The Never Ending Story

[Captain]

1 hour ago, Captain said:

.... it eventually became essential, a rule even, to take-off (avref) and to take-on (avref) by using the long & skinny dimension of the runway (avref) (modelingref), and .....

Cappy understands that there is still animosity about this rule being forced on AUF members, so just to be helpful to those NESers that are still having trouble with it, below are 2 photos of what a runway looks like when correctly oriented (asianavref) down the long bit.

PS - Tip for StewedAnts - You don't always have to use 30 right if your airport doesn't have one, just take-off or land-on down the long bit .... At the moment, choice of wind direction is optional although the AUF is expected to say something about that in 2025. (Tip - It adds adventure and derring-do, + demonstrates refined piloting skills, to occasionally take-off and land-on with-the-wind when it is above 15 knots gusting 30.)

 

Turbo modelling the latest AUF merch down another runway. As you can see, he can be unnecessarily petulant at times like this.

Edited February 11 by Captain

[CT9000]

......all the real pilots will know that the above photo is only a side view of the 03/21 runway. A bit short but plenty wide.........

[Captain]

19 minutes ago, CT9000 said:

......all the real pilots will know that the above photo is only a side view of the 03/21 runway. A bit short but plenty wide.........

.... and that, dear readers, is the problem of the AUF, encapsulated in one post.

 

The instruction in some idiotic handbook, or other, says land along the long skinny bit, but the CT immediately opts to land on the short wide bit.

 

This fun side of the AUF is, for some strange reason, something that CASA are having a bit of trouble accepting, and they .....

Edited February 12 by Captain

[Captain]

12 hours ago, Captain said:

This fun side of the AUF is, for some strange reason, something that CASA are having a bit of trouble accepting, and they .....

..... simply are just not as much fun as their trickster colleagues at the Tax Office, or those wags down at the Canberra Morgue.

 

As a result, the words "joke", "fun", "humour ", "pathos", and "double entendre" have been classified as misinformation and extreme right-wing under the new legislation, which caused .....

Edited February 12 by Captain

[Captain]

3 hours ago, Captain said:

..... simply are just not as much fun as their trickster colleagues at the Tax Office, or those wags down at the Canberra Morgue.

 

As a result, the words "joke", "fun", "humour ", "pathos", and "double entendre" have been classified as misinformation and extreme right-wing under the new legislation, which caused .....

..... The NES to be shut down after being classified as an extreme right-wing terrorist organisation, and Wreck Flying to be exposed as a part of the ISIS Aviation Network, partly membered up by the Aussie Pensioner's Action Party (the much-feared APAP) and controlled, at least in part, by the Turbine Muslim Infiltration Network (the TMIN) (musref).

 

The members of Wreck Flying voted as one, to ......

Edited February 12 by Captain

[turboplanner]

[Could CT explain which photo he was talking about - there are two - Squealer]

 

[turboplanner]

....continue operations without the assistance of CASA or the Politicians of Canberra.

The AUF's best friend, Barnaby Joyce was distraught when he heard about this; he had secretly always wanted to become Minister for Aviation and Ultralights and before he had recovered he was on the phone to Little Albo who had been a Minister of Aviation (which no one remembers). NES readers will receall recent News coverage of this, but of course they didn't know the reason that Barnaby had been struck down, or what he said which was ......................................

[Captain]

10 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

The AUF's best friend, Barnaby Joyce was distraught when he heard about this; he had secretly always wanted to become Minister for Aviation and Ultralights and before he had recovered he was on the phone to Little Albo who had been a Minister of Aviation (which no one remembers). NES readers will receall recent News coverage of this, but of course they didn't know the reason that Barnaby had been struck down, or what he said which was ......................................

.... that he had been affected by the same fall-down-cult (FDC) that had thrown Dan down the stairs, and by coming after Barnaby they demonstrated that they were indiscriminate/a-political as to affiliation and similarly as to stairs vs flat.

 

Given that both Danny and Barnaby were damaged as a result, this force was ....

Edited February 12 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....quite powerful. NES readers will remember that Malcolm Fraser's pants were struck down in Texas one night, and .......................

[Captain]

1 hour ago, turboplanner said:

....quite powerful. NES readers will remember that Malcolm Fraser's pants were struck down in Texas one night, and .......................

..... this all proves that dark forces are at work, which is a bit of a worry when you are already relying on several forces, including friction, drag (avref & childhoodeducatorref & gayref), plus lift (avref & elevatorref) to keep from .....

Edited February 12 by Captain

[turboplanner]

going a.........................

 

[Mods: what happend to the post from Squeal a few minutes ago where he said ....."breaking the Lift cables:]

[onetrack]

......round in circles with one leg in, and one leg out. However, one has to note, that thanks to some unseen forces, Barnaby Joyce managed to keep his pants on this time, despite being horizontal - which is more than can be said for his time spent in his office with his favourite staffer.

 

The Libs have currently launched a major internal investigation into these previously unknown and unseen forces that kept Barnabys pants up - with whisperings in Parliamentary Liberal offices that if these forces could be harnessed specifically for Liberal Party use, and their use denied to other political parties, the ramifications would be that Labor politicians could be seen without their pants on, on a scale previously unimaginable, while no Liberal would ever be seen pantless in public again.

 

Peter Dutton was ecstatic, this was the secret weapon he needed to take back the...........

