The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

...................went on to the Universities, and that's why we see such nonsense about Climate change, parking fees, speed limits, noise limits, great parties and .................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

...................went on to the Universities, and that's why we see such nonsense about Climate change, parking fees, speed limits, noise limits, great parties and .................

..... misrepresented preservation orders for pigmy possums, tasmanian bulls & WA .........

[turboplanner]

10 minutes ago, Captain said:

..... misrepresented preservation orders for pigmy possums, tasmanian bulls & WA .........

.......rabbit proof fences.

With Pygmy Possums now almost extinct, Turbo turned his attention to the possibility of using cat skins, this being the only product of the farms that hadn't sold well. Unfortunately women knew the difference between cat fur and  Mink or Ermine. In his gap year Turbo got a job trapping Ermine at Minsk. They were bastards; if they were caught by the hind leg they could still get around behind you and bite your ear off. Turbo got into trouble for having ear piercings when he got home, but it was nothing compared to the pain of being swung around by a big Ermine with someone yelling "Nyet Hurting!", "Nyet Hurting!" so the pelt wasn't bruised.

He did a run of Catskins for the Electric Drifter. On the day he tried them out he'd been tired and forgot to plug in the ED for the 16 hour mandatory charge before take off, and the cat skins were HEAVY! He got it off the ground, but couldn't make altitude and the tallest thing straight ahead was the Catholic Church, where it happened that old Willis Garside was in the confessional telling a long story about snitching the neighbour's grapes and before the priest could reply there was a huge crash and Willis thought God had tried to strike him down and missed, so .................

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

He did a run of Catskins for the Electric Drifter. On the day he tried them out he'd been tired and forgot to plug in the ED for the 16 hour mandatory charge before take off, and the cat skins were HEAVY! He got it off the ground, but couldn't make altitude and the tallest thing straight ahead was the Catholic Church, where it happened that old Willis Garside was in the confessional telling a long story about snitching the neighbour's grapes and before the priest could reply there was a huge crash and Willis thought God had tried to strike him down and missed, so ........

..... Willis went outside and after inspecting the damage said to Turbo "You are supposed to take the cats out of the cat skins, mate".

 

Just then a couple of the moggies came to and went at it just like those in the below video.

 

When Mavis saw the video she commented "That's the way that Turbo used to make love when he was younger."

 

Turbo was embarrassed about all issues mentioned above and he tried to .........

 

 

[turboplanner]

.........change the subject in case that time when he got her under the floor and kept hitting his head on the joists came out.

 

He could kick himself about the cats, and now there were legs with sharp claws all over the place and they were spitting and biting andy aircraft handlers that came near. It wasn't every day you tried to hold the wing for a mate and it bit your fourth finger off, so Turbo put the ED away for the night. All night the ..................

[Captain]

14 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

biting andy aircraft handlers that came near. It wasn't every day you tried to hold the wing for a mate and it bit your fourth finger off, so Turbo put the ED away for the night. All night the ..........

...... cats kept at it and so did Turbo, thinking he was young again ... (please review the above video and appreciate that part of what Mavis was remembering, in addition to the torrid lovemaking, was that Turbo was a bit of a Ranga back then and his breath smelt like cat food).

 

As the cats fought on, Andy the aircraft handler, a new arrival in the NES, lusted after the ED minus the cats and he snuck over to the hangar to ........

Edited January 19, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....strip the skin off.

180 cats spitting and snarling in unison make an awesome sound, but he was not cat-wise.

He undid the skins. The cats, irate after the aerobatics and counting their nine lives, than the apalling landing and now they were lose. Soon there wsn't a square milimetres on his skin that wasn't scratched or bleeding. Thecats moved down the street to ................

[Captain]

14 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The cats moved down the street to ........

...... seek their next victim as they had learnt to all act in concert and to hunt as a pack (just like the girls do at the Bone CWA ... hence poor bull's torrid experience and why that drove him to bugger off to VD Land).

 

Andy the Aircraft Handler teamed up with Willis the Confessor & decided to form the Catholic Cat Scratch Gang (the CCSG), so Willis dressed Andy's wounds and Andy gave Willis a few Hail Marys before they proceeded to .........

Edited January 19, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

3 hours ago, Captain said:

...... seek their next victim as they had learnt to all act in concert and to hunt as a pack (just like the girls do at the Bone CWA ... hence poor bull's torrid experience and why that drove him to bugger off to VD Land).

 

Andy the Aircraft Handler teamed up with Willis the Confessor & decided to form the Catholic Cat Scratch Gang (the CCSG), so Willis dressed Andy's wounds and Andy gave Willis a few Hail Marys before they proceeded to .........

.....hand prop the ED.

The engine didn't seem to be starting so Willis asked Andy to swing the prop for a while and he started tweaking the controls and switches, one of which was the on switch for the electric motor which took off one of Andy's hands. "Get in" yelled Willis, "We....................."

[Captain]

4 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....hand prop the ED.

The engine didn't seem to be starting so Willis asked Andy to swing the prop for a while and he started tweaking the controls and switches, one of which was the on switch for the electric motor which took off one of Andy's hands. "Get in" yelled Willis, "We....................."

