The Never Ending Story

[onetrack]

..........landing at the wrong Tassie airstrip, or even worse, landing in Victoria, where Chairman Dan is waiting for his chance to..........

[Captain]

17 minutes ago, onetrack said:

..........landing at the wrong Tassie airstrip, or even worse, landing in Victoria, where Chairman Dan is waiting for his chance to..........

..... do a "Justin Trudeau" and designate the AUF as a white supremacist, gay hating, rabbit shooting, right wing terrorist organisation with bull as their leader.

 

On hearing this all AUF members flew down Little Burke St, landed in front of Parliament House, stopped traffic and linked arms, Canadian Trucker-like.

 

bull took out a bullhorn and started his rallying speech which commenced with "........

[turboplanner]

"............Under the Constitution  of the United States of America, we are gathered here today to right a terrible wrong."

Of course we know he was referring to the wrong country, but the words were so nice, it seemed a pity to change them. What did it matter anyway,  they were here to get stuck into the Government. This was also a mistake because they had landed too soon (flared too slow and didn't hold off) and they were standing on the steps of the old GPO wondering why the Politicians weren't appearing. Years later in forums they would refer to the "day we met the politicians and won our freedoms" but the hard truth was that the only people watching from the steps were druggies and academics.

An hour later he was finished, and looked around expecting a huge cheer to go up, but everyone had gone off to have a latte at one of the hundreds of coffee shops. However CT was not at all happy at being branded a rabbit shooter; he saw himself as a Pest Auditor, and always wore a suit, and .......................

Edited February 21, 2022 by turboplanner

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

However CT was not at all happy at being branded a rabbit shooter; he saw himself as a Pest Auditor, and always wore a suit, when ........

..... he skinned them with his gold plated, presentation grade ......

Edited February 21, 2022 by Captain

[CT9000]

.....number 4 square mouth shovel, which fitted in nicely with the suit { boiler suit } . The affore mentioned shovel was actually not gold plated but a light rust coating. The number 4 is also a good standby for terminating bunnies when the Winchester is getting low on fuel......

[onetrack]

......and speaking of fuel - what with the massive increase in fuel prices in recent weeks, bull has been working on a scheme to develop aircraft-grade fuel from anything else but crude oil.

At the present moment, bull has found there's a large stock of over-ripe Tassie apples that look like they will ferment beautifully, and provide a large quantity of aviation-grade alcohol supplement to his  now-meagre fuel supplies.

Bull hasn't found any way to supplement his income to make up for the major increase in fuel prices - and, as he won't ever reduce his flying hours, he's had to work out new and innovative methods to produce new alternative fuels. In addition, bull has recently found out there are Govt grants available for anyone coming up with new fuel source ideas, to reduce our reliance on imported fuels.

 

One of these grants being offered is also a Green Energy grant, and as the Jacka is already painted mint green, bull has estimated his chances of scoring a "Clean, Green Energy" grant, to be higher than at any other time in the history of Tassie aviation, and he's looking forward to.........

[turboplanner]

......blue skies in the green machine.

Turbo was emotionally moved by OT's Grants Scheme, and had started growing green peas. His reasoning was that it might be possible just to pour them into the tank and let nature take its course. Then, after researching for a couple of days he found the $35 billion per year Commonwealth Aboriginal Grants, and started a new venture Turbulla Yallock Greenfulla Pis, Inc

The $40 million Grant to the Turbulla Tribe of which Turbo was an Elder covered smiking ceremonies, a flag in every town with a green pea in place of the yellow circle, and a network of Turbulla Roadhouses with the attached Nulla Nulla Kitchens selling Yams, live witchety grubs, abd "Turbo's nearly Live Road Kill", with the tag "freshly speared today"

The only issue was that the peas didn't ferment fast enough in the tanks, and ..........

[Captain]

5 hours ago, turboplanner said:

The only issue was that the peas didn't ferment fast enough in the tanks, and ........

..... Turbulla Yallock Greenfulla Pis, Inc (respects and other BS past, present, future, at-the-moment and any other time etc) decided to slip in another grant application to cover the necessary R&D, entitled "A Treatise On The Fermentation of Green Peas Him Go QuickFaster", and that ...... 

[turboplanner]

........made all the difference because it paid for a trip to Alaska where Cappy and Turbo discovered a new liquid called Turbinium (c) which was ordourless, colourless, had a 100 octane rating straight out of the ground, so no need to refine it, inert unless the motor vehicle or aircraft or ship was fitted with a patented Turbinium Modulator, half the weight of petrol and could be sold with a handy profit at 30 cents a gallon. Cappy planned a network of "Big T" outlets/restaurants/pickup joints all over the country and was confident they would become the social centre of every town and best of all, Zero Emissions, so the EV industry was out of business and .....................

 

 

Cappy showing off the "Big T" infrastructure network:

 

 

Edited February 22, 2022 by turboplanner

[bull]

collecting Mt Wellington on the way to..............

[bull]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

so the EV industry was out of business and ....................Turbo had to sell off his EV division from Turbine industries,now this financial hit so soon after the sand island debarkle left him with...

 

[Captain]

13 hours ago, bull said:

collecting Mt Wellington on the way to........

..... owning a triptych of mountains after he already had (we never mention the "mount Mavis" story) Mount Kosciuszko, Mount Wellington and Mount ....... 

 

The sad part about this below triptych, as displayed in the foyer at

Turbine enterprises, is that Turdboy actually OWNS them all and won't

allow anyone else (not even his best mates) to go there. What a XXXX!

Edited February 23, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......Isa.

Not many people know that Turbo owns these mountains, not for profit, but for the Environment and Climate Change. Someone had to clean up the trails of gin bottles which destroyed the pristine environment. So far he hasn't been able to afford Mt Everest, and it shows; just a trash heap of discarded sardine cans and McDonalds wrappers, shredded tents, boots, and broken ladders.

On the triptych there's nothing but fresh air and .........

Edited February 23, 2022 by turboplanner

[Captain]

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......Isa.

Not many people know that Turbo owns these mountains, not for profit, but for the Environment and Climate Change. Someone had to clean up the trails of gin bottles which destroyed the pristine environment. So far he hasn't been able to afford Mt Everest, and it shows; just a trash heap of discarded sardine cans and McDonalds wrappers, shredded tents, boots, and broken ladders.

On the triptych there's nothing but fresh air and .........

...... this led Turdo to invest in the full breadth of the save nature scam (SNS).

 

Soon, adverts & fundraising promos were everywhere for Turbine WWF to save whatever cute little furry animal was flavor of the month (where for every donation you would receive a cute fluffy toy made out of the animal you were trying to save), Turbine Ocean Shepherds bought a heap of boats that were actually used secretly to herd whales into motherships for processing by Turbine Face Creams & Perfumes of Paris, and he was so craven as to even register Turbine Save The Little Kiddies, where he used photos of starving nippers to raise cash. As somebody said earlier, "What a XXXX". But the worst example was that he .........

Edited February 23, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....was selling extinct species using banned and illegal DNA modification cloning methods.

He'd already produced the three legged owl, sabre-toothed tiger, and a favourite; the self-catching fish, before ............

[Captain]

4 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....was selling extinct species using banned and illegal DNA modification cloning methods.

He'd already produced the three legged owl, sabre-toothed tiger, and a favourite; the self-catching fish, before ............

...... he concentrated on bringing back Elvis (at 96, to play a few gigs the Turbine Casinos in Vegas) ............... and Hitler, who Turbo thought would make a ......... 

Edited February 23, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

...........very good CASA director who would have the AUF rebels sorted out in the first .................

[Captain]

38 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

...........very good CASA director who would have the AUF rebels sorted out in the first .................

...... week (AUF members will have their houses, shops and hangars painted with a yellow aeroplane (avref) symbol), then he will march into Tasmania while at the same time prepare to attack the Western Front by locating crack troops along the McGowan Line and firing cannisters of Covid (what Marky Mark considers to be the new mustard gas) across the border into the sandhills (oh... the sandhills) before ..........

Edited February 23, 2022 by Captain

[bull]

7 hours ago, Captain said:

...... week (AUF members will have their houses, shops and hangars painted with a yellow aeroplane (avref) symbol), then he will march into Tasmania while at the same time prepare to attack the Western Front by locating crack troops along the McGowan Line and firing cannisters of Covid (what Marky Mark considers to be the new mustard gas) across the border into the sandhills (oh... the sandhills) before ..........

.SORRY TO INTERRUPT: ....NES,BREAKING NEWS...:Reports are coming out from small towns all over Australia that a "flyfree"CONVOY of aircraft are assembling to fly from Darwin via Qld and NSW to Tasmania and are planning apon having one aircraft each to "breakdown" on the active strip with standby breakdowns to cover the other runways on every major Airfield in Australia [ps The ramp towing contractors and bulldozer operators have all stood in solidarity with the grass roots aviators and are condemning the actions taken against the brotherhood of aviation and the fuellys are there too]  Now Casa officials are finding that suddenly a whole lot of :aircraft are having breakdowns on the active runways and these range up from thrusters to Airbuses....:End News Flash:                                                                                             Now back to the story.......before any of this could occur the new MAJOR country wide EMMERGENCY of these grass roots flyer convoy  thing must be dealt with as Marky mark could not get his mig 19,s [brought cheap from his biggest partner] off the runways to back up his line because of all the FOD on the runways from exploding rotaxes and the odd turbine. I know how we can fix this said OT we can..............

Edited February 24, 2022 by bull

[turboplanner]

.............put out a press release that CASA may be conducting Ramp Checks on random airports and airfields around Australia.

It was a brilliant move because within 30 minutes all runways in Australia were clear of aircraft, and ..............

[Captain]

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.............put out a press release that CASA may be conducting Ramp Checks on random airports and airfields around Australia.

It was a brilliant move because within 30 minutes all runways in Australia were clear of aircraft, and ..............

........ the AUF members were back in the bar where they belong, getting paralytic, telling lies (Turboref) and chasing the opposite sex (anotherTurboref).

 

But the runway's weren't as clear as Turbo had thought (and for which he would later be held liable) as a series of Cessna 172s had experienced a "Concorde" type takeoff issue when a tyre had disintegrated, hence causing a fuel tank to be ruptured by debris on several runways.

 

On examination, the debris comprised what infamously became known as "Blue Head Componentry" (the BHC scandal) ranging from gudgeon pin retention circlips to ........

 

BELOW IS TYPICAL OF THE BHC DEBRIS ON

MOST CTAF AIRPORT RUNWAYS IN OZ.

 

Edited February 24, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....muffler brackets.

The AUF members denied this vehemently, the pedants pointing to the press always blaming Cessnas (which had resulted in the Cessna v AUF case in 2010), but now turning on other innocent aviation groups. This spaked cries of Group Bashers from the less gifted members who weren't sure what it was all about but were going to have their say anyway, but then the rhetoric shifted to ...............

[Captain]

8 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

but then the rhetoric shifted to .......

...wards .....

[Captain]

23 hours ago, Captain said:

while at the same time prepare to attack the Western Front by locating crack troops along the McGowan Line ...

EXPLANATION FOR THE RECORD TO ENSURE NES CORRECTITUDE ..... But it turned out that they would not go there, as there were no female facilities up north of Border Village.

[turboplanner]

....and the full forces of McGowan Inc.

Faced with the need for action, the AUF members didn't quite know what to do; the attrition rate in those emergency takeoffs by the 10,000 members was 9,732 lying around in various sheds for circlips and other components to arrive from the suppliers.

McGowan ..............