 

[CT9000]

8 hours ago, turboplanner said:

[Could CT explain which photo he was talking about - there are two - Squealer]

 

Turbs. you need to get out a bit more. Maybe I should have mentioned avref

[turboplanner]

3 hours ago, CT9000 said:

Turbs. you need to get out a bit more. Maybe I should have mentioned avref

squealer sent you that; not me.

[Captain]

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

squealer sent you that; not me.

Will Onesie and bull please contact me to discuss what we are going to do about the Squealer, whoever he/she or it may be.

This poster, under the name of the Squealer has been an issue since post #2 of the NES and I look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Edited February 13 by Captain

[Captain]

13 hours ago, onetrack said:

Peter Dutton was ecstatic, this was the secret weapon he needed to take back the........

...... parliamentary pants height controls ........ as low pants or off-pants is not the major issue, because there are more than a few members in the Harry high-pants category.

 

As we all know from having to deal with their posts, there are also some Harry-High-Pants that have also infiltrated Wreck Flying.

 

"I agree" said Penny Wong "This new high-pants fad is a problem for somebody who is 4' 6" tall and I am sick and tired of ......

Edited February 13 by Captain

[Captain]

This shows the extent of the problem and could be your next biennial CFI.

This is not Turbo as he does not have blue braces ....... and I don't think it is Squealer either.

Edited February 13 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....."people disussing this subject as if it were about people, when in fact the whole word knows that its about the High WHEEL Pants of Cessnas.

Those of us who actually fly Cessnas (I fly a Caravan) know that high pants have a distinct advantage in the wet because they don't get muddy, and cab be taken off in .................................

 

[the person in the blue braces above is a well - known forum dweller who is always banging on about what CASA is doing wrong. One of the reasons he has so much trouble is that CASA don't have to send photos out to FoIs]

[Captain]

4 hours ago, turboplanner said:

Those of us who actually fly Cessnas (I fly a Caravan) know that high pants have a distinct advantage in the wet because they don't get muddy, and cab be taken off in ........

...... the hangar whenever the Cessna owner wants to feel the wind in their hair and to have their scarf a-flap'n.

 

This fact, as recently exposed by Turbo in his previous post is a sad one, and is the reason why Cessnas have appeared so often in the mainstream media's crash reports.

 

"This discovery by Turbo is a biggie and could get him the AO after which is hankers, as the issue is similar in principle to the door plug falling out of the Alaska Airlines Boeing recently. All Cessna aircraft worldwide are therefore grounded as a result, until all of their cabs can be permanently afixed and all owners are retrained so as not to "take their cab off" as Turbo so succinctly stated it." said the boss cocky of CASA.

 

"But what will we write about in future?" cried the reporters of the MSM, who had all previously added the word Cessna into their ...... 

Edited February 15 by Captain

[turboplanner]

....spellchecks. As we now however they will only have to wait because both GA and RA will always provide those larger than life characters who come unstuck flying through railway tunnels or attaching a 200 litre drum of diesel to the 172 with ratchet load straps, to "take down to the tractor", or break the current record of five in a J230, 13 in a 172. These are the adventurers .......................

 

[Captain]

.... that deserve to be celebrated, like .....

Edited February 15 by Captain

[turboplanner]

Cappy, the only person ever to fly under the Wagga Bridge. He did it in his J230. "I had to grind the fin off because of the low height" he said afterwards and I just scraped past that hill.

Afterwards, Constable Doubtfire .................."

 

The photo shows the Eskys of two fishermen who had been quietly dropping a line in.

 

[Captain]

..... issued a statement that said "After he flew under it a few times he got bored and "did a CT" by flying through the spans while the Southern Aurora was coming along, and while that was highly illegal, I found it to be a turn-on when he then went downstream to the Hampton Bridge and flew sideways, knife-edge style, through the spans, then through the oval holes in the supports. The croud went berserk yet Cappy remained his usual modest and unassuming self, when he .....

 

The Hampton Bridge after the adoring crowd had disbursed. 

Edited February 16 by Captain

[turboplanner]

22 minutes ago, Captain said:

..... issued a statement that said "After he flew under it a few times he got bored and "did a CT" by flying through the spans while the Southern Aurora was coming along, and while that was highly illegal, I found it to be a turn-on when he then went downstream to the Hampton Bridge and flew sideways, knife-edge style, through the spans, then through the oval holes in the supports. The croud went berserk yet Cappy remained his usual modest and unassuming self, when he .....

 

The Hampton Bridge after the adoring crowd had disbursed. 

........flew under the hooks through the local meatworks, and blew the netballers skirts up with a quick touch and go on the court. He was a legend down at the BoB, with his Wing Commanders moustache. No one could work out how he kept it so stiff until someone walked in on him and found him pouring a bottle of Red Loctite on it.

 

The best times were always during the harvests coming in with the legs in the crop until the farmer turned the autonomous steering off then blowing cocky chaff all over him with the slipstream, or .................

 

 

[Note: the first photo in this "bridge series" was taken in the moonlight after his fifth pass; he can just be seen in the twilight.]

[onetrack]

......when the crowds were disbursing - and they nearly always disbursed $10 and $20 notes, which Cappy would pick up with a sharpened stick at 60 knots or more, whilst leaning out of the cockpit and holding a 45° bank. However, during one of the disbursement stunts, Cappy misjudged, and speared a.............