The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

......the local sewerage farm, and this became known among the in-crowd as an "outlanding" (derived from "Outhouse, or Dunny").

Outlandings could be "easy", when the drying pond was only up to your knees or "tough" if your head went under, or .....................

[Captain]

On 23/03/2024 at 7:15 PM, turboplanner said:

......the local sewerage farm, and this became known among the in-crowd as an "outlanding" (derived from "Outhouse, or Dunny").

Outlandings could be "easy", when the drying pond was only up to your knees or "tough" if your head went under, or .....................

.....dinarily, in such a case (Turboref), you would be classified as a .......

[turboplanner]

......"floater".

This caused Wally Jing Lee to lose "face" and he went berserk in the Drifter, attempting to crash into the Hobart Clock Tower, but like all Chinese when berserk, pulled it to the left every time and eventually ran out of fuel and making a ditching in the upper reaches of the Derwent where a former WreckFly-In member and NESer, QWERTY waded out and dragged the bedraggled pilot and Drifter to shore. QWERTY had been knighted by the Tasmanian Governor for his services to Aviation and given ............................

[Captain]

2 hours ago, turboplanner said:

......"floater".

This caused Wally Jing Lee to lose "face" and he went berserk in the Drifter, attempting to crash into the Hobart Clock Tower, but like all Chinese when berserk, pulled it to the left every time and eventually ran out of fuel and making a ditching in the upper reaches of the Derwent where a former WreckFly-In member and NESer, QWERTY waded out and dragged the bedraggled pilot and Drifter to shore. QWERTY had been knighted by the Tasmanian Governor for his services to Aviation and given ............................

• .... A certificate written on the last remaining skin of a Tazzy Tiger.
   
• A plastic knighthood badge made from recycled cans from the Devil's Brewery.
   
• Life membership of the Tazzy Tigers AFL Club (if it ever gets up).
   
• And access to the AFL Drug Taking Room down by the docks, complete with 20 free AFL Do-Not-Pass-Go Drug Passes (conditional only on Qwerty taking nothing more serious than ICE).

Qwerty was wrapped, but WJL was still really p ......

 

A SAMPLE PACK FROM THE DEVIL'S BREWERY.

Capt Bull is into bondage and his favourite is on the left, while his photo is 2nd from right, under which it says "Kiss my Hardy".

Edited March 27 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......i jok to, which means ....................

[Captain]

4 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......i jok to, which means ....................

...... an identical sentiment to how all NESers feel about the Moderatti on this site, particularly #5, who is a definite ......

Edited March 27 by Captain

[turboplanner]

.....jok to pe, especially when he sneds you a note saying .................

[Captain]

10 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.....jok to pe, especially when he sneds you a note saying .................

..... "Waht are you diong?"

 

To which I have always replied "Dno't sned me any mroe ........

[turboplanner]

"tenos I nawt het lear ginth nad I'm yinglf to porve it because ..........."

 

[Keen NES readers will note Cappy's very clever gradual conversion from Manchurian to English.]

[Captain]

3 hours ago, turboplanner said:

"tenos I nawt het lear ginth nad I'm yinglf to porve it because ..........."

 

[Keen NES readers will note Cappy's very clever gradual conversion from Manchurian to English.]

Cappy notes that his recent long post has been removed by some drongo Moderatti Illuminatti.

 

Cappy assumes that is because of his strong assertions about which of the above is the "Master Race", his experience fighting beside Turdy up the Khyber, and his expose about the Knights of Malta, where both Cappy and Turbs are Grand Seneschals as well as both being Chief Armorers & Grand Marshals. (Little Danny Brown keeps calling both of us for details and information for his next scribblings, but we both just tell the little twerp to bugger off ... as Cappy and Turdy stick together like glue on such matters.)

 

...... I feel a strong responsibility to ......

 

Our strict Knightly code prevents us from identifying each other in the below secret photo, however it is obvious how happy and important Turbo & Cappy are. (As a little clue, neither of us are Stan Laurel).

 

 

Edited March 28 by Captain

[turboplanner]

".....stick yo the code" said Turbo, but the highly polished shoes may give away one of out most tightly kept secrets"  and he crossed the little fingers of his right hand.

Raising the right eyebrow Cappy answered hi, sternly, but it seemed like the secret would get out when..................

[Captain]

6 hours ago, turboplanner said:

".....stick yo the code" said Turbo, but the highly polished shoes may give away one of out most tightly kept secrets"  and he crossed the little fingers of his right hand.

Raising the right eyebrow Cappy answered hi, sternly, but it seemed like the secret would get out when..................

.... everyone noticed that he had taken his "sword" out and was waving it at the ......

 

Was he just flashing it (plumbingref), or did he want to give the ladies a jab (avref)?

Edited March 28 by Captain

[turboplanner]

........crowd.

In an instant the crowd realised he was not just doing what the Templars had done, which had been mimicked at Woodstock and every songfest since. This was the real thing; Turbo was holding up the sword Excalibur! (c)  Turbo had polished [oops] it many times and it glowed in the firelight like fire itself. Here was a real warrior and they knew it (not like Cappy with his cheap plastic Chinese imitation). Turbo bristled and Excalibur bristled with him, and the crowd bowed down as one.

Just then they heard the sound of..........................

 

[Captain]

.... some bloke with a page boy haircut.

 

"Hail, for I am Sir Lances-slot and I am ......

[turboplanner]

....also known at the songfests as Wuntey.

Wuntey was a folk singer and usually seen with Peter, Paul and Mary, a trio from Gummedah. 

He would fly in to the songfests in his Bushcaddy,  put the seat down, make up his bed and start singing folk songs until people told him to shut up.

He ...........

[turboplanner]

He would join anyone.

Who could forget him that year when it rained and we were all covered in mud, and the chicks had mudsliding contests. There he was covered in mud along with Peter, Paul and Mary, his guitar strings dripping with mud, singing Mary's part in the iconic "Blow'n in the Wind" because Mary had stripped off and run over to the mudslide. Most of the crowd missed it because they were at the mudslide, but Turbo taped it and you can hear Wuntey abd the boys in what many people say was the best version, on Spotify today.

When the time came to fold up the seat on the Bushcaddy it was always hard to start and sometimes it took.............................

Edited March 28 by turboplanner

[onetrack]

.........a whole 2 cans of "Start Ya Bastard" before one got to see it light up. However on this particular day, Captain went through 3 whole cans of SYB, and it still wouldn't start. It was only then he realised that........

[turboplanner]

......he'd forgotten his start checks and needed to activate the magnetos which, without thinking, he now did.

While SYB can be your friend, it can also be your worst nightmare, and now there was a belch of smoke and an explosion rivalling Krakatoa.

 

The Bushcaddy jumped off the ground and a wheel came down on Cappy's left toe pinning him behind the exhaust pipes from which was emerging a Wall of Flame; the engine caught and fanned the flames.

 

Cappy's classic WW2 sunglasses saved his eyes, but would never look smart again and his WW2 flying suit was emitting enough carbon the attract the EPA.

 

Luckily he'd though to lock the brakes on, but ........................

[turboplanner]

.......he has suffered more serious burns than we thought and is in the Brisbane Womens Hospital chatting up the nurses. Of course the Bushcaddy incident attracted the newsmedia, and some started talking about the way he ties his har back and plaits it into a pig tail. This aroused suspicion in some quarters that ..........

[Captain]

On 29/03/2024 at 4:05 PM, turboplanner said:

an explosion rivalling Krakatoa.

 

..... which Turbo had actually heard over his right shoulder as he was fighting for the East India Company and for Royal Dutch She'll, against the native inserectionists.

 

In a quirk of fate, at that instant Turbo asked the same question and muttered the same 5 words (WTFWT?) as were repeated by the mayor of Hiroshima some time later.

Edited April 3 by Captain

[Captain]

29 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

.......he has suffered more serious burns than we thought and is in the Brisbane Womens Hospital chatting up the nurses. Of course the Bushcaddy incident attracted the newsmedia, and some started talking about the way he ties his har back and plaits it into a pig tail. This aroused suspicion in some quarters that ..........

..... our much beloved Captain might actually be a "Captette".

 

While Turbo has made light of Cappy's burns in his last post, it turns out that his burns were much more severe and way more extensive than anyone first suspected, such that he had to fight the nurses off in their attempts to rub soothing coconut oil on the affected area, which was also very ........

[turboplanner]

.......tender and not up to its usual self, causing the nurses to titter behind his back. Cappy couldn't turn around and see the hand signals, and made a big mistake when he started swearing at the nurses just as Matron Doubtfire, a cousin of our favourite Wagga cop, came round the corner. She picked him up by the burned limb and ..................... 

 

 

[Captain]

..... flicked it like a stock whip, as we all do with 6 ft brown snakes.

 

As a result, ......

[turboplanner]

........Cappy screamed like a Pilliga Yowie and Doubtfire, who was on her second warning .................

 

[Captain]

41 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

........Cappy screamed like a Pilliga Yowie and Doubtfire, who was on her second warning .................

 

..... for flicking the heads off 2 big browns, but here she was now, reaching down to have another go, and Cappy sort of volunteered by .....