planedriver

Make that 18hours, never mind, here's breaking news:

Turbostealer has been working undercover again. There’s a police headline just appeared in the forums to say a police station toilet’s been stolen. We needed another in the subrollarine.

 

Now we can convert all the relief tubes to Zulu’s.

With everyone giving that sigh of relief, the redfaced:angry:crew gave a thunderous applaud :clap:and Tubs was happy in the thought that ElCrappy the Captain would be undeterred that the thing had been knocked off.

Dikka not being an ex-submariner thought he was doing the right thing drilling 103 holes in the hull, being of the opinion that the devices were self-draining:question:.

If this should fail, being an engineer,he thought, i'll simply switch a couple of wires behind the main panel and pump the effluent out of the periscope.

However, the Captain who likes to run a tidy ship, said he'd "kick the crap out of anyone not obeying his orders".

Below are some photos from this forum's Fly-in at Cowra this weekend.Thanks for posting the photo's Geoff.

 

Looks like the weather was ideal, certainly different to Narrromine at Easter.

 

Maybe Natfly should be shifted to somewhere like Cowra around this time of year, when the weather generally is a bit more settled

 

Sorry I could'nt make it, (maybe next year), but happy to know that you guys would have had a great time.

 

Kind regards

 

Planey

Real story .... happened with famous Heart Surgeon Dr. Nitu Mandke. He had done many heart operations.

A mechanic was removing the cylinder heads from the motor of a car when he spotted the famous heart surgeon in his shop, who was standing off to the side, waiting for the service manager to come to take a look at his car.

The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hello Doctor! Please come over here for a minute."

The famous surgeon, a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic.

The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked argumentatively, "So doctor, look at this, I also open hearts, take valves out, grind 'em, put in new parts, and when I finish, this will work like a new one.

So how come you get the big money, when you and I are basically doing the same sort of work?"

The doctor leaned over and whispered to the mechanic .....

"TRY TO DO IT WHILE THE ENGINE IS STILL RUNNING".;)

Good on you JG, at least you are following your dreams and making things happen that bring you happiness:thumb_up:.

I admire that, and it has got me thinking about my own situation.

Kind regards

Planey

Wow! That was great report. I managed to get red dust up my nose just reading it.

Sounds like there's quite a few potential traps out there if you don't do your homework.

Thanks for posting it JG.

i have a electric PC9 and Texanhave heaps of diffrent parts if anyone need some stuff

He keeps asking whether i've written my Will, showing him any favours since.:ah_oh: can't thing why.

I'm the very proud owner of a Superfly, fibreglass fuse trainer, which I bought out from the UK 32yrs ago. Unfortunately I cart-wheeled it across a paddock into an unsuspecting Freesian cow who was due to give birth, and 30yrs later I have still only managed to re-cover half of the wing.

If you have a spare wing and a better driver, i'd be very grateful.

Kind regards

Planey

I'm a great believer, that the old saying "A slow job, takes a long time", may have an element of truth in it"

But being a busy man, thats progress:question:

Thank God it did'nt have the prop at the front, as it went into the crowd.

A couple of chocks would'nt have gone amiss either.

However, we can't undo whats already been done.

At least you tried batesey, you obviously could'nt do more than that.

For those of you who have to try and keep the misses happy, maybe she would allow you to have one of these.

Recreational Flying Multimedia

Regrds

Planey

Wouldn't want to do what I did to my sons RC aircraft last week (nose first) - bit expensive ! Very impressive

Hi Guys

Here is one hell of a model !

In case you're looking for another expensive model to sink your money into...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDbQ5xvsrIU&feature=player_embedded"

Regards

Planey

A husband and wife go to a counsellor after 15 years of marriage. The counsellor asks them what the problem is, and the wife goes into a tirade listing every problem they have ever had in the 15 years they've been married. She goes on and on and on.

Finally, the counsellor gets up, goes around the desk, embraces the woman, kisses her passionately, rips off her clothes and makes mad passionate love to her. Needless to say, the woman shuts up and sits quietly with a very satisfied daze.

The counsellor turns to the husband and says, "This is what your wife needs at least three times a week. Can you do that?"

