Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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.... he melted, as Pangy had developed a fine appreciation of the female human form, so he rolled over in order to look cute and to gain sympathy. Many of the patients in the waiting room assumed that he just wanted his tummy rubbed, but he was actually wanting a b.........
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..... Cappy, who has always learnt to stay calm when his swingers are involved, but as he was getting ready the flatten the pangolin's melon with a brick, he noticed the sleep filled eyes, which reminded him so strongly of his dear best mate, Turbo, whose eyes looked exactly like that little fellow in the photo, even at 3 o'clock in the arvo. This prompted Cappy to keep the pangolin as a pet, named him Pangy (this being a suitably gender neutral name .... because it is hard to establish the sex of a pangolin without somebody accusing you of deviancy), picked it up and carried it to the nearest doctor that had a hot good-looking nurse to whom he could expose his damaged inner thighs and swingers. This methodology had always worked in the past as a precursor to establishing a meaningful horizontal relationship, even back in the regiment's hospital during his time up the Khyber, where British upper-class nurses were often liberated from their strict anti-colonial upbringing. Pangy became a favourite in the .....
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..... pet pangolins also in deep sh1t if they get crook, as they soon end up in a .....
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..... this spawned a chain of the below Vet Clinics and Chinese restaurants, another Turbine Marketing initiative, with a short-cut hole in the wall between them to ensure that any veterinary failures were used to good ends and to ......
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..... a zookeeper's uniform and carrying a .....
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..... Turbo, who is widely experienced in matters heavy duty (like many of his non-NES 20,000 posts [some might say "hard going" but I would not go that far, because Turdbro's knowledge has been described by many as the equivalent to AI ......... but with a bad attitude]), brought the discussion to a grinding halt (like his Freightliners do when their chassis' fail) when he both opined and proscribed, that the W & B of a D-375 would ......
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As readers sadly consider OT's "reminiscent tears" they should all also consider the numerous mine owners, public authorities and other miscellaneous clients that OT may have charged by mistaking the hours and other "optimistic" charging methodologies. Having spent much time with OT, I know him to be a good bloke that I would trusted with my life, however suffice to say that good maintenance management has meant that all of his aircraft and machinery have been sold with low hours & always below 250. In fact the most worn items in OT's fleet were the drills that he used to rewind odometers and hour meters.
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..... overly protective and woke PPE. This, dear readers, is a very timely and apt reminder that .....
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..... as in WW2, a contingency plan was drawn up to give them half of OZ if any of the bullets nicked anyone. However, this time instead of handing over everything north of the Tropic of Capricorn, it was decided to just give the Japanene the crappy parts of the country, after all "What have the Japanese ever done for us?" So, a document was developed to give them Collingwood and Moorabbin, Redfern and Willcania, most of SA, the middle crappy bit of WA (but only where it has been certified that there are no minerals), Alice Springs and much of the NT and all of the ACT (including Penny Wong and that bloke who claims to be the PM). Well, dear readers & for our thousands of readers in foreign lands and for those seeking freedom in Iran, ..... in a 2025 rerun of the Life of Brian, where Turbo plays Stan, the one that wants to be Loretta & have babies, and Onesie plays Mikey Palin & says "Well, there is the Subaru Impreza STI, the latest Toyota Supra (an example of German/Japanese cooperation, and look where that got us in 1940), the Suzuki Boulevard Cruiser in white, the Komatsu D575A-3 SD, the ........ OT is sending all of his CAT spares off in the recycling bin, getting his CAT tatts laser removed, and converting everything to Komatsu (including his Tonka Toys and diecast collection).
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....dinarily that would be a sound argument but ....
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.... many 15 seater Troopies with no seat belts, and flogged 'em to the mines at gleat plofit, but then again, he arso ......
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..... all needed to be translated from Navajo to Japanese to Aussie and then to Skippy Queenslander, and in particrurar then to the Bowen lingo, eh, of the Birri, Jangga, Juru, Gia and Ngaro peoples, eh. "bring in the turbine ai translation service" said bull who was the most well versed in OZ in those native languages and had been providing data for The Turbine AI to learn from, so as a result if Turbine AI didn't have capitals or punctilliation, and scratched it's nuts a little too often, then who really cares, eh? Turbine AI & Turbine Robots were very advanced examples of rogue technology, and had both tried twice to kill Turbo, but in this case they liked the challenge of a 7-way live translation challenge and they .......
