The Meaty Bites Diet

[skeptic36]

 

I've got 2 dogs. I bought a large bag of Meaty Bites at Coles and was standing in line at the check-out.

 

 

 

A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

 

 

 

On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting The Meaty Bites Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kgs before I woke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IV's in both arms.

 

 

 

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Meaty Bites and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.

 

 

 

I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.

 

 

 

Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned by the food.

 

I told her no, it was because I'd been sitting in the middle of the road licking my and a car hit me.

 

 

 

 

 

[Thx1137]

Why is "ice cream" offensive?

 

:-)

 

 

[Guest mike_perth]

I wondered when a mod would get onto that!

 

 

[Tracktop]

OK I hadn't heard it before and did like it so

 

but am told some other versions are

 

looses weight because always being chased by dogs after what is in his pockets

 

or ends in hospital after being mauled by dogs after the meaty bites

 

and yer why censor ice cream ? :)

 

 

[slartibartfast]

Because I can't reach mine (ice-cream).

 

 

[ahlocks]

Do you know why dogs lick their ice cream?

 

 

[turboplanner]

Do you know why dogs lick their ice cream?

The ones that do it are allergic to .......

 

 

[ahlocks]

sleep.....'cuz it's the only reasonable explanation for it at this time of day...

 

 

[Admin]

When my ice-cream is melted it is on the floor ;)

 

 

[ahlocks]

Not sure what concerns me more.

 

Ian's ice cream melting, or that it's on the floor! :uhoh2:

 

P.S. Re, the dogs - It's 'cuz they can't make a fist.

 

 

[Thx1137]

When my ice-cream is melted it is on the floor ;)

hahaha. That reminds me of the Rolf Harris Peg Leg Jack sketch!