The husband thinks for a moment and replies, "Well, I can get her here on Monday and Wednesday, but Fridays I go flying."

I did a return trip Syd to Melb It's well worth doing your sums first, co's this is how it went

Attendant: Welcome aboard XXXXXX Airways, sir. May I see your ticket?

Sure.

Attendant: You're in seat 12B. That will be $5, please!

What for?

Attendant: For telling you where to sit.

But I already knew where to sit, and had to pay to do so when I booked online.

Attendant: Nevertheless, we are now charging a seat locator fee of $5. It's the airline's new policy.

That's the craziest thing I ever heard. I won't pay it.

Attendant: Sir, do you want a seat on this flight, or not:question:

Yes, yes. All right, I'll pay. But the airline is going to hear about this.

Attendant: Thank you. My goodness, your carry-on bag looks rather heavy. Would you like me to stow it in the overhead compartment for you?

That would be nice of you, thanks. :thumb_up:

Attendant: No problem. Up we go, and done! That will be $10, please.

What?

Attendant: The airline now charges a $10 carry-on assistance fee.

This is extortion. I won't stand for it.

Attendant: Actually, you're right, you can't stand. You need to sit, and fasten your seat belt. We're about to push back from the gate. But, first I need that $10.

No way! :no no:

Attendant: Sir, if you don't comply, I will be forced to call the air marshal. And you really don't want me to do that.

Why not? Is he going to shoot me?

Attendant: No, but there's a $50 air-marshal hailing fee.

Oh, all right, here your bloody 10 bucks. I really can't believe this.

Attendant: Thank you for your cooperation, sir. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Yes. It's stuffy in here, and my overhead fan doesn't seem to work. Can you fix it?

Attendant: Your overhead fan is not broken, sir. Just insert two 50cent coins into the overhead coin slot for the first five minutes.

The airline is charging me for cabin air?

Attendant: Of course not, sir. Stagnant cabin air is provided free of charge. It's the circulating air that costs 2 X 50 cents.

I don't have any 50cent coins. Can you give me change of $2?

Attendant: Certainly, sir! Here you go!

But you've given me only three 50cent coins for my $2.

Attendant: Yes, there's a change-making fee of 50 cents.

For cryin' out loud. All I have left is a lousy 50cents left. What the heck can I do with this? :bad computer:

Attendant: Hang onto it sir. You might need it'll need it later for the toilet.

Go Qantas!

I did a return trip Syd to Melb with them a month ago and found some of the staff very third rate:sad:. In fairness though, they all seem to have a mutitude of tasks to perform:construction::bad computer:, initial check-in, check passengers on, check the tyres and clean the windscreen etc;

It's well worth doing the numbers though.

I've just booked to go the Melb for Christmas and by the time you've added the Tiger seat selection fee:angry:(thats a new one), credit card convenience fee, paid to upgrade the baggage allowance (per sector) to whats allowed by Qantas, plus allowing for my usual sandwich and a glass of red, there was nothing in it pricewise.

So i've booked with Qantas

For anyone with a bit of an ailment, its also a long walk to gate 58 at Sydney, and when you arrive in Melbourne its also another fair walk as they park well away from the main terminal.

That's it! cause all us young blokes are...mmm...still green, nuts, I s'pose! )

Some nuts (pistasio's for example), tend to have a green tinge), but the the best nuts tend to have have a couple of wrinkles .

.....mmm....Its a bit a bit like buying oats.

If you want good quality oats, you have to pay a fair price.

However, if you are prepared to accept oats that have already been through the horse, even if they're greener, they come a bit cheaper.

Sorry Tomo, no disrespect intended mate, I could'nt resist the temptation of what came into my wicked mind;)

Kind Regards

Planey

Welcome to the forums Crescent.Where is Kellyville Ridge please?

 

Regards, Decca.

To be serious, 5 mins from the old Schofields aerodrome.

BIG Cresent

Tell the Misses you need to get on this site to advance one's knowledge base, and communicate with a couple of nuts in the process.

