The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

1 hour ago, CT9000 said:

......realization hit that a Victa is a lot more powerful than the Morry engine and will give lots of yaw control. Rotax is fine but the Ford V8 flat head is just a tad heavy for good W & B unless the pilot sits in the back. Brilliant opportunity for the five thousand dollar upgrade drawings for the engine options.....

.... but Cappy has very fond memories of his mate's Victa Air Tourer, except for the 10:1 fuel mix & the resultant smoke as well as the old grass clippings from when .....

Edited January 11, 2022 by Captain

[bull]

9 hours ago, Captain said:

All NESers should take note of the above, as this could be pretty handy because TSDF Majors:

• Can undertake marriage ceremonies, so that's a beauty if you need to show fake commitment if you get lucky as some Grab-a-Granny bar.
• Can override & countermand CASA FOIs and CFIs.
• Can get you into Wrest Point if you are just wearing thongs.

and don,t forget free use of the stations hack [f16] but getting turdo out of it was the problem....

[bull]

9 hours ago, Captain said:

.... but Cappy has very fond memories of his mate's Victa Air Tourer, except for the 10:1 fuel mix & the resultant smoke as well as the old grass clippings from when .....

Turbos zero steer mower broke down ,and we used the trusty victa ,remember that day Turbo ? That was the day that you..........................

[turboplanner]

......mowed down 32 trees after coming in for the mowing run in a 60 degree turn "because that's what the RA people do."

You missed the grass, but the trees were all neatly cut off at 50 mm, and mulced. The old Victa was one of the best aircraft ever built.

Of course you made up for it with a normal approach and trimmed it at bowling green height, then flew round the edges and cut the borders.

 

Turbo had tried to teach Cappy to fly it at one stage, but he was hopeless, kept pulling the "Cut" lever instead of the flap lever, and .........

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Captain]

31 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

mulced

Cappy is confused, which is unusual. Does Turbo mean to refer here to mulesed, as in trimming the trees around their empennages or does be mean mulched, as in "to apply a protective coating" like he does on that rash that never goes away? 

[turboplanner]

Turbo apologises for his Secretary's mistake, the word should have been "mulched" and notes she had a lucky escape elsewhere.

[Captain]

1 minute ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo apologises for his Secretary's mistake, the word should have been "mulched" and notes she had a lucky escape elsewhere.

Turbo's apology is accepted on behalf of the thousands of NESers, both domestic and overseas.

 

PS ... please send photo of the offending "Secretary".

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

Turbo had tried to teach Cappy to fly it at one stage, but he was hopeless, kept pulling the "Cut" lever instead of the flap lever, and .........

.... raising the cut lever at 500 ft AGL, so how can anybody be expected to run an aerial (avref) lawn cutting business when ......

[turboplanner]

WDIta.jfif

Edited January 11, 2022 by turboplanner

[turboplanner]

.......that leaves the lawns 500' high, and ..............

[CT9000]

......provides a compelling reason to purchase one of the new generation hackalopters. These wonderful machines when used upside down can cut grass or trees to the normally accepted height of two inches. On top of the five thousand dollar drawing upgrade for engine options there is also the mandatory drawing upgrade for the mirror when used for grass cutting, also the mandatory seat belt drawing upgrade........

[CT9000]

.......although there appears to be some resistance to the seat belt upgrade this is mandatory when operating upside down due to the fact that this operation may at times require hands on controls and therefore not hanging on may result in blade damage due to bone contact, also blood may not wash off a hot engine very easily ..... 

[turboplanner]

....and any body parts hanging down could be severely chopped limiting the number of people keen to fly a hackalopter upside down, particularly ..................

[bull]

.as the accident rate was climbing and this did not go well with the insurance companies. Now the Hackalopters operators where a pretty resilient bunch and soon rigged up an old ejection seat out of a L29 and  as  the pilot was upsidedown only on takeoff as the cockpit was reversed the risk of early decapitation was reduced[ just dont step out when right side up]. This enabled a much improved operator view of the area and allowed for a vertical exit in the case of an event like the one that CT9000 recently went through [condolences to the nursing home] allowing more prudent and effieceint operation with a lower cut height 

Edited January 12, 2022 by bull

[turboplanner]

.but requiring slightly faster reactions from the pilot which CT9000 found out (condolences to the nursing home, respects to nurses past and present). Cappy had a ride but he ejected early, so the machine is vack in the workshop again and .....

