Golfing hit man.

[planedriver]

A couple of long-haul pilots were in between trips and decided to meet up for a round of golf.

 

They were just about to tee off at the first hole, when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

 

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome."

 

So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.

 

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

 

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.

 

"You're joking!" was the response.

 

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight.

 

"Here are my tools."

 

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

 

So he picked up the rifle and looked through the rifle sight in the direction of his house.

 

"Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window."

 

"Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha, ha, I can see she's naked!!------- Wait a minute, that's my neighbour in there with her..... He's naked, too!!!"

 

He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

 

"I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."

 

"Can you do two for me now?"

 

 

 

"Sure, what do you want?"

 

 

 

"First, shoot my wife down below, she's always been cold towards me when I get back from a trip, and now I know why"

 

 

 

"Then the neighbour, he's a friend of mine, so just shoot his old fellah off to teach him a lesson."

 

 

 

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.

 

 

 

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

 

 

 

"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think i'll be able to save you a grand here...":big_grin:

 

 

 

 

 

[Guest Maj Millard]

Clean !!!!......................

 

 

[planedriver]

Clean !!!!......................

We get carried away sometimes, but have to try and remember ladies are also present

 

 

[slartibartfast]

Absolutely right - but this one slides through on sheer funniness. I actually LOL'd.

 

 

[DarkSarcasm]

If it helps, I laughed

 

Always better to get an economical hitman...

 

 

[Guest Maj Millard]

Don't get me wrong...I ment clean shooting !!......................................................