..... can get away with this ED red handed. Well you are anyway, and please try not to bleed on my ......

[turboplanner]

.......leopard skin coat. Willis was the "Black Sheep" of the Turbine family and got a great kick out of embarrasing the others.

 

He'd show up at...........................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......leopard skin coat. Willis was the "Black Sheep" of the Turbine family and got a great kick out of embarrasing the others.

 

He'd show up at...........................

..... Turbine family shindigs and be relatively indistinguishable from all the other black sheep, then regail them all with his story about how funny it was when he flicked on Ign # 1 and one of Andy's hands went missing almost simultaneously. "You should have seen the look on the wimp's face" added Willis with a chuckle.

 

But then he blurted out the words that all of the family agreed with yet kept suppressed "For goodness sake, can we stop talking about f'n Trucks, Speedway, Airbloodycraft and the NES."

 

Turbo, the acknowledged patriarch of the Turbine clan, pulled Turbinia close to him, in a slightly paedophiliac manner, and replied "...... 

Edited January 19, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....On the first day it was hard work because I had to make the Earth as it is today. When I went to the Bank looking for funds, the Manager said "Who do you think you are ....................?

 

 

[Captain]

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....On the first day it was hard work because I had to make the Earth as it is today. When I went to the Bank looking for funds, the Manager said "Who do you think you are ....................?

 

 

.... so I had my son boot him out of the temple and then ...

[turboplanner]

......turn the sod into a pillar of stone, and said "Try Chewing on that Cowabunga!", but he ..........

[Captain]

3 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......turn the sod into a pillar of stone, and said "Try Chewing on that Cowabunga!", but he ..........

..... turned to salt instead so I lost a lot of credibility, which gave the Muslims a leg in to ....

[turboplanner]

.....put up a proposal that we ban pork, and now I have to consider the Pork bellies futures market, and it's not Sunday for another four days, but of course I could.................

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

.....put up a proposal that we ban pork, and now I have to consider the Pork bellies futures market, and it's not Sunday for another four days, but of course I could.................

.... go with the name Pork Scratchings" which Turbo thought of due to that itchy red & moist rash on his upper (right up the top) inner thigh.

 

you cant use the name pork said bull, who is an expert on the foibles of the Jewish and Muslim cultures.

 

"They'd sell better if you called them cat scratching" said ..........

 

 

[turboplanner]

Willis who was beginning to enyjoy his discussions with the Voice. He began to wonder if he might get the job as Moses II, and the sky turned dark and there was a huge clap of thunder......"Oops" said Willis. The Voice said "Pardon me, I'll have to stop eating those green plums; do you remember Moses?"

Willis nodded his head; "Can't hear you" said the voice, "speak up man!" and Willis nervously said "yes."

The Voice said "I want you to.............................................."

[Captain]

10 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The Voice said "I want you to.............

..... beget .....

Edited January 20, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.........44 children who shall be known as the children of Israel, and when they are all 18 and fit for travel take them back to look for my glasses; I dropped them out in the desert somewhere.

A cold wind started to run up Willis's back "But Moses wandered around with the last lot for 40 years!"

"As long as it takes" said the voice "you want 54 children, no problem, but I've been misreading too many arrivals - for one thing I put Yassar Arafat with the girls choir, and that's not a good thing to do"

Willis ..........

 

[Captain]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

..... for one thing I put Yassar Arafat with the girls choir, and that's not a good thing to do"

Willis ..........

..... was surprised at this as he had always liked and admired Yassar plus he had won a few shekels from winning Yassar Arafat look alike competitions.

 

Willis also admired Yassar's hot wife and this encouraged him to take on the role in Aussie as the spokesman & part time bomb chucker for the PLO, where he came to the attention of Turbine Security Forces PLC, which meant that ...... 

 

SUHA FANCYS WILLIS TOO AND HERE SHE IS AFTER A HOT NIGHT AT HIS JOINT BELOW A PHOTO FROM WILLIS'S LAST WIN AT THE EASTER SHOW'S YASSAR LOOK ALIKE COMP

Edited January 20, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....they had to hand him over to the Alchol, Tobacco & Firearms dudes.

The ATF did things that were too gross for the CIA and Willis knew the start of it would be to give him a cigarette, something the family despised. If they didn't get the answers they wanted they would give him the dripping alcohol torture which was ten times worse than the bamboo water torture and if that didn't work they would start blowing bits off him with a 30 08 , leaving his talking parts and brain until last, so he devised ........................

[Captain]

.... a plan that he had previously discussed with bull, as it was how bull (avref) had escaped from the Bone CWA ladies when they had held him as their sex slave ...... and while the Bone ladies hadn't threated to "blow bits off him" as the ATF guys had, the Bone ladies had certainly threatened to "wear bits away", so he took bull's plan and .......

Edited January 21, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

........bought a Tyro. After washing Bird droppings off the wings, catefully catching the mixture and bottling it he made enough selling the “Turbine Fertilser makes your roses grow four times faster“  earning enough to afford a recon for the Tyro plus a big muffler, as the dusk settled he softly climbed into the night. Now pedants might tell you this is non CD-R flying, but Willis has taken notice of the numerous WF members that said it was OK. Soon he was over.......