 

[bull is to be congratulated on joining the single dot club, saving millions of trees. We helpfully point out he gets to use one at the end free of the COUNT, otherwise we don't know if he's finished or about to add to his post - MOD2]

 

 

[Captain]

15 hours ago, turboplanner said:

(condolences to the nursing home, respects to nurses past and present).

ON A SERIOUS NOTE - Cappy wishes to add his condolences & respects as well, as he has always had an affection for Nurses ..... both past & present ....................................... plus the whole nursing home issue is expected to become a bit of an issue for him sometime only several decades away.

Edited January 12, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

[There's usually a Cappy or two in every Nursing Home:  MOD-17]

[Captain]

16 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

[There's usually a Cappy or two in every Nursing Home:  MOD-17]

Cappy thinks that is Cruel but Fair, however please note that we have had to remove Cappy's experience based yet nevertheless unacceptable comment relating to Nurses: MOD-31

Edited January 12, 2022 by Captain

[bull]

6 hours ago, Captain said:

Cappy thinks that is Cruel but Fair, however please note that we have had to remove Cappy's experience based yet nevertheless unacceptable comment relating to Nurses: MOD-31

And if cappy keeps sending naughty email notifications to amazon the NES will have to restrict his ability to post converse and interact with other NES members as his .................

[turboplanner]

......risky comments are likely to contaminate the good members who attend church on Sundays and help ..........

[onetrack]

......little old ladies across the street, when the traffic is extremely heavy. However, those good works pale in comparison to the good deeds that Cappy does (when he's not posting naughty stuff on the NES) - which good deeds apply right across that downtrodden and financially-challenged section of society - those poverty-stricken people who build kit planes in their garages, and who even manage to get airborne on an occasional basis, after spending some time begging outside shopping centres, holding up signs, "aircraft to support, please help", and who are usually mistreated and looked down on by.....

 

(NES'ers will note that OT retired from occasional contributions to the NES for a lengthy period, to allow those thousands of forum members to post multiple, scintillating paragraphs to the NES, thus alleviating the terrible boredom suffered by Planey, as he was obliged to stop reading the NES, thanks to the domination of the NES by only 2 or 3 dominating, self-obsessed, forum members - who obviously enjoyed the limelight, and who really contribute nothing of value to the NES.

However, now that thousands of forum members have started contributing to the NES again, it greatly relieves OT to know that, once again, the NES is back on track, and Planey must be looking forward daily to each new exciting addition to the story.....)

[turboplanner]

....the Rich People who buy $500 LHD cars from the US, Pay $10,000 to ship them to Australia, $55,000 for a big block Chevy with straight cut gears and 4 bolt mains, and is capable of squashing the rear axle against the front if not being driven by a trained RP person, and who then put them on trailers and tow them to the SummerNats, WinterNats, EasterNats and WesterNats, where they do donuts until a rear tyre blows, and then should "HOORAY!" and tow them home, or .....

[turboplanner]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

....the Rich People who buy $500 LHD cars from the US, Pay $10,000 to ship them to Australia, $55,000 for a big block Chevy with straight cut gears and 4 bolt mains, and is capable of squashing the rear axle against the front if not being driven by a trained RP person, and who then put them on trailers and tow them to the SummerNats, WinterNats, EasterNats and WesterNats, where they do donuts until a rear tyre blows, and then should "HOORAY!" and tow them home, or .....

....shout HOORAY!" and tow them home, or ...

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

shout HOORAY!" and tow them home, or ...

.... shout YIPPEE and tow them home, or ......

[Captain]

17 hours ago, onetrack said:

 

(NES'ers will note that OT retired from occasional contributions to the NES for a lengthy period, to allow those thousands of forum members to post multiple, scintillating paragraphs to the NES, thus alleviating the terrible boredom suffered by Planey, as he was obliged to stop reading the NES, thanks to the domination of the NES by only 2 or 3 dominating, self-obsessed, forum members - who obviously enjoyed the limelight, and who really contribute nothing of value to the NES.

However, now that thousands of forum members have started contributing to the NES again, it greatly relieves OT to know that, once again, the NES is back on track, and Planey must be looking forward daily to each new exciting addition to the story.....)

Like our great friend Onesie from the land of the long brown dust storm, the Skipper has remained reticent to post for fear of earning more wrath from Planey.

 

With Onesie & Ratty slow on the keyboard ATM, thank goodness Planey's call to post has been headed by so many new & humerous contributors.