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turboplanner

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  1. turboplanner
    .....started training them to hunt. For the first six weeks no one shot anything because they'd all get out of the Drifters etc and fire off a test shot like they'd read about in the stories of Spitfires in WW2. Of course the guns rifles now are way better than the ones Doug Bader was given. Then there was a breakthrough..................
  2. turboplanner
    ....he knew they would stack the cards against him as they had done since he was fourteen when he took on the Highway Patrol and won, only to be caught by the old town cop when he had nipped in for a Maccas. He instead went for something most people wouldn't have thought of ................
  3. turboplanner
    .......Stud bulls with their Ghoolies dragging on the ground and.......
  4. turboplanner
    .......the time in the tint town of Ghooli, seven mile out the road from Southern Cross when that notorious drunk Wendal Ghooli, who was a boundary rider with a difference, he rode a camel, ran amok at the pub. Constable Jeremy Doubtfire was the local cop who pulled his trousers on, flicked he braces, hauled on the heavy uniform coat and headed for town on his horse, Cecil. He tied Cecil up at the rail outside the pub, cocked the hammer on his Colt, marched in through the front door and without any ado shot off one of Wendal's .................................................
  5. turboplanner
    Blocked fuel lines, fuel turned off, someone hung a handbag on the Mixture control, if you have a look on ATSB over the years a lot go down, usually without injuries or too much damage, most find a golf course and are trucked back to the airport. I nearly had one by turning the fuel off. The previous student hadn't turned it off and I got in and just turned the lever 1/4 on the quadrant; luckily we were still taxying when the engine quit.
  6. turboplanner
    ...a warning by the bikies and an offence by the Tasmanian Police, but since they were only armed with truncheons and Gerbil was known to fell a 300 foot Tasmanian Blue Gum in eight minutes with his axe, the TP were always focused on a lost dog or murder or something when the trash talking started around the Abscisa Aurem. On this occasion Constable OneStripe, on exchange from somewhere called WA, showed up and ........................
  7. turboplanner
    ".......any more a that and I'll show yer me teef!" (pointing to the axe which was scabbarded like a cowboy's) The comment had come from a cyclist who road his bike into town each day. He had more dents than a Kombi, and cyclists were hated by both pedestrians and car drivers, so had attitude and gave Gerbil the finger. In a fraction of second there was the brush of a scabbard a SSSSWISH and a thud at the axe embedded itself and one ear in a power pole (Stobie Pole in SA) Gerbil smoothly did a U turn and another and grabbed the axe from the pole. The ear would stay there for two years until an athletic cat got it one night. The corner would be named ........................
  8. turboplanner
    ...members of the aristocratic gentry who had been nicking pieces of bread from London Restaurants. Moorabbin of course is not on the coast which shows you just what amazing fish these Bass are. In fact they rival Carp. One time when Turbo had flow the family up to Cooper Creek near the Dig Tree and they were camped by the fire that night when a huge carp jumped out of the water and grabbed the dog by the hind leg. The family grabbed the other end and there was a tug of war with the dog starting off aa pck of Dingoes howling in sympathy. The dingoes didn't stop howling all through the night. That's how vicious carp can be. The Mongols, who had joined the Moorabbin latte set were sitting on the footpath drinking their coffee when a group of Moorabbin Molls rode up and started menacing the axemen. They decided they better get patched asap and "Bruce" did a spectacular design on a serviette. When they went to collect the patches the design read "Mongrels".Since none of them could read they just sewed them on and a new and feared bikie group started rollling through the streets of Melbourne ..........
  9. turboplanner
    .....escaped together to paradise, or at least Bicheno. From there they crossed ..........................
  10. turboplanner
    ....the South African veldte of doing exactly that to charging elephants and in fact this is where the US saying "bringing your eggs home in the trunk" originated. Bull (not bull) whose idling Harley had just started to indicate the failing tappet problem where the engine disintegrates at the most opportune moments (like when the cops were on your tail) became uncertain and giving the old Harley a lungfull of gas, turned and charged down the hill through the Tasmanian Blue Gums bowling over little Devil pups, squashing Koalas, ripping the tails off Lyre Birds, and even breaking the leg of a Thylacine mother sucking her young under the deep fern canopy which was wrecked by the ugly American attempt to compete with Vincent. Eventually there was an enormous clang and the axement knew for Bull it was "free wheel or never come out". They lit a fire and all ................................ Turbo, whose Gratax (Grammar and Syntax Analyser) never lets him down, can confirm that Cappy posts as five people here and also manages to infiltrate the script writing in all the Clint Eastwood movies, which has kept Clint going well into his 90s even though he can't always eat his breakfast by himself.
  11. turboplanner
    ......just then Cappy came round the corner in his pink Honda with the stereo blaring. Quicklysizing up the situation he casually pulled out his Holland and Holland from it's cowboy sheath, and loaded a couple of SGs and aimed at Bull's (not bull's) most prized possessions. SGs are used extensively in the sheepdog industry as "trainers"; not pay8ing attention to commands quickly leads to a whiff of SGs under the tail and he turns inside out and has not further part to play in the sheep industry. Cappy lowered the H&H slightly and .....................
  12. turboplanner
    .......huge triple barrelled 12 gauge shotgun under his arm. Just for fun, he let all three barrels go as one and took the front wheel off the Harley..........
  13. turboplanner
    ....they get Slurpies. The Head of the Tasmania chapter Bull (not THE bull but an insipid copy) went to the Deloraine Maccas and very deliberately spilt his Hot Choc Sandae all over the table and then gave a knowing look as a warning to the Manager, thirteen year old Luke. Luke quietly picked up the phone and made a few calls. Ten minutes later as Bull was still sniggering on his Harley he came round a corner to find a 300 foot Tasmanian Blue Gum lying across the road. As he wheeled the Harley around Bull saw the 6'4" Tasmanian axeman "Dougie" standing on the trunk fingering his Stihl Brute like a butcher. Bull gave him the finger and thought he soon be outa here. Two corners later he rounded the corner to find another Blue Gum across his path and this time "Grantly" who was about 8 axe handles wide at the full stretch. He wheeled the Harley around only to find ...........................
  14. turboplanner
    ......demographics of every city and every town in Australia would have to be changed, so Albo issued a million and a half letters which began, "Dear valued immigrant, we regret to advise that due to unforseen circumstances your services are no longer required, so you need to go back to Thailand within 14 days and take your stick food with you. Here's a free ticket, on Thai Airways" and signed "Your beloved Prime Minister" ....not surprisingly there was outrage in the community, not for the Thais but for the Latte set who'd just lost their evening meal, so Albo gave them coupons for Hungry Jacks. "They either use these or they'll be Hungry Jacks" he said, sniggering. Unfortunately for Albo he was caught on tape and..................
  15. turboplanner
    ........wrote a song about them. Sadly we can't print the lyrics here because of the foul Queensland guttural language but suffice to say that it involved a horse and piggery. Alert NES readers will have noticed that Cappy has used the rare Queensland measure for peanut oil, the te. No one knows what this is short for, but it's used because of the difficulty seeing through a steel vat, so the operator measures by the slurpy sound which changes as the level rises in the vat. Peanut oil of course is currently being stored by the millions of te in the old Pinkenba by Turbine Oil Ltd. Not many people know that Peanut Oil can be refined to a higher standard that 95 octane and doesn't produce any CO2, and with increasing numbers of EV owners browned of by the maintenance charges, no spare tyres and bucket handling of EVs and about to jump ship, TOL are about to launch the solution which..............................
  16. turboplanner
    ................six AUF members who said it was plagiarism and there was nothing wrong with the basic Drifter and anyway Queenslanders wouldn't ................................
  17. turboplanner
    You've been posting an RAA document. For CTA you need to go on the CASA site and search CASA documents, not RAA. The CASA documents will show you the steps you, need to take to fly in CTA. As several have said, if you want to do it just get qualified, make sure the aircraft is qualified and do it.
  18. turboplanner
    I didn't waste people's time; over the last 10 years I've explained it about three times; many took the time to follow the steps and hopefully are happily flying where they want to go. CTA is not for people who have difficulty with documents because what you are learning is critical for your safety. I've had a Cessna 210 tail fin fill my windscreen as he cruised at 90 degrees to the entry point, about 3 who were coming towards me in the Western LAL in Melbourne with no communication. We don't need more with attitude.
  19. turboplanner
    It's an RAA document, not CASA
  20. turboplanner
    Have a closer look at the document.
  21. turboplanner
    .........Vice President, Supply and we'll give him a Hyundai Pallisades company car. CT was miffed at this; He didn't miss the big Holden Statesman or the Ford LTD; he too was one of the people who screamed for cheaper cars and the Pallisades made him salivate every time he saw it on the road, which was rarely, so he ........................
  22. turboplanner
    ........telling as, like lightning he pulled a dagger from the folds of his Chinese dress (WBW was one of the few Chinese who never put on the blue overalls let alone took them off), and struck at CT's heart, but CT didn't have one (like many people from the north). This allowed just the nano-second CT needed to unleash the 222 Brno where it would do the most damage. However, he breathed in just at the wrong moment and ..............................
  23. turboplanner
    ........C.T.Barnum who had started his aviation career by swing from a rope hanging by his teeth. This paid a lot better than a new CPL trying to get into RPT, and he was soom able to afford the Quicksilver which had been in stock for four years it had a reconditioned ...................
  24. turboplanner
    ....English as he is spoken. OT had verballed .......
  25. turboplanner
    ......a weight and balance device. So when you did the “AUF Descent” pulling back on the stick in the hope that the QS wouldn’t drop, the mercury trigger shoots a stream of mercury up to the front. It ha saved....... Keep those (sic) jokes coming Cappy!
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