The Never Ending Story

[bull]

22 minutes ago, onetrack said:

But Cappys erection frightened Bill so much, he ran away, having heard what happens in jail cells. This disappointed Cappy greatly, as he was looking forward to......

becoming a member of the ................

[Captain]

8 minutes ago, bull said:

becoming a member of the ................

The LMBTQP (Larry, Maurice, Bill, Terry and Quimby) potted community.

 

I'm not sure what applies in WA, but over here in the civilized parts of the country, there is a big difference between "standing erect" and having an ....

 

AS CAPPY SO OFTEN SAYS .....

Edited March 15, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

......small group who knew what happened to Vince Foster, and ..........

[Captain]

15 hours ago, turboplanner said:

......small group who knew what happened to Vince Foster, and ..........

..... Geoff E or Harold Holt, because .......

 

THE ABOVE 15 HOUR HIATUS IN NES POSTS WAS CAUSED BY THE TURGID PLONKER AND THE SKIPPER POSTING (ARRIVING ?) AT THE SAME TIME, WHICH IS MORE PROOF OF THEIR LIFELONG FRIENDSHIP.

Edited March 15, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....they all flew Aerolites, and so were quite weird, not participating in sites like this one, but exchanging views on the Dark Web or down at Bunnings coffee shop where they planned tactics to avoid CASA ramp checks. They have a sixth sense which tells them when to take off, and...............

[bull]

when to hit the chute,as all these latte drinking crew had twice as many takeoffs as landings in the logbooks and would NEVER fly an aircraft without a parachute system[that costs more than the aircraft] to compensate for thier lack of flying skills. Oh i don,t know about that ,said Cappy did you see the.......

Edited March 17, 2022 by bull

[turboplanner]

....story in this month's mag where an Aerolite owner fitted an LKS (Lane Keeping System) from a Hyundai Getz on it's side in an Aerolite, which now automatically climbs away from the earth below, and bigger aircraft, or birds, from above without requiring any action from the pilot, who now only has to focus on regularly applying suntan lotion to his upper thighs during the flight if he's wearing ..............

[Captain]

12 hours ago, turboplanner said:

who now only has to focus on regularly applying suntan lotion to his upper thighs during the flight if he's wearing ........

....... his usual frilly knickers (from Aerolite Merchandising P/L - A Turbinia Fashion Co subsidiary) and his low cut .......

[turboplanner]

........leather jerkin. Long term NES readers will know who this Aerolite buyer is, but new readers might not know the head of the Wagga Wagga BoB, fiery, locker, and all round citizen of the Lost Horizon, Locksie, the ....................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

........leather jerkin. Long term NES readers will know who this Aerolite buyer is, but new readers might not know the head of the Wagga Wagga BoB, fiery, locker, and all round citizen of the Lost Horizon, Locksie, the ....................

........ winner of the Ladysmith and the Gumly Gumly Citizen of the Year awards, both in the same year, and now Loxie has his (or her) sights set on winning the .........

[turboplanner]

.........round The Rock dash in his new Aerolite.

Riverina Pilots are ..............different, and although to most of us the route from Wagga Wagga International, at Forest Hill, which begins with a Lemans Start at the water tower, a run to the Gumly Gumly Pub, a walk (for most of them) to Baylis St, named after pioneer Arthur Bayles (yes we know, sp as Facthunter often says), back to WWI by taxi (for the first four; the rest have to wait until he gets back), and then the flight via Moron (only Wagga Wagga would give a suburb that name) Golf Course, to flour bomb a target marked X, and then via the suburb of San Isidore, where all the Mexicans build, and out to The Rock, collecting a wing scrape of moss (either wing acceptable) then back to WWI, where ........

Edited March 18, 2022 by turboplanner

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

and out to The Rock, collecting a wing scrape of moss (either wing acceptable) then back to WWI, where ........

..... in typical Loxie (and TuberPlanter) fashion they both ignored the restricted airspace at YKKA and the TurgidPlonker also spelt Moorong (where Cappy actually lives) incorrectly when he punched that into his GPS and ended up in Moorabbin, which was the nearest deductive link that Garmin had built into it, and which was also statistically correct, because a .......

 

 

(The above error by the TurbidPlunger reminded Cappy of when he punched "Maitland" into his GPS to flick over there from Cessnock to refuel, but ended up flying west into the setting sun. It was only Cappy's massive powers of deductive reasoning that arrived at the conclusion that he was a clot and heading for Maitland SA. But an embarrassing 180 saved the day (as they so often do) and Cappy vowed never to divulge his idiocy to anyone).

Edited March 18, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......technician from Captain Cook GPS Maps Inc ("We always find our way home") had misspelt Moorabbin, making it much closer to Moron Moorong.

