turboplanner Posted June 8 Share Posted June 8 ......a News story on the little-read "BoringHousewives.com" where females who would rather be males pick on anything to do with men. One of them, Cheryl Smotherer couldn't help herself when she read the story on how, in the above attack by the FA/18 on Osama Bin Laden's compound, OSB escaped in the dust and was found gambling at Lake Tahoe." Impressive enough to have a Youtube Video made about it, most people would have accepted that George Bush let OSB off for a 50 buck bribe and the MSM media just bought it. The story was partly true (and we ask readers not to repeat this); OSB was found gambling, but at the Tiger shooting village of Dahir in India, by none other than Cappy on a shooting trip. Cappy phoned Turbo, Turbo hopped across in he Challenger and they grabbed on of the Khyber Drifters, armed it, and wiped him out. The photo below shows how much more effective the KhyberDrifters are than the now-dated FA/18, and ............................................................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 8 Share Posted June 8 (edited) 11 hours ago, turboplanner said: Cappy phoned Turbo, Turbo hopped across in he Challenger and they grabbed on of the Khyber Drifters, armed it, and wiped him out. The photo below shows how much more effective the KhyberDrifters are than the now-dated FA/18, and ......... ..... this is why KhyberDrifters are now dominating the skies over Ukraine ............ although they are really just being utilized on VTAL tasks & as grenade droppers, while Zylinski waits for the next Amazon delivery of 500 DJI drones from China, at which time he intends to knock off the Amazon delivery drone too, then also flog off the KhyberDrifters so that he can buy a bigger mansion in some 2nd world country without extradition agreements. But here, dear NES rivetted readers (NESRRs), is where Turbine Bounty Hunters PLC (TBH) came into their own, as their leader was insisting on ...... In an exclusive interview in the AUF's monthly Magazine (known affectionately as the "AUF's Monthlies"), Cappy reported that OSB was actually a bit of a dick, and his breath smelt ...... plus, when Cappy turned out OSB's pockets it proved that OSB had been using loaded dice when he played Monopoly professionally in Lake Tahoe. Edited June 8 by Captain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 8 Share Posted June 8 ......seeing the evidence, which as we know from the Netflix Movies always involves having a finger of the "intended" mailed to you at breakfast time. Vloddy, as he is known to the Aussie SAS guys on the front line from many weeks of bringing back intel on their four wheelers which they use to roam Russia plucking chickens for food, was very skitterish every time a knife came out was delaying the process until the TBH guys just said "OK, for an extra $10 mil you can just give us a photo or ................................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 9 Share Posted June 9 22 hours ago, turboplanner said: ......seeing the evidence, which as we know from the Netflix Movies always involves having a finger of the "intended" mailed to you at breakfast time. Vloddy, as he is known to the Aussie SAS guys on the front line from many weeks of bringing back intel on their four wheelers which they use to roam Russia plucking chickens for food, was very skitterish every time a knife came out was delaying the process until the TBH guys just said "OK, for an extra $10 mil you can just give us a photo or ................................. ...... even better, a hologram that shows you and your lovely blonde wife ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 9 Share Posted June 9 ...standing in front of the latest pile of bricks in Russia. This Vlod agreed to because................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 9 Share Posted June 9 58 minutes ago, turboplanner said: ...standing in front of the latest pile of bricks in Russia. This Vlod agreed to because................. ..... his moto had always been "Better Vlod than Vlad" and when it came to bricks, Vlod was a ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 9 Share Posted June 9 ..........typical tradie and just slapped them anywhere, these days often several hundred metres from the correct string line. "It's an aquired art" said Vlod who also disclosed ...................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 (edited) 17 hours ago, turboplanner said: ..........typical tradie and just slapped them anywhere, these days often several hundred metres from the correct string line. "It's an aquired art" said Vlod who also disclosed ......... ..... that he had acquired a propensity to paint like Picaso, to design and to build his cathedrals like Gaudi, to run his Playboy franchise dressed like Onesie (which is High Hefner on steroids [and viagra]), and to stick his ...... Edited June 10 by Captain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 .....codes into the caves of Delphi. Tis presented ........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 (edited) 4 hours ago, turboplanner said: .....codes into the caves of Delphi. Tis presented ........ ..... a problem for both te Oracle and te Charioteer, and tat problem was tat ...... Edited June 10 by Captain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 ......the caves no longer existed; the Griks had carted half the mountainside off in old MANs to build a Casino closer to the sea. Vlod was in a quarry, turning this way and that and wondering how he was going to get his codes back when he saw in the distance, CT taking potshots at the Grik rabbits which he was onselling as sweetmeats down at the evening market. Not many people know, including CT that he has some Ukrainian blood in him, probably from Vlad the ................. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 10 Share Posted June 10 (edited) 1 hour ago, turboplanner said: Not many people know, including CT that he has some Ukrainian blood in him, probably from Vlad the .......... ..... impregnator, but Vlod denied that had ever even met CT's ...... To Cappy, Turdbro Vlad and Vlod mixed up, he has (Not that anything wrong with that there is. [NTAWWTTI]) Edited June 10 by Captain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 11 Share Posted June 11 44 minutes ago, Captain said: ..... impregnator, but Vlod denied that had ever even met CT's ...... To Cappy, Turdbro Vlad and Vlod mixed up, he has (Not that anything wrong with that there is. [NTAWWTTI]) ...tribe which was seclusive and kept to the slopes of the Great Dividing Range where they could look out over the ocean and be sure........................ To Turbo, Cappyn Not That There is Anything Wrong with Him [NTTIAWWH] has the bull by the corns, because in the old days Vlad begat Vled and Vled begat Vlid and it was Vlid who begat Vlod after a night on the turps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 11 Share Posted June 11 57 minutes ago, turboplanner said: because in the old days Vlad begat Vled and Vled begat Vlid and it was Vlid who begat Vlod after a night on the turps. MODERATOR 7 ..... TURBO IS ON ANOTHER FINAL WARNING WITH HIS DESPICABLE USE OF THE TERM "BEGAT" IN HIS ABOVE POST ..... BECAUSE EVERYONE KNOWS THAT TO BEGAT MEANS TO PUT THINGS INSIDE OTHER THINGS, WHICH IS TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE ON THIS FORUM ......BECAUSE ALL OF THE MODERATTI SPEND SO MUCH TIME MODERATING THAT WE HAVEN'T HAD THE CHANCE TO BEGAT FOR QUITE SOME TIME. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 11 Share Posted June 11 14 hours ago, Captain said: WE HAVEN'T HAD THE CHANCE TO BEGAT FOR QUITE SOME TIME. OR EVEN TO PRACTICE A BIT OF BEGATING. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 11 Share Posted June 11 .........anything. In fact some were even begatted. Against this bleak background, while OT was away moving the recovered Nazi treasures to his secret lair out in the WA sandhills, and bull was in charge of a whaling ship, standing on the bow like Moby Dick, Cappy and Turbo had been invited to the 2024 Khyber Pass Reuinion. Both had bought new orange Turbans for the occasion and Cappy was making a claim that his arrived unassembled. "All I got was a roll of satin ribbon" he complained. The response from Delhu was immediate; "I am colling you fom the deli" Cappy heard, but .................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 On 11/06/2024 at 12:42 PM, turboplanner said: .........anything. In fact some were even begatted. Against this bleak background, while OT was away moving the recovered Nazi treasures to his secret lair out in the WA sandhills, and bull was in charge of a whaling ship, standing on the bow like Moby Dick, Cappy and Turbo had been invited to the 2024 Khyber Pass Reuinion. Both had bought new orange Turbans for the occasion and Cappy was making a claim that his arrived unassembled. "All I got was a roll of satin ribbon" he complained. The response from Delhu was immediate; "I am colling you fom the deli" Cappy heard, but .................... ...... he didn't want any devon/fritz today, so he hung up. The Khyber reunion was a massive success with Tubb and the Skipper as the stars, as usual. Meanwhile Cappy questioned Turbo for calling bull as a bit of a Dick, and surely he meant to say Captain Ahab, because to fit a whale up on the bow is a bit of an issue. The Nazi paintings of which Onesie is so proud, went down a treat in the Southern Cross Institute building where he ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 .....had set up a wreckers yard under the guise of preserving Southern Cross history. Just what a Jail Bar Ford diff has to do with the history of Southern Cross, or for that matter the Shire of Yilgarn, would be a question that dogged residents for years. OT had struck up a relationship with the local SC Flogger, a distant cousin of Wagga's Constable Doubtfire, and ............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 13 Share Posted June 13 (edited) 4 hours ago, turboplanner said: OT had struck up a relationship with the local SC Flogger, a distant cousin of Wagga's Constable Doubtfire, and ............ ..... they hatched a cunning stunt. "You be Boss Hog and I'll be Daisy Duke" said Onesie, before he ...... Edited June 13 by Captain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 ......went back to polishing the rocker covers of a 22 litre Cat motor from a Scraper. He adjusted his skirt and continued “...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 10 hours ago, turboplanner said: ......went back to polishing the rocker covers of a 22 litre Cat motor from a Scraper. He adjusted his skirt and continued “...... .... And are you aware of the fascinating mix of elements of which the Cat rocker cover is composed? This mix makes a Cummins rc look like a ....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 ......Chinese MG after a few valve jobs. "That's why I bought a Jag" replied Cappy "there's nothing like a real British luxury car." OT looked at Cappy, but couldn't bring himself to say anything but there was a tickle in his stomach which went to his throat, and couldn't be suppressed. "What!?" snapped Cappy, becoming suspicious and .................... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 14 Share Posted June 14 3 hours ago, turboplanner said: ......Chinese MG after a few valve jobs. "That's why I bought a Jag" replied Cappy "there's nothing like a real British luxury car." OT looked at Cappy, but couldn't bring himself to say anything but there was a tickle in his stomach which went to his throat, and couldn't be suppressed. "What!?" snapped Cappy, becoming suspicious and ....... ...... then added "Surely OT, my good & loyal friend, (mate-in-aviation even), you don't believe nor propagate those myths about jag cracked & warped heads, do you? ..........(the cracks actually propagate too, BTW)?" "NO" yelled OEHOR, with emphasis, "I actually believe that ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
turboplanner Posted June 15 Share Posted June 15 ".........we can put that behind us now. The Tata Jaguar is giving the Bentley some real curry these days, and those problems are thing of the past, not that there were any problems with the British product.." OEHOR had been carefully polishing a part with "Brasso" as he spoke and was now wrapping it in paper for transfer to his new museum. "Why would you be publishing an FX Holden hub cap?" asked Cappy, "you can drive along any country road and collect millions of them." A tear came to Oehor's eye and he replied "........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Posted June 15 Share Posted June 15 4 hours ago, turboplanner said: "Why would you be publishing an FX Holden hub cap?" asked Cappy, "you can drive along any country road and collect millions of them." A tear came to Oehor's eye and he replied "......... ..... I am convinced that it will generate greater returns, and it is simpler, if I publish each and every Humpy hubcap, rather than just polishing them. Many people don't realise that every one of those hub caps is individually numbered and each therefore has a unique history that I think your average Skippy would be very interested in, particularly number 9,642, which was part of the ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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