The Never Ending Story

[turboplanner]

......The Torres Strait Islands.

Not many people know that the Papua New Guinea government shows two flags in government buildings, one of them the PNG national flag with bird of paradise and the other a rich blue with tiny light green dots representing the thousands of Torres Strait Islands.

Each Island got a budget of one million dollars from the PNG people for bets and roads and picking up rubbish and stuff.

This might come as a surprise to the thousands of Shire Councils who show a completely different flag; the rear end of a bull with his nuts represented by a star.

And of course we pay $5 million per island just so they don't start dreaming up old massacres and their kids being stolen.

Turbo once spoke to a group on one of the islands when he was doing one of his around Australia outboard trips and old Merc seized near Mer Island "Dat Aussie Bull flag not our flag" he said, "we not Australian, they just showed it to us and asked what we like to make it and we said Bullsh!t. You funny people Australians, dumb too" and Italian suit shimmered in the cool island breeze.

 

Over on the Mainland (PNG) .......

[bull]

7 hours ago, turboplanner said:

......The Torres Strait Islands.

Not many people know that the Papua New Guinea government shows two flags in government buildings, one of them the PNG national flag with bird of paradise and the other a rich blue with tiny light green dots representing the thousands of Torres Strait Islands.

Each Island got a budget of one million dollars from the PNG people for bets and roads and picking up rubbish and stuff.

This might come as a surprise to the thousands of Shire Councils who show a completely different flag; the rear end of a bull with his nuts represented by a star.

And of course we pay $5 million per island just so they don't start dreaming up old massacres and their kids being stolen.

Turbo once spoke to a group on one of the islands when he was doing one of his around Australia outboard trips and old Merc seized near Mer Island "Dat Aussie Bull flag not our flag" he said, "we not Australian, they just showed it to us and asked what we like to make it and we said Bullsh!t. You funny people Australians, dumb too" and Italian suit shimmered in the cool island breeze.

 

Over on the Mainland (PNG) .......

.as he was speaking from Daru Island on the southern coast sw of Moresby.............they can send as much as .....

[bull]

......they want by air from Daru,said ,Bigchief poilceman you fix me with 50000 Kina cash my friend you can import or export anything you wan my man................                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            [Bull agrees here as that is how he got his full unlimited Png drivers licence back in 2004 after having a beer with the said police man in the expats bar on Daru, when he was trawling for prawns between Daru and Port Moresby but the licence only cost me 150 kina{75 Aus] 🤣

Edited Tuesday at 10:10 AM by bull

[Captain]

3 hours ago, bull said:

...... they want by air from Daru,said ,Bigchief poilceman you fix me with 50000 Kina cash my friend you can import or export anything you wan my man ......                                                             

...... and this dear NESers is a key issue for Turbine Marketing, as Cappy has taken on the task of securing the world-wide rights to market the PNG Rugby League team.

 

Therefore, given that bull has 1st hand knowledge from participation in the PNG corruption network and practices, my question to bull is how much of Albo's $600 million grant will actually be seen by the team and their management and how much will Turbine Marketing be able to skim out of that, as well.

 

"So bull, old friend" said Crappy "given that you were embedded in the graft of the country, albeit that things have deteriorated since 2004, do you reckon that the normal 10% of aid will actually make it to the ground for TM to take their usual 50% (so still a worthwhile $30 million to keep grog on the Boardroom table at TE), or will .......

Edited Tuesday at 01:50 PM by Captain

[turboplanner]

......they want more.

bull's eyes glazed over. We know from his precise statement of "150 kina" that he had only been mixing with the Bemal St rascals, and he wondered how an upstanding skipper could get into this Rugby Team scam.

Cappy noticed the eyes and had no intention of losing good money to an over-eager crustacean squasher, so he.............

[Captain]

43 minutes ago, turboplanner said:

......they want more.

bull's eyes glazed over. We know from his precise statement of "150 kina" that he had only been mixing with the Bemal St rascals, and he wondered how an upstanding skipper could get into this Rugby Team scam.

Cappy noticed the eyes and had no intention of losing good money to an over-eager crustacean squasher, so he.............

..... decided to revert to being the good cop to Turbo's usual really quite terrible, unwashed & smelly cop.

 

"bull, maaaaaaaate" crappy said "how about we go and have a couple of coffees and a cannolis, then talk our way through png politics and corruption practices, so that we can draw out the issues and .....

 

Note The Skipper's clever use of non-capitals as he kowtows to his crustacean squasher ((c) Turdboy) friend, bull.

Edited Tuesday at 06:02 PM by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......and see about putting you on as a junior member of the team.

"How much would I get?" asked bull.

"151 kina per fight" replied Cappy.

"But why would I be fighting?" asked bull.

"Whenever we start to do a deal, the Minister sends about 20 rascals after us to steal the money back" replied Turbo.

bull realised he was getting the raw end of the bird of paradise, and decided........

[bull]

7 hours ago, Captain said:

...... and this dear NESers is a key issue for Turbine Marketing, as Cappy has taken on the task of securing the world-wide rights to market the PNG Rugby League team.

 

Therefore, given that bull has 1st hand knowledge from participation in the PNG corruption network and practices, my question to bull is how much of Albo's $600 million grant will actually be seen by the team and their management and how much will Turbine Marketing be able to skim out of that, as well.

 

"So bull, old friend" said Crappy "given that you were embedded in the graft of the country, albeit that things have deteriorated since 2004, do you reckon that the normal 10% of aid will actually make it to the ground for TM to take their usual 50% (so still a worthwhile $30 million to keep grog on the Boardroom table at TE), or will .......

......the PNG government [really just a few mates from the highlands who conned the local lowlanders that they where really high landers,,,,,,it's complicated ok] would probably pay towards the team what visibly needs to be seen .  The rest will be seen on the gold coast and brisbane casinos as well as Cairns casino,,this i also had an inside view once when Turdine industries was involved with the Holmes a Court scandal we all remember the time that the CEO old Turdy himself had been..................

[onetrack]

........smeared with allegations of match-fixing involving the Wallabies. However, Turbo as always, deflected all the allegations and claims, and came out of the affair squeaky-clean (as always), claiming it was unfair to expect him to know about all the dubious associations and underworld friendships of many hundreds of employees way below his level of interaction, and he would certainly have never approved of the.........

[turboplanner]

.....underhanded scum action of match - fixing.....and he appeared to swoon with shock. The journos were all convinced and the story was about to drop when around the corner came Ra'C with a bulging Wallabies bag and ...........

[Captain]

13 hours ago, turboplanner said:

.....underhanded scum action of match - fixing.....and he appeared to swoon with shock. The journos were all convinced and the story was about to drop when around the corner came Ra'C with a bulging Wallabies bag and ...........

...... accompanied by 5 or 6 teal (and various other shades of cian) coloured bimbos, who he used to distract from the fact that ......

Edited 23 hours ago by Captain

[turboplanner]

.......he was carrying the bag.

Without recognising the press, R a'C handed the bag to Turbo and said "Thenks auld chap, you did a great job fixing thet much."

You would think that after that, Turbo's career would have been finished, his empire crashed, whole populations sinking into recessions.

 

But the Press hadn't noticed the bag or the conversation, or for that matter R a'C who'd just sauntered off.

 

The teals did exactly what their job entailed, (a) Not being worried about the subject matter, or even understanding it, and (b) completely missing the point.

 

The Press had fallen for it and no one saw Turbo quietly step into the Hummer and drive away.

 

When Albo was told about it, he .............