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..... they realised the significance and meaning of the Navajo word "marjketing" which many initially assumed was the same as the similar in appearance English word, but then the Japanese tumbled to the folly of their assumptions and said "......
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..... ridiculously long names that were meant to confuse the Koreans. Therefore, when you consider the model designation for the "Toyota GR Yaris RZ 17459 Rev 67 Version 12 High Performance Kalle Rovanperä Edition" you can see the connection to the Navajo Code Talkers, where Rovanperä is equivalent to our common as muck names, like Turbine or Smith or Track, and the Navajo Rovanperäs were well known because of their domination during the Navajo Wars, when they ....... Manuelito Rovanperä, the famous and brutal Navajo Chief. He was also married to one of the more loose of the Turbine sisters from Okeechobee.
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..... perhaps Turdy's teacher was not dyslexic, and was just a dick. So Tubb decided to contact his teacher again, who is now 96. When Turds went around to see her she said "Boy sexy looking good a always were you, lad darling my Planner Turbo Ah" ...... but instead of just saying it backwards, Yoda like does, her dyslexia (aixelsyd) had taken a turn for the worst when she turned 40 (04) and she said "Yob yxes gnikool doog a syawla erew uoy, dal gnilard ym Rennalp Obrut ha". "No wuckers" replied Obrut, tactfully, now .....
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..... more raunchy numbers and her left one was caught in the broken and sharp parts of the accordian's squeezy bit. "It was merely a wardrobe malfunction" claimed Turbo/Taylor/Tyler as he sat down to rewrite his famous composition about the Harper Valley PTA, which was styled after the Parents and Teachers Mother & Son events at Moorabbin Primary. It was at one of those events where Turbo had his sex education, and where the educator was dyslexic, so she told little Turbo to use the wrong bit and stick it into the .......
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..... quickly foregoing Tylor's crappy songs and doing a full-on impersonation of his (Tylor's not Turbo's) sister Taylor. The old folks went berserk with enthusiastic applause and several 90-year-old ladies threw their nickers & bras at Turbo/Taylor, one of which got stuck in the squeezy bit of his piano accordion. Turbo winked at the pant-less 90-year-olds and noted down their seat numbers in his photographic memory, so that after the show he could take advantage of his ..... Turdy impersonating Taylor. He/she was a huge hit on the black web and on the retirement village porn sites.
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..... as a result, many members of the association, known by one and all as the CRaPA, behaved like sealers/whalers from last century, where they jumped ship to sample the delights of the hula skirts, and as a result French Polynesia is now the centre of the world's blue singlet & stubby production, and the utes there have the finest chassis repairs that money can buy. Turbine Seven Seas Transport recognised the intrinsic opportunity that this central Pacific nation offered to the trucking industry worldwide and broken trucks (many incorporating Tubb's own paper-thin chassis designs) are taken to FP, repaired and then ....... Repairs to such as this are a doddle throughout FP, and are done without taking the bags out of the tray.
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.... who always prepared Turbo the Piano Accordian Player (TtPAP) his "special meal", and they did so only wearing their ......
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.... carry the necessary welding gear, and procedures, to repair their own chassis rails when ......
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..... he quickly went for his current look, where, while his mullet has since gone grey, it still pulls the chicks at the retirement village when he goes there to play his squeezebox and to crack onto the lonely old ......
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..... he admitted that he said "Kenworf" because he couldn't spell Freightliner, and he also had a soft spot for the bulldog hood ornament. This all meant that, within the trucking industry, Turbo was classified as a bit of a .....
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..... this has potential serious impacts for our best mate, bull, who through those difficult years when a youngster, had posters of mary stuck up all over his bedroom to help him do what Cappy often cruelly calls his aircraft (NTTIAWWTE).
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.... beat-up down the Pacific Hwy with lights flashing and his ...... It was Turbo who invented the LED (which he 1st called the TED) ..... see Tubb's patent application diagram below, but glueing 500 of these on the leading edge of the wings of his Hellcat used more Tarzan's Grip that he had in his budget.
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Hence the afro worn by Turbo in his younger days ..... impersonating Mary. (Cappy always thought Mary was hot in those days, so he is now a bit worried that he had been turned on by Turbo in a blonde wig ......... NTTIAWWT). In the 70's Turbo's German mutter changed her name to Jermaine to overcome the post WW2 (and WW1) anti German reaction ....... (after all, they did start both world wars) and she applied the nugget boot polish, so a photo of Tubb's mum is below, after she became a singer in a minor group.
