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Captain

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Everything posted by Captain

  1. ..... and he formed a private army, hence the creation of "Turbine Duntroon Officer Training College" in the leased Moorabbin Masonic Lodge, where he commenced by recruiting vocal, disenchanted AUF Members, however they proved to be .....
  2. .... a 'Vette that was both gaudy yet understated, all at the one time. Turbo's tattoo issue is also well known in Vicmanistan case law as Turbo claimed exactly as reported above by OT, that the tattooist had stated specifically and contractually that the Dragon tat is a "sure fire" way to get chicks, and by that Turbs thought that the Dragon would breath fire every time a vulnerable young lady would look at it. The Judge was scathing and suggested that he'd have more luck in the back seat of a Morry Minor, let alone in the red 'Vette. Turdy considered an appeal, but ....
  3. .... stud heifers with a longing look on their faces, a look that Turbs has seen many times over the years when he would make his entrance into the occasional B&S ball, where his would be the equivalent of dragging on the ground, and the ladies would be .....
  4. ..... WA Community Service Award medals, for while those awards are pretty easy to get because WA always lacks nominations, Turbs has reported Wendal's transgressions accurately, however between his amok runnings, he has also brought prestige, happiness & investment to the town bearing his name, by ......
  5. ..... said "Just wait a mo chaps as I have just flown (avref) in, directly from Southern Cross, and need to shake the sand out of my jocks, so he dropped them there and then. Now, who can I beat the living daylights out of and where's my 1st kickback?" [When he dropped his dacks they noticed his WA police issue 1930s Walther chambered in .22 short, that had been ditched by the Tazzy coppers last time, when those projectiles bounced off Chopper Reid.] The Tazzy coppers all laughed, looked at each other, then handed over a debit card which gave him access via the dark Web to the Walloper's Kickback Account at the branch of the Turbine Bank in the Cayman Islands. "Ah" said the WA copper with gusto "Kickbacks and legal violence. Geez life is good" but then he added a strange comment about ......
  6. ...... Abscisa Aurem and would be revered by the peddling community with an annual memorial service for the unnamed cyclist's appendage. A few cat lovers also turned up. Gerbil used to attend the service every now and again and chuck his axe at the pole again with a rubber ear glued to it. That was called ......
  7. ..... with passersby yelling in support things like "Woof, Woof, Woof", and "Get Behind, F^#k ya". Most of the Mongrels had trouble hearing the crowd over the big-end knock and piston slap of their Shovel Heads, but Bruce (now going by his ruff and tuff 1%er name of Gerbil), on his Honda 50 (Stepthru), got the message and replied ......
  8. ..... "Some Strait", as this was back before the 1st Bass were ever caught off Devonport, and they settled in Moorabbin which, like Collingwood, was full of escaped convicts and other ..... It is now well understood that bass, from all over the USA and all states of Australia, gather annually off Devonport to have the equivalent of a schooly's week and then to mate.
  9. ...... decided to add in a Smoking Ceremony + a Welcome to Tazzy just so that any other Mongols wouldn't feel left out, as Tasmania is all about inclusivity and making up for the horrors of the original Port Arthur, where Bull's (theirs not ours) great grandfather met his great grandmother in the exercise yard and they .....
  10. ..... said "Do we have a problem, punk?" (Attitudinarily, Cappy is the nearest thing that the AUF has to Harry (Harold Francis) Callahan, and he looks the spit of a young Clint Eastwood). "My H&H may be just a pommy made hammer gun with converging barrels, but it will blow those danglers of yours to kingdom come, and it has a history in ..... Is that Cappy or is that Clint? They always ask and nobody has ever been able to tell them apart. Nobody has ever even seen them in the same room at the same time, so perhaps this really is Clint masquerading in Wreck Flying (avref) and in the NES as Cappy.
  11. ..... which is not easy to do as they are often rusted on. Bull (not our bull) reloaded with #4s and .....