 

Loxie always said that the Restricted Airspace was wasted over YKKA; "You can spit when you go over every time, and you wouldn't hit anything. The people they train are not soldiers, but girls."

 

Proud in his new Aerolite, he gave an extra hawk and dropped a big one........which landed right on General Foxhunter's face. Mark Turbine, now a Sergeant had been training as a sniper; a lot of Wagga people are snipers, and he gave the General a meaningful look. "Get him! said the General and the Sergeant settled on the bonnet of the new Range Rover.

 

Where Loxie went wrong was not realising Kappooka were now training with 50 Cal and live ammunition, and at one mile the scope showed the patches on he face where he hadn't shaved this morning.

 

The Sergeant popped on into the left axle, and the Aerolite helicoptered six times and Loxie five before the wing popped and loxie was looking down ................

 

 

[Captain]

4 hours ago, turboplanner said:

and loxie was looking down ........

..... (avref) .....

[turboplanner]

...in the stall [avref] ........

[Captain]

4 hours ago, turboplanner said:

...in the stall [avref] ........

.......... which was located just outside Stawell, was Gunsynd and a strapper named ........

 

 

HERE IS GUNSYND HAVING A LITTLE RUN AROUND BEFORE BEING PUT IN THE STALL.

Edited March 19, 2022 by Captain

[Captain]

13 hours ago, Captain said:

HERE IS GUNSYND HAVING A LITTLE RUN AROUND BEFORE BEING PUT IN THE STALL.

...... while using delicate loose hands on the control in order to carefully managing the usual left wing drop and the resultant bowel loosening that follows the .....

Edited March 20, 2022 by Captain

[Captain]

17 minutes ago, Captain said:

...... while using delicate loose hands on the control in order to carefully managing the usual left wing drop and the resultant bowel loosening that follows the .....

 

FOR OUR STEWED-ANT NES'ERS, THE BELOW VIDEO SHOWS CAPPY CAREFULLY & SKILFULLY MANAGING

A DOSILE STALL SO THAT HE DOES NOT FRIGHTEN HIS PASSENGER.

 

 

[turboplanner]

.....gentle stall if the joystick is not handled correctly. This video shows Turbiniia Svetlana Kapanina preparing for some straightforward stall practice. In the preamble you can see a young Loxie helping with the headset, and receiving a very cleat "NYET!" as he groped for her buckle.

 

In the air, all seems to be going well for some time, then she loses it big time when the wing drops and she pushes the joystick one way when she should have pushed it the other, but some calm comments in the headset by Turbo soon has the situation ............

 

 

 

 

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

In the air, all seems to be going well for some time, then she loses it big time when the wing drops and she pushes the joystick one way when she should have pushed it the other, but some calm comments in the headset by Turbo soon has the situation ...........

...... 100% under control.

 

For those, like me, who have known (and been subjected to) Turdboy for well over half a century, it is clear that Svetlana holds Turbo in extremely high regard, as her hair is coloured & styled the same as his and her flying suit matched the colour of Tubb's 'Vette exactly (the white design down her legs mirrors the scratches and rust marks around the 'Vette's guards), but the most telling is the way that her hand grabs, grips, throttles & manipulates the top of the control stick, which is exactly how Turbo likes her to grip, twist, grab, throttle & manipulate his ...........

Edited March 20, 2022 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.........accounts books (she has an MBA) further increasing profitability, which is going to be used in the new productioon facility built outside Volgograd. It was built outside Volgograd becaise of the high chance that Volgograd might just be a stain on the map if Vlad doesn't start to behave himself and .............

 

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.........accounts books (she has an MBA) further increasing profitability, which is going to be used in the new productioon facility built outside Volgograd. It was built outside Volgograd becaise of the high chance that Volgograd might just be a stain on the map if Vlad doesn't start to behave himself and .............

 

....... this is an issue that Turbo knows well, as he has often been described as a stain on the Turbine family name, not to mention the unsightly stain on the front of his .......

Edited March 20, 2022 by Captain

[onetrack]

....'Vette, where he accidentally demolished a front fence post as he returned home from a night of carousing at the........

[turboplanner]

BOB Members' Only section with Turbinia Svetlana and had decided to walk home after he'd asked Svetlana to show him how she operated the two sticks and she grabbed both his wrists and squeezed, twisted and nearly jerked his arms out of their sockets.

 

He's had the bad luck to be relieving himself against a fence post just as the Corvette skidded off the corner and hit him from behind, squeezing his ample gut around the post, creating a reverse Bernouli effect, and spraying ..............

 

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

He's had the bad luck to be relieving himself against a fence post just as the Corvette skidded off the corner and hit him from behind, squeezing his ample gut around the post, creating a reverse Bernouli effect, and spraying .........

...... like the biggest tomcat in Moorabbin.

 

This was the basis of the subsequent .......