The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

7 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........posts on recflyn in six different threads entitled Empennage Stiker stuck, Sealed Exhaust pipe, 

Funny thing happened today, sticker Plane, plane Sticker and Flying with sticker.

The bulk of the comments were about who had posted first.  No one ........................

..... fully appreciated that the NES had broken the news first, in an exclusive yet very friendly discussion, which gave a glimpse of the future of modern journalism, that led to the formation of Turbine .....

[turboplanner]

......Modern Journalism Inc. likely to be a successor to the now rarely used Reuters.

Announcing the new wordwide conglomorate, the President, Chip Turbine said:

"The problem with Reuters was they always waited to get their news conformed by sources and then sent the data to newspapers where the sub editors didn't processed it until they finished their poker game, and the type setters didn't start until after lunch.

 

"We will not be waiting for sources and will be using the same lightning fast transmission speeds as Securities companies do, so if a footballer exposes himself in a nightclub, we'll have photos out before he can put it away."

 

Not everyone was happy with this, especially ....................

 

[Captain]

55 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

Not everyone was happy with this, especially ...............

.... those that collected photos of footballers with it still out.

 

bull thought that this sounded .....

[turboplanner]

.....a bit.....

[Captain]

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....a bit.....

..... too close to the bone (footballerwithitoutref & Boneref).

 

He therefore .....

[turboplanner]

.......called on his old drinking mate from bone who was a fully initiated Guli Guli kaditcha to pout the bone.

Guli Guli’s eyesight wasn’t what it used to be and by mistake he aimed it at.......

 

[Captain]

11 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.......called on his old drinking mate from bone who was a fully initiated Guli Guli kaditcha to pout the bone.

Guli Guli’s eyesight wasn’t what it used to be and by mistake he aimed it at.......

 

...... bull's neather region, but thankfully Guli's 1st attempt was just pouting it, so no real damage was done. 

 

geeez guli old mate be careful where you pout that thing and i suggest that you stop using it to try to kill everyone that voted against the voice

 

Guli smiled, reloaded the bone, set it to "stun" and carefully ......

Edited December 25, 2023 by Captain

[Captain]

14 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Guli Guli kaditcha

Note - During a moment of interracial harmony, Guli asked bull whether Turbo & OT are Kaditchas, as he had heard lots of good things about their powers.

 

no said bull, they are just kads.

[turboplanner]

....aimed it at bull's heart, then spoke the magic spell.

It hit bull in the Gulis.

bull let go a howl that could be heard for ....................................

 

 

[Cappy and Turbo, in a silly decision over a Christmas drink some years ago, decided to sail down the Amazon river by canoe from the pools in the Andes to its 380 km wide mouth.

 

They successfuly navigated the dangerous rapids on the Maranon, stopped in for Lattes at Iquitos then into the Ucayali where, just north of Atalaya they were captured by Campa indians who had mistaken them for slave traders. Cappy, who speaks several languages of the Amazon Valley which he'd learned from Dr Livingston when he was a Oxford, was able to convince the hostile tribe that (a) they were Australians, which relaxed them considerably, (one warrior yelling "Go the Pies!" before being shut up by scowls from the others) and (b) they were searching for new medicines for humanity. They were taken before the Brujo who was sitting in a cave half way up the mountain clicking the bones of dead Spaniards. The Brujo responded by lighting a small fire and boiling some brew which he put under their noses and then his nose.  Soon all three were travelling through space looking down on the earth......but that's another story.]

 

 

 

[Captain]

52 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

....aimed it at bull's heart, then spoke the magic spell.

It hit bull in the Gulis.

bull let go a howl that could be heard for ..........

..... millennia. 

 

geez gasped bull i can see where you got your name from as that does more than tickle.

 

Gulis took off his feather moccasins and dropped his ......

[turboplanner]

.......eyes, for it was forbidden by the Gods to look upon a New Victorian.

Just how the Gods knew Tasmania had bumped into Victoria was not explained along with whether the Gods just Messaged the Gulis or sent them emails, but if Ernie Dingo could invent the "Welcome to country smoking ceremony" where you could charge $750 a ceremony to Councils and Government, then he was going to be in on it.

So he began to chant "

 

[Captain]

.... there is a rainbow serpent trapped between Tasmania and Victoria and he is getting pretty shitty, so he has specifically asked/demanded that I, Guilis Guilis, alone, be retained to release it to the ......

[turboplanner]

...councils and governments for a fee of only 10% of every major project and only through me, the rainbow serpent’s monitor.

 

Within six months, he was the richest man in Australia and had begun saying silly things like ......

[turboplanner]

[IMPORTANT OMISSION CORRECTION]
The Councils adopted this procedure, adjusted their budgets and increased the Rates to cover it. The State and Territory governments covered themselves by increasing car registration costs x 3. The Commonwealth Government provided VIP RAAF Aircraft, re-budgeted for two permanent people on site, and decrease Pension rates by 40%. Albo said “We had to”. Even the New Palestinians marched in the demos yelling “......

[onetrack]

......"pout the bone at all Jews and make them die slowly!" This brought out the "Anti-Bone Pouting" activists who started their own march, pointing out (without pouting), that Bone Pouting was an ancient and sacred tradition, that was being reduced to a commercially-exploited level, and by doing so, the exploiters would end up being.......

[Captain]

.... a bigger problem than Hamas and building tunnels under Wilson's Promintary and The Nut, plus under the RMH and the ....

[turboplanner]

......Art Gallery which produced most of the dissidents and probablhy voted ...........................

[onetrack]

.....for a Bone Pouting Day, out of respect to all the great Bone Pouters, past, present and future.

 

"We just call it Boning here", said Cappy, when heard about the Bone Pouters dissidents. In fact, they reckon I've Boned everything on two legs around here, and someone even claimed I was known as the Phantom Boner, thanks to my tendency to sneak around at night holding my Bone, and.........

 

Edited December 26, 2023 by onetrack

[Captain]

4 hours ago, onetrack said:

.....for a Bone Pouting Day, out of respect to all the great Bone Pouters, past, present and future.

 

"We just call it Boning here", said Cappy, when heard about the Bone Pouters dissidents. In fact, they reckon I've Boned everything on two legs around here, and someone even claimed I was known as the Phantom Boner, thanks to my tendency to sneak around at night holding my Bone, and.........

 

...... pouting, almost willy nilly.

 

The popularity of pouting increased exponentially, the APF was formed, as was the Pouter's Land Council, and a .....

[turboplanner]

....a new law was introduced requiring poutable water to be connected to every dwelling, and the New Encyclopedia Brittannica included a whole chapter on how Bone Pouters were Australia's First Peoples with examples and photos of how the first Europeans missed them. If they'd settled at Coffs Harbour for example they would have encountered the Banana Pouter tribe; if they'd settled on the Gold Coast they would have known it was South Bone; if they'd settled in Warrnambool instead of Melbourne they would have known it was Mahogany, and if they'd settled in Perth they would never have been heard of again because this was the feared Soup Bone Territory.

 

Their weapons were............................

[Captain]

.... rudimentary yet efficient, with each used, empty pout (most contained 6 good pouts before needing to be reloaded) being sharpened for reuse as part of the tribe's net-zero ....

[turboplanner]

......policy. The United Nations had sent a special 747 with their advisors and a white Humvee on board, and gone though the Bone Pouting tribes one by one exlaining the principle of global warming as the UN saw it. Their contribution to the UN for controlling UN Global warming was going to be $1 billion per year, so the quickly doubled the need for welcoming ceremonies and added a $475.00 Farewell Ceremony which included not only lighting a fire, but putting it out.

 

One group of Bone Pouters tried to convince all the others that rather than pouting the bone, it would be better for the world if the tribe just bit people.

 

This was seen as barbaric; something their grandparents did, but ............

 

[Captain]

.... they did not sink their teeth in, like the Aurora Serpent does. Instead, a sucking motion was used.

 

The grandparents were members of the LBPT (Love Bite Pouters Tribe), and as a result, there were lots of them, so that they outnbered all the other pouting tribes combined, and their neck covering headdress was adopted as ......

Edited December 27, 2023 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....their totem. The top half was black representing the Rainbow Pouter in the night sky, the bottom was brown representing the sea and in the middle was a red circle representing a severed neck.

 

These people were Catholics.

 

It soon became obvious that ............................

 

 

[Captain]

36 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

These people were Catholics.

 

It soon became obvious that ...........

..... whenever a pouting recipient was pouted by a Catholic, they needed to .....