  12. ..... saying various things of which the below are merely a sample: That's not the real bull, so who cares. Various quotes from the movie "Full Metal Jacket". One brave soul told Bull to "Jack it". And 2 people observed that where the Mongul jacket had worn through the patch, it showed a Hells Angels patch below .... "He's a HA plant" they all yelled, being fully aware of the frictions in the district based on 1 percenter territorial aspirations. Bruce minced over to the distraught Bull (not our best mate bull, who defiled the hospital canteen lady) and kicked him between his .......
  13. NTTIAWWT.
  14. ..... Bruce, a 60 kgs wood chipping protester and "friend" of Bob Brown, who was riding a Honda 50, had tie dyed clothes, dreadlocks, a skin disorder, an interest in Airfix model planes (avref) and a ......
  15. ..... as a result, Maccas sent a 6 page letter which basically said "What about us?" then added words to the effect of "Forthwith and henceforth, unless we are included in this Aussie "Burger-gate" we will advise the CFMEU and the Monguls that they'll get no more kickback scorching Apple Pies, nor will .....
  16. ...... is a great initiative, and being pushed hard by Turbine Cheap Crappy Chinese EVs & IC engines PLC (the Blue Chip stock with the catchy sticker code of TCCCEVICEPLC) However these Chinese vehicles are all lactose intolerant, and peanut oil gives them the runs ..... sometimes both simultaneously, so these cars all need a recharge or a refuel every time they get a wiff of sate outside a Thai restaurant or if they see a lactating cow. So the use of peanut oil, even to lubricate bearings and seals, let alone as fuel, meant that the ....
  17. ...... on a winner, living in a world of constant and actual live nostalgia (Jesse Owens will be running in the Brisbane Olympics). The depth of what has subsequently been defined as "nostalgitis", was when the Qld AUF legislated that all engines are required to be fitted, or immediately retrofitted under an Qld generated AN, with drip lubricated external valve springs, and that additional points would be awarded if those springs were of the clothes peg type. The lack of castor oil, as defined correctly by the singularoute, became a major problem, however when the Bjelke Peterson family donated 5 te of peanut oil, the Qld AUF ........
  18. .... understand Crappy's poor attempt at automotive humour, as the 1948 FX with the early grey motor is still a current model up there, just like the Auster and the Chipmunk have recently been released at Archerfield, to rave reviews. The Qld AUF members were also still wearing suits & ties with leather helmets whenever they flew, plus ......
  19. ..... but, as usual CT went 2 or 3 steps too far. It was fair enough that he widened the body to take the Pallisade dash, then he lengthened it to accept the Pallisade's tailshaft, but his biggest mistake was to enlarge the centre of the grill to take the Pallisade's radiator. See below photos. The 1st injunction was lobbed by GMH, and then from ..... The original Morry before modification. CT's Morry after the Pallisade bits were incorporated and he modified the grill.
  20. ..... an EPA Sampling Station. "If I can analyze that pong, I reckon that there is a quid in reconstituting it" said Turdy, who knows such things. "I'll then Dutch auction it to Russia or Ukraine in commercial quantities at wartime prices, after which Turbine Stink Factory & WMD will be the next Blackrock. Then Wun Bung Wing will be ....
  21. ..... BLUE Head after it had cold seized when kicked over at the end of the production line in the factory. CT & Wun Bung Wing became friends and this heralded a period of enhanced US/Chinese relationship, until CT was getting stuck into the Coors Light on night, and asked WBW why he was so thin and did he perhaps as a child get One Bung Tit. WBW's reaction was ........
  22. ..... a comparison, eh, between King Arthur's sword Excalibur and the aboriginal aviation legend of the ......
  23. ..... numerous AUFers when they got a bit overexcited on base at Natfly, where mercury refills were sold for $10,000/lb. Turbo and OT had heard that mercury levels were high in top marine predators, so set up the new TurdzOT Marine Mercury Harvesting Company based in Ceduna, where they took advantage of the indigenous industries tax concessions because Uncle Turdy claimed 17.4375% aboriginal blood and OT added his 0.7% heritage after that sordid and taudry affair that he had with a native goddess when completing his PhD in .....
  24. ..... genuine mercury used as ..... Cappy apologises for the crappy quicksilver joke (sic). [Ahpox would have got it].
  25. ..... give a rats about this bunch of new Australians, and really just needed to get to the karzi quick stix to change his .....
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