In fact, if you put her on line, the boys and girls here will convince her that it's the only wise thing to do, and she might even pay for your flying

Kind Regards

Planey

I think I'd rather have a REAL E.E. Lightning! :thumb_up:

Rgds

Planey

" although I was brought up in an area where trolley buses ran and can't remember anyone being hit by one of them.

However, I had the advantage of bits of cornflake packets fixed to my bicycle forks with clothes-pegs, which flapped in the spokes to make it sound like a motorbike, so they knew where I was

Could it possibly have been the 630 trolley bus from Croydon to Mitcham by any chance:question:

Kind regards

Alan

Welcome studentbiggles and congratulations on taking your first steps to fulfil a dream.

I bet you laid in bed going over, and over your first flight. I think we all did.

If anyone asks whether you're the Riverland Girl? DENY IT IMMEDIATELY!

If you read the Never Ending Story thread, you'd soon find out why this make-believe character is so popular.

It's good fun, and the supposed-to-be grown up boys get a bit carried away sometimes.

Take care, and every good wish for your future training.

Kind Regards

Planey

Welcome to the forums Pfer.That's not PferPlaney either, Planey.

 

Regards, Decca.

Well it is English it is Electric

 

it is a Lightning

 

And I want one.......Welcome to Lightning Car Company - The UK's Premier Electric Sports Car

 

Take a look at those specs, amazing....if true

 

Sorry if this is in the wrong forum, but there you go....

What a great looking car.

With one of those you could have so much fun thumbing your nose at all in the Tuesday que, as you drive past the local Caltex.

Thanks for sharing it with us.

Rgds

Planey

Welcome P for Popsey.

You can waste lots of time here and have fun, as well as learning from others as an escape from doing chores.

Presumeably you're the guy married to M for Mumsey.

Kind regards

Planey

A flier checked into a hotel in Narromine while there for Natfly, and was feeling a bit lonely.

He thought of one of those girls you sometimes see advertised in phone booths when you're calling for a cab.

He popped into a phone booth on the Mitchel Highway, near the hotel and found an ad for a girl calling herself Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo. She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs...... well, you get the picture! He copied the phone number and returned to his hotel.

When back in the room he figures, what the hell, give her a call.

'Hello,' the woman says.:heart:

God, she sounded sexy.

'Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'd like you to come to my room and give me one..... No, wait, I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone and what I really want is sex. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. Bring implements, toys, rubber, leather, whips, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. Tie me up, cover me in chocolate syrup and whipped cream, anything you want! Now, how does that sound:question:'

She says, 'That sounds fantastic, but you need to press 1 for an outside line.'

It took three hours for him to get the courage to Checkout next morning.

I'm sure I'm really a Lesbian trapped in a mans' body.......................:killen:....

The doctor said, 'Joe, the good news is I can cure your constant headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration.

You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles.'

Joe was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He had no choice but to go under the knife. When he left the hospital, he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, but he felt like he was missing an important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he realized that he felt like a different person. He could make a new beginning and live a new life.

He saw a men's clothing store and thought, 'That's what I need.. A new suit.'

He entered the shop and told the salesman, 'I'd like a new suit.'

The elderly tailor eye d him briefly and said, 'Let's see... size 44 long.'

Joe laughed, 'That's right, how did you know?'

'Been in the business 60 years!' the tailor said.

Joe tried on the suit and it fit perfectly.

As Joe admired himself in the mirror, the salesman asked, 'How about a new shirt?'

Joe thought for a moment and then said, 'Sure.'

The salesman eyed Joe and said, 'Let's see, 34 sleeves and 16-1/2 neck.'

Joe was surprised, 'That's right, how did you know?'

'Been in the business 60 years.'

Joe tried on the shirt and it fit perfectly.

Joe walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, 'How about some new underwear?'

Joe thought for a moment and said, 'Sure.'

The salesman said, 'Let's see... size 36.

Joe laughed, 'Ah ha! I got you!I've worn a size 34 since I was 18 years old.'

The salesman shook his head, 'You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache.'

New suit - $400

New shirt - $36

New underwear - $6

Second Opinion - PRICELESS (but recommended). :hittinghead: