The Never Ending Story

[onetrack]

.....World League for Freedom and Democracy, who saw all these mandates as simply Communism and Fascism in a clever disguise. "These practices are cruel and outdated, and nothing more than a Communist plot to ensure that the population is easily separated into the two groups, with easily distinguished markings! This an outrageous demand, not based on personal needs and choices, and we will fight to the death to.........

[Captain]

..... ensure that oysters are .....

[turboplanner]

".....the primary instrument used in surgery, and for cutting out recreational aircraft templates, and shaving.

While this might seem tough it is another weapon we will use in the mission to save the world by reducing CO2."

A little boy was walking past and heard this. He said "Why would you go to that extreme? Why wouldn't you shut down that meat pie and broccoli factory spewing out CO2 across the road?"

And the people looking on also wondered..........

 

 

[onetrack]

....why anyone would even invent a meat pie with broccoli - and even more so - how many people would actually want to eat one? "It's a Victorian thing", said Cappy sagely. "You should see what they do with their meat and oysters, particularly when there's mandatory .....

[bull]

         ....... lockdowns, as the vitamins that people needed had    diminished   by "no trucks ,no transport ,no supplies ......                                                                                                                       

 So the frozen broccolli used in these famous local pies warded off infection and blindness for nearly the whole part of the lockdowns from the start     [except for the bit where we all got covid and shut for 2 weeks but that is another story]       .and so forth had collected a very high local regard and standing in the community ,,,..That is what made it all the more puzzlling when it was front page news the next day that...................

Edited October 2, 2021 by bull

[bull]

Shown Horse DNA found in frozen meat pies from the BAMP. ...  industry tests,revealed 47 have horse DNA. The FSA has asked Monolith to test the pie for bute, the veterinary drug used on horses and which is banned from food although said to be of "very low risk" to human consumers.19 July 2013

Edited October 2, 2021 by bull

[turboplanner]

........been eating horse meat and it had severely affected their judgement. Although the judgement of Tasmanians is erratic at the best of times, NES readers will have noticed what it has done to bull already.

 

The DNA results were also of concern to Turbine Catering who realised someone was adulterating their cat meat operation and the last thing they needed was someone deciding to test DNA for anything other than h

 

Turbine sold pies to all the airfields in Tasmania, and it was noticed in the northeast that the depth perception of pilots was failing and a lot of Ultralights needed new undercarriages. This progressed to ..........

[Captain]

...... many of them looking like Mr Ed and stamping their feet 4 times when asked about 2 + 2.

 

Those are the main disadvantages, however there were benefits due to advantages with their appendages, and that led to .......

 

A TYPICAL TASMANIAN ASIC CARD PHOTO (THE TASIC CARD)

Edited October 2, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....them becoming much better at wading, but having back problems when they tried to squeeze into a recreational aircraft [avref]. This also set off a demand for longer beds. Mainlanders know the pain of trying to sleep in the short Chinese beds sold by all the major outlets. Withing days Turbine Forests had set up a bed manufacturing operation in Burnie from logging to the finished product and long mattresses were ..........

[Captain]

5 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....them becoming much better at wading, but having back problems when they tried to squeeze into a recreational aircraft [avref]. This also set off a demand for longer beds. Mainlanders know the pain of trying to sleep in the short Chinese beds sold by all the major outlets. Withing days Turbine Forests had set up a bed manufacturing operation in Burnie from logging to the finished product and long mattresses were ..........

.... added into all the cheap motels that all the cheap AUF horse-headed pilots used around the Mathinna or Zehan TasFly sites.

 

But it was Turbine's Tazzy Saddles and Bridles PLC that made the unexpected big quid, because .......

Edited October 2, 2021 by Captain

[onetrack]

.......the pilots consuming the horse meat pies, now had long faces as a result, and this led to a vastly-increased demand for bridles and bits, which enabled better control of those pilots, when they became inclined to shy away from......

[Captain]

13 minutes ago, onetrack said:

.......the pilots consuming the horse meat pies, now had long faces as a result, and this led to a vastly-increased demand for bridles and bits, which enabled better control of those pilots, when they became inclined to shy away from......

..... snakes or plastic bottles, ........ just about any reference to CASA or regulation of any kind ....... or ............

Edited October 3, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

...CASAE (CASA Equestrian) which had been introduced for the ongoing control of Tasmania. There were ongoing disputes within CASAE about the proposed use of battery whips which could ...........

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

...CASAE (CASA Equestrian) which had been introduced for the ongoing control of Tasmania. There were ongoing disputes within CASAE about the proposed use of battery whips which could ...........

..... possibly become attractive to the over 70's kinkier (NTTIAWWT) members of the AUF (Tasmanian Branch). These members and those in the Wombat Appreciation Sub-Branch were very vocal once they learnt about the ......

 

MANY TASSY AUF MEMBERS CARRY ONE OF THESE IN THEIR AIRCRAFT (AVREF), FOR SELF USE IN CASE THEY ARE TIRED WHILE FLYING HOME .... OR JUST FOR FUN AT AN AUFT SOCIAL EVENT IF THE CWA GIRLS TURN UP.

Edited October 3, 2021 by Captain

[bull]

..exposure of their sub culture attached to the  (NTTIAWWT) ..and this brought down a ton of media attention. Ot was seen slyly taking off and departing the area with no radio call.   And Turbo was looking around like a trapped rabbit,and the rat had already climbed the fence and was gone.........The search lasted 12 day and finally...........

[Captain]

17 hours ago, bull said:

.The search lasted 12 day and finally.....

.... the three of them (OT, TUBB & RATTY - NTTIAWWT) were found, hitting the grog, legless yet bravely practicing their aviating skills by low flying under return earth lines (SWER) down near Lune River, where the ......

 

LUNE RIVER IS GENERALLY SIMILAR TO DARRAWEIT GUIM BUT

EVEN WORSE. AND THE RIVERS HAVE NOT YET BEEN BLESSED,

But there are heaps of wombats to use as targets.

Edited October 4, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

 

.........massacre of Grisly Creek occurred in 1876.

Grisly Creek is a small tributary of the Lune River near Wombat Park where Tasmanian Leopard Wombats once roamed.

As their name implies, they had beautiful pelts almost identical to a leopard's.

 

CT9000's great grandfather, CT8997 had a sheep property here called Blissful Valley, but he was a XXXX, and in one afternoon shot all the wombats, skinned them and sold the pelts to the British Aristocracy, who wouldn't know the difference between a Leopard and a tabby cat.

 

The Tasmanian Government found out and sentenced him to Deportation to the mainland, to the worst district they could think of, to wit, Darraweit Gwim, and condemned him, and any possible Issue to the job of shooting rabbits which were at plague proportion.

 

And so Grisly Creek became deserted, but on dark moonless nights .................

[Captain]

14 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

And so Grisly Creek became deserted, but on dark moonless nights ......

...... you can still here the spirit of old 8997, amongst the modern drunken partying and the replacement of another length of SWER wire, as it was Turbo that still had his old depth perception issue (DPI) which made it hard for him to ....... 

 

 

Edited October 4, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....see in the dark, but he'd been trained by Foxhunter in landing by ear, and he could perform a faultless landing in a ................

[CT9000]

........thruster by landing into wind which reduced the ground speed to zero then controlled the decent with power for a perfect vertical landing ......

[bull]

and after exiting the gemini he  swaggered over to the tea ladies  tent      [his "undercarraige " now having been restored by 7 plastic surgeons and over a million dollars..]       To see what talent was around and.................

Edited October 4, 2021 by bull

[onetrack]

......to see what gourmet delights the ladies had on offer. He sighted some meat dishes and asked politely what the meat content was. "Rabbit", said one of the ladies. "Horse", said another. "Tassie Tiger", said a third one. "Leopard Wombat", said a fourth one. "Tasmanian Stork" said a fifth one.

 

"They're all pulling your leg", said a sixth lady (the big buxom one). "There's no rabbits, horses, Tassie Tigers, Leopard Wombats or Tasmanian Storks left, in this neck of the woods, they all got shot to extinction by the CT Clan, who were notorious at shooting at anything that ran, hopped, crawled, or flew!"

 

"O.K.", said Turbo, stroking his chin thoughtfully. "I must say, the only Tasmanian Stork I've ever seen, was on an Apple box. But I'd still like to know what this mysterious-looking meat is?"

"We'll let you into a little local secret", said the big buxom lady. "We use the meat from..........

[Captain]

31 minutes ago, onetrack said:

"We'll let you into a little local secret", said the big buxom lady. "We use the meat from......

..... Koalas, as it is already infused with eucalypts and we don't need to add any spices. And speaking of spicing things up, I hear, dear Turbo, that after your botched circumcision with the oyster shell, you look like a Frill Necked Lizard, which is one of mine and the girl's favorite local animals, so give us a squizz and  .......

 

ONE OF TURBO'S SELF PORTRAITS

Edited October 4, 2021 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....she was about to continue with a disrespectful comment when Turbo reminded here that the diversity rules included females these days and she could get into a lot of trouble. The lady took her hands off him and turned her attention to bull, who used the sure-fire bait of his old state "My Jackaroo would be a goo ride for a girl like you eh!"

She looked at bull carefully. She'd always wanted to be a pilot and now was her opportunity, but what if he groped her in mid flight? Did the one weight up with the other. She decided she could handle bull, who had got religion since he arrived in Tasmania. It was a bad mistake, even in a Jackaroo.

The Tiny Ultralight sagged under the weight, and bull sagged under three quarters of it which had gravitated onto his side and was smothering him and the little motor pawed at the air.[avref]

Just as the fence loomed up it lifted off the ground.

As he said later, all bull was trying to do was ensure the controls were free and correct when he started to re-arrange the blubber, but when he picked a sensitive bit to shift ..................................

[bull]

the whole aircraft started to shake violently and there was an awefull moaning sound coming from the passenger,thinking she was in trouble he banked hard and landed.   Why did you stop cried the buxom one  ,i was almost there But alas was dissapointed again............at this point OT ,having seen what occurred in the air [and having a secret love of bbw,s] helped the lady from the aircraft and said ,,,madam if you would like to come over here i,ll take you fklying in my jabiru best ........                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   .[this happens nearly every time she lamented,never get across the finish line]

Edited October 4, 2021 by bull