An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, Officer?
Officer: Madam, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your licence please?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the boot if you want to see.
The Officer: looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping a half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Madam, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older Woman: Is there a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the boot of your car, please.
The woman opens the boot, revealing nothing but an empty boot.
Officer 2: Is this your car, madam?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving licence.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a licence and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the licence. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you madam, one of my officers told me you didn't have a licence, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.
And the moral of this story is …….
Don't Mess With Old Ladies