quietly explained that to reduce global warming the constant emitting of CO2, methane and partly digested grass on the streets of the cities of the East had forced them to ban Camels, and replace them with Kias.

"All you can see these days in Western Sydney is Kias, Kias and Kias" said Turbo, and realised that once again his creative genius had produced a market winner and the KKK Taxi and Omnibus Service was created. Their tag line was "When you are in trouble, call the KKK", all the Abduls wore a white sheet and business boomed until.........................

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

Their tag line was "When you are in trouble, call the KKK", all the Abduls wore a white sheet and business boomed until..........

...... the company came under a 2-fold attack.

 

First, the other KKK filed suit in the Supreme Court (plus, they burnt a cross just for old times sake, beside the Clock Tower in downtown Perth ..... which also triggered support from 5000 undercover SA Apartheid supporters living in WA, but that is another story) claiming that they had a patent on the use of white sheets with the eyes cut out, and the 2nd was a commercial challenge because the Trackbine conglomerate never sit on their hands and under OT's dynamic leadership, they took over Hyundai in Korea and while there they also bought out Samsung (just because OT preferred the Android operating system, as he could never get his head around the Apple logic).

 

In addition to continuing to making 4 wheeled vehicles and electronics/white goods, OT cleverly merged the 2 companies and the resultant behemoth commenced making Hyusung motorcycles & Tuk Tuks for the working classes of WA in a disused warehouse in Peppermint Grove. 

 

The result of all this was that Little Ozzie Battlers (LOBs) like The Skipper, Eeeeeeeaan, The CT, bull and Salty could expect much ......

Edited September 21, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

...more competitition from the smooth talking execs, usually early 30s, shaved heads with sunnys superglued on, coloured suits and Android thumbs.

These were the people Nostradamus had forcast would take over the world; it was just the Android name which in 1387 didn't exist that made him think Androids were the name of these aliens.

They were trained by Turbine Marketing and when on the one hand a prospective customer received a pitch from one or these vs Een with six days growth, hair unkempt, teeth not brushes and a breath like a sewer exhaust, the result was a foregone conclusion.

Trackbine started kicking goals and the cash rolled in. OT annouced plans for weekly tour trips to the moon, and even hinted that it wouldn't be long before he would be building a RECREATIONAL AIRCRAFT. This brought gasps from the WreckFlineOldFarts (WFOF), but they quickly regrouped and within ten posts had conclusively proved that it couldn't be done, and if it was no one would be left to fly one and if there were, CASA would get him anyway or .............

[Captain]

HYUSUNG'S 5TH WHEELER TUK TUK IS VERY POPULAR WITH THE WA RELIGIOUS COMMUNITY.

HERE, RIDEN BY OT HIMSELF DURING THE PRESS LAUNCH.

 

FOR CREDIBILITY, OT USED TURBINE STRUCTURAL DESIGN FOR THE CALCULATIONS ON THE MAIN BEAM AND HOPED THAT THEY WOULD NOT CRACK LIKE HIS TRUCK DESIGNS DID.

Edited September 21, 2021 by Captain

[Captain]

11 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

CASA would get him anyway or .......

...... which they did with everyone else that expressed an interest in aviation.

 

Meanwhile Turbine Industries were wary of dealing with CASA so they took a safer route and opened several new ventures, being Turbine Red Fluoro Clothing, Turbine Protesters Inc, Turbine Rent-A-Crowd Pty Ltd, Turbine Police Riot Clothing, Turbine CFMEU PLC and what is expected to be a good money-spinner for the next year or so, Turbine Tear Gas Ltd.

 

Turbo issued Dan with 1,000,000 shares, just to say a belated "Thanks" and commenced .....

Edited September 21, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

........operations immediately with a popup Fluoro Mart on Westgate Bridge.

Turbo sent a complimentary fluoro yellow jacket to Dan and received a profuse, but slightly pandering thank you note wondering if he could have a SWAT one instead. Turbo flew it to Spring Street in his new US Army Backhawk which he'd just bought from Taliban Disposals, and offered him a .................

[Captain]

32 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo flew it to Spring Street in his new US Army Backhawk which he'd just bought from Taliban Disposals, and offered him a ......

.... a way out.

 

"Listen up Dan" said Turbo, with his usual obnoxious confidence that all NES readers will recognize "F the Belt & Road thingo. After spending many years integrally embedded deep in aviation politics, and Wreck Flying politics at that (the worst and most vicious kind ..... except for the SAAA), I can tell you that just dealing with China and Covid is a doddle, so here is what you have to do.

 

".....

Edited September 21, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....but before he could go on there was a rumbling and crashing and they staggered or balance. An earthquake had hit. Dan’s first thought was for the poor demonstrators strung out across Westgate Bridge. “I hope it falls down” he snarled and......

[onetrack]

....then, he suddenly realised, to his horror, that Parliament House had suffered more damage from the earthquake than Westgate Bridge had. He rushed to Parliament House to inspect the damage, only to find Turbine Demolitions were already inspecting the job, readying for a quote.

 

"Who called you?", Dan demanded. "I got a call from some anti-vax, construction trades protesters", said Turbo. "They asked me to arrange a quote for the demo of this place, and it had to be done quickly - even more so, if you were still in your office when it was being done, and they......

[bull]

.said you would take care of the bill and as we have already done priliminary scans and drawings our charge is already into the millions....... ..Will you be writing the cheque asked Turdo ,who has a very wary attitude to checks because of what cappy did to him last winter ,but we digest,,So at present rates you owe me $40 000000 to date and then there is the outsourced files and such which is an adminstering charge of $ 12000000,  So you owe me $52000000 today ,,and could you make that out to cash i,ve got a cash flow problem at the moment.and rates are set to rise soon so you had better lockin a contract today ah old mate? Dan turned to Turdo and ...............

 

[bull]

[Turbo ready for work]   .and slowly drew a breath, the redness in his face was a dead set clue to his lying and...............

Edited September 22, 2021 by bull

[Captain]

1 hour ago, bull said:

[Turbo ready for work]   .and slowly drew a breath, the redness in his face was a dead set clue to his lying and...............

... cheating natural persona.

 

"I think you are my match, Turdboy old mate" said Dan "How'd you like to be my Chief Health Office, Minister for Health and Minister for China, all in one gig, you can do that easy peasy and then ......

[bull]

.we can make Qweenswend look really silly ah ,,,said Chairman Dan, anyhow turdo me old mate ,wanna come for a trade [wink wink ] trip to china next month ? We could.........

Edited September 22, 2021 by bull

[turboplanner]

"...try their belts and roads."

Turbo knew something was wrong. "What are you talking funny Dan?" he asked, and Dan started blubbering that the fake Unionists were holding him to ransom. "I'll fix that" responded Turbo, and it won't cost you a thing.

The next morning as the thugs and disorganised rabble, all with brand new Fluoro jacks and shorts in their "union" disguise, were clustering in Elizabeth Street, a Convoy of Turbine Water Cannon Inc. riot trucks were hiding a couple of streets away.

Not many people know that before Elizabeth Street became a street it was called  Elizabeth Creek, which flowed quite steeply down to the Yarra.

We move now to the Premier's Office where Dan is sitting, teary eyed, when Turbo burst in unannounced "The protestors have gone" he announced. "Flushed em down Elizabeth St and choked them in the Yarra" he continued "and you know where the Yarra flows to?" "Tasmania" said Dan brightening up, and they ................