The next pandemic

[planedriver]

I went to a dinner party last night, where I and other guests enjoyed copious amounts of alcohol. I awoke this morning not feeling well, with what could be described as flu-like symptoms; headache, nausea,:yuk: chills, sore eyes, etc.

 

From the results of some initial testing, I have unfortunately tested positive for what experts are now calling *Wine Flu*.

 

This debilitating condition is very serious - and it appears this is not an isolated case.

 

Reports are flooding in from all around the country of others diagnosed with Wine Flu.

 

To anyone that starts to exhibit the aforementioned tell-tale signs, experts are recommending a cup of tea and a bit of a lie down. However, should your condition worsen, you should immediately hire a DVD and take some Nurofen (Nurofen seems to be the only drug available that has been proven to help combat this unusual type of flu).

 

Others are reporting an English breakfast fry-up or a McDonald's Happy Meal can also help in some cases. If not, then further application of the original liquid, in similar quantities to the original dose, has been shown to do the trick.

 

Wine Flu does not need to be life threatening and, if treated early, can be eradicated within a 24-48 hour period. *

 

*NOTE: If you find you are complaining a lot, it may be that it has mutated into Whine Flu. This is particularly common in women.

 

Sorry ladies! :DirtDOG: :black_eye: :hittinghead:

 

 

[dazza 38]

HA ha, i love it, ps-it must be similar to beer flu or spirit flu.LOL

 

 

[Guest Decca]

Hey Planey - Shuggesht you getta shecond opinion (@!Hic!@).:clown: