planedriver

Supershort stop and go by very experienced bush pilot.:thumb_up:

The back seat of an F-18

Make sure and click on all 5 excerpts.

Make sure your sound is on.

Be sure to watch all of the 'scenes,' especially 'Scene 2'.

You have to click on each photo at the left to watch the scene.

(The first one should open on its own.)

http://alt.coxnewsweb.com/ajc/swf/blueangels/blueangels.swf

Maintenance tip for owners of VW powered aircraft:angry:

Save on maintenance time= more flying time, providing you still have fingers attached.

A man suffered a serious heart attack and had open heart by-pass surgery.

He recovered from surgery to find himself in the care of nuns at a Catholic Hospital.

As he was recovering, a nun asked him questions regarding how he was going to pay for his treatment. She asked if he had health insurance.

He replied in a raspy voice, 'No health insurance.'

The nun asked if he had money in the bank.

He replied, 'No money in the bank.'

The nun asked, 'Do you have a relative who could help you?'

He said, 'I only have a spinster sister, who is a nun.'

The nun became agitated and announced loudly, 'Nuns are not spinsters! Nuns are married to God.

The patient replied, 'Then perhaps you'd be kind enough to send the bill to my brother-in-law.....':big_grin:

Despite taking the precaution of putting L Plates on the outside of the Sub to warn all around about her driving, she had still managed to hit a couple of cargo freighters, narrowly miss the sunken wreckage of that plane that was ditched off Norfolk Island, and was currently scraping along the side of NZ which was causing rivets to shoot in all directions...

damaging 156 mag rims:yikes:, but being a legal-eagle, laid a salvage claim for the sunken Westwind

Decca (The real engineer) was a little bit peed about the damage to the mags, but being a true gentleman who understands women, made allowances by not entering the mishap in his log.

It is good to see that ElCapitan has managed to drag himself away from all those dark-eyed, dusky senoritas (even if it was on his knees) and is safely home in Oz. :welcome:back safe and sound mate.

Meanwhile, Turboplanner is playing around with his new blow-off valve design, and Ahsocks is busy unpacking new (second-hand), sorry, (second foot) socks albeit with a peg on his nose, given to him out of sympathy from the Salvo's.

Tomo's gone AWOL. Hope he has a note, or there'll be trouble!

Darky who's just finished watching "A day in the life of a subrolla driving instructor" was all excited:big_grin::big_grin::big_grin:, and has booked herself in for a refresher course.

Hidey is seriously upset that the incident with the horse should have been alluded to and does suggest that he who suffers from a deficiency of socks have all his travelling aspirations be henceforth confined to the horse iron which seemed to be rusting up.

Along came Planey 3 days later with his can of WD40, as the iron horse had started to seize-up, a bit like the NES.

After spraying till the can was empty, he stopped and lit a smoke and kboom:kboom:in a bid to get a bit of attention to the situation.

"Bloody good job" said some, but he was actually hoping that there would be someone with a few .

Anyway it followed that after the air was filled with WD40, Planey was looking down from above, and noticed many of the NES Grey Brigade arthritis sufferers, starting to move a bit, despite a bit of squeaking.

Is that really someone trying to get their fingers working above the computer keyboard, he thought, or is it the sound of loose rivets:angry:

One of those one's that open when you come near it!? Yes Tomo, remote control ones. Been working with the things for around (Shh!) 50yrs now:gerg:, as the manufacturers all seem to strive in making them more complex, and less reliable.

 

Remember, like so many things--Simplicity, is generally the essence of reliability ( A bit like myself I suppose)

 

Isn't it sad when your down working and others are up flying over your head. That's gotta come close to being a crime! :big_grin:

No doubt about you Tomo, you're a bit of a nut. (I did'nt say nutter:question:)

BigPete asked a sensible question, so i'll have to ask a Fred to try and get a sensible answer.

A man owned a small farm in Aberdeenshire.The Department of Work & Pensions claimed he was not paying proper wages to his farm hands and sent an Inspector out to interview him.

"I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them," demanded the agent.

"Well," replied the farmer, "There's my farm hand who's been with me for 3 years. I pay him £ 200 a week plus free room and board, plus all main meals. There is a lady who cleans and cooks she's been here for 18 months, and I pay her £ 150 per week plus free room and board."

"Then there's the half-wit. He works about 19 hours every day and does about 95% of all the work around here.

He makes about £100 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of Scotch every Saturday night.He also sleeps with my wife occasionally."

"That's the man I want to talk to...the half-wit," says the Inspector

"That would be me then," replied the farmer

Yesterday arvo Planey was working on an automatic gate at Dural NW Sydney, when he was distracted by a sound from above.

On looking skywards as most of us frequently do, he saw a Pipstreal Virus just purring along in the blue sky heading south.

Not an everyday sight, but I can tell you that the Rotax was so quiet and it sounded just so sweet. I thought that it may possibly be a new owner of one that was advertised for sale in the current RAA Mag, taking his pride and joy home.

If my assumption was right, although it would have been very hot up there behind the perspex screen, i'd have willingly swapped places with you (lucky fellah).

Good luck whoever your were, your plane looked fantastic:thumb_up::thumb_up::thumb_up:

Kind Regards

Planey

There once was a flyer called Tomo

Who some thought was a bit of of a Commo.

He wrote wot he writ

Made himself took a twit

But he vowed to try harder tomorrow.

24hrs and no follow-up.

What are you doing to us Tomo?

Maybe we are more into flying and telling tall stories.(even if they are never ending)

Meanwhile Tubs, AhHaHa Locks, BluesBrosDarky, and the like, are no doubt planning on bombarding you with poetic justice, as retribution.

Could have been worse. A leek, or even a dry pea.

Not much more than a km away to the beginning of runway 11L at Bankstown there's a colony of resident ibis's which number in the many thousands, and surely are a potential safety risk.

At the oposite end of the runway, there is a pidgeon fancier who lets out probably 50 or so birds for a fly around:hittinghead:, which i've seen on several occasions flying so dangerously close to aircraft on their initial climb.

To allow potential risks like this in such close proximity to an airport seems crazy, and probably nothing will be done until there's an unfortunate accident.

After a visit to a massage parlour a man discovers a painful lump on his

private parts, so he goes to see his GP.

'I'm afraid this is serious,' the doctor says after examining him..

'You know how rugby players get cauliflower ear?'

'Yes,' the man replies shakily.

'Well,' the doctor continues, 'you've got a brothel sprout.':kboom:

Hey...I think my sheep are doing well here! I can keep the grass at Tullamarine, Essendon, Moorabin, Lilydale and Coldstream under control (and perhaps Pt Cook, Avalon and Toorandin too!). Tango wants one and surely Darky will take 10 or 20. Any other takers?Now...did I mention that I have some hungry cows as well.....

 

Peter

Mmmmm....... :no no:

we will have to come up with a name for it though...... using these letters - NESFW21STCAAD - representing the "Never Ending Story Fire Wood 21ST Century Artistic Aircraft Design"

 

If you build it out of Decca's wood from his paddock, you might have more than a few bugs to iron out of it

Why not call it a Bora Bora, at least sounds fast.

I'm sure he'd be only tooooooooooo willing to have an excuse to post another photo if you're not careful!?

wife ONCE AGAIN that the word is STERNUM."

Oh come on... you got to have a bit of creativity in building aircraft... the more holes the lighter it is you see... nothing a bit of fencing wire won't fix, slap a B&S (an engine, not drink!) on the front of a bit of brigalow, a few nylon fertilizer bags for wing coverings, using little bits of straight bamboo as wing spars and ribs... Dad's brother's wife's brother in law's old push bike for the wheels... and we have a b e a u t i f u l artistic piece of modern day antique engineering of the 21st century....

 

Now that is something................

Just thought you might like to build somthing different to fly:laugh:

Clean !!!!......................

Oh yeah.... bring it on...! :thumb_up: I'll volunteer as ..... eerrr? Mmmmm

Sorry Tomo,

Couldnt possibly allow that, as you live too near my ex-misses and she took 95% of what i'd earned, last time around.

I know a bloke whose clearing his land of firewood if you're that keen to get into a business. However, don't get too carried away, it's not really of good aircraft quality, despite what he may tell you.

As franchisee, you'd probably have to trade under the name of Aircraft Bruce, or something.

I like it Planey, let's not tell anyone.

Yeah but, Darky a hat can only hold so much, and Planey & I are good at sweeping red carpets, horse stables & aircraft cabins, we're sure to sweep our fortune up at Temorville.

Yea right!

With the list above, we'll either have have plenty to bank, or, spread around the tomato patch.

Anyway, tomato's are especially good for you and me Decca, so don't get the pip.

WantedIf somebody that lives around the Melbourne area has a spare sheep they would like fattened please PM me:

 

Cheers

I'll bring my spit.:thumb_up:

A couple of long-haul pilots were in between trips and decided to meet up for a round of golf.

They were just about to tee off at the first hole, when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them, "Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome."

So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.

"You're joking!" was the response.

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag, and pulling out a beautiful Martini sniper's rifle with a large telescopic sight.

"Here are my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

So he picked up the rifle and looked through the rifle sight in the direction of his house.

"Yeah, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right in the window."

"Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. Ha, ha, I can see she's naked!!------- Wait a minute, that's my neighbour in there with her..... He's naked, too!!!"

He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

"I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"

"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife down below, she's always been cold towards me when I get back from a trip, and now I know why"

"Then the neighbour, he's a friend of mine, so just shoot his old fellah off to teach him a lesson."

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think i'll be able to save you a grand here...":big_grin: