Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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..... always worshipped his selected "higher being" ..... and then spent the arvo coating any broken sacrum and/or coccyx with plaster of paris, before bandaging it/them using his special knot that stopped the bandage from slipping off by also wrapping the bandage around the breakee's ....... THE DIAGRAM THAT bULL ALWAYS USES TO EXPLAIN WHAT HE BROKE, TO HIS VICTIMS.
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Our beloved Turbo is obviously in denial, or he has forgotten to take his tablets again (It was one of Cappy's jobs while up the Khyber, to keep Turbo's tablets flowing in the correct order. ..... Before Webster packs were invented, they were known throughout the Empire as Cappy Packs and that name was registered until Clarry Webster stole the concept). In this post he has deflected from the fact that he is the centerpiece in this photo and is doing an impersonation of Jabba the Hutt standing at a lectern.
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Further Response to Explanation: There is a lot to be said for hollow logs during a drought, ...... and the "daisy pot thing" is quite new & experimental. Cappy should not be pre-judged just on these.
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..... liked the idea of being a Commissar, carrying a whip and having a red hot poker with which to .....
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Explanation - Cappy has always been Turbo's best mate, (not that he has too many others outside of the NES, as Turbo burns a lot of relationship bridges once he has finished using people) so when this photo was taken, Cappy is looking out for Turbo, as usual, and is dressed as the tall good-looking Storm Trooper (note the larger codpiece) behind Turdy's right shoulder.
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.... swallowed one of those blowies when many in the room stood and sang the Anthem of the World Economic Forum, including Verse 9 which includes a pledge to eat ze bugs and ze flys. The new publican was, indeed, running an undercover WEF Pub ................. so bugger all acknowledgement of Aussie Day. It was at that very moment that Klaus Slob walked into the room as the trumpets played his favourite ditty and a hush came over the joint, until a little boy said "Geez that looks like Turbo, as I saw on a gay website that he had one of those suits made a while ago". As if that news wasn't enough, when the below photo was forensically examined by the OT Security Company (the premier private forensics laboratory in OZ) it exposed the background that is evident in the 2nd & 3rd photos below, and the ......
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.... and quickly moved on to incorporate a new version of Lady Turbinia's Lover and include fresh, vivid and lewd AI generated (so they show all the fine details) drawings in the new edition of the Kama Turbtra, for a 2 books in one deal the contents of which ....
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.... , but given bull's expansive "life experiences" (which really just means that bull was a hottie & had taken advantage of lots of ladies), it was a simple matter to .....
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.... about the merits of capital letters and the use of french .....
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.... with a thumbs down emoji, although they didn’t exist at the time, so he used his box brownie to take a photo of bull giving a thumbs-down after have a skinfull, a bad keg, and getting a knockback at the Rissole. bull's thumb therefore became famous Aussie wide once the newspaper became syndicated and bull was .....
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..... formed the Cook Squid and Octopus Harvesting Company which was, ostensibly, just active to give them a quick squeeze once caught, harvest the ink, and chuck them back with no harm done, except for the animals wondering "WTF was that?". The ink was ultimately processed and marketed by the Cook Octopus and Squid Company (the initial COSCO before it became a worldwide phenomenon under Cappy's leadership). However it was soon realised that most of the cash was in the bits that were being chucked, so at midnight each evening a black painted stealth hydrofoil high speed vessel would arrive and transfer the fleshy bits so that only ink tanks were visible when the Inspectors arrived. This is when bull and Cappy first met as bull was the sneaky skipper (SS), and this suited him so well, as he hid his black boat in the mangroves around Bone & unloaded it into a fleet of Freightliners during the morning, got paralytic at the Bone Rissole in the arvo, and then came ......
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..... because the "Great Ink Scandal" of '85 (or the GIS as it became known in Cappy's legal circles) was still front of mind, and this had caused a .....
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.... OT responded with a brief reference to the Turbine Corporation and his mate Turdo/Jeffrey. Gina went quiet and a bit moribund, and that .....
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.... Gina became keen to perform the ping-pong trick (as a propellor, not a catcher) and that brought .....
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.... all of the eateries in Bunnings stores are called the Lang Walker Memorial Coffee Shop, with liberal amounts of low-grade iron ore and WA sand sprinkled about the joint for authenticity (the low-grade iron ore is supplied by Gina under a concessional pricing contract that is administered by OT, in exchange for a CAT spare parts concession at most of her mines). This arrangement has suited both .....
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Investigation Post ..... Crappy has a nose for shifty behaviour and he notices the silence, with no response from Turbo for almost a day. Therefore could Turbo actually be Jeffrey Epstein, living in-cognito in Moorabbin, after having the real Turbo substituted in his cell (my compatriate best mate Turbo always did have a strange shaped bone protruding in his neck)? If true, this might go some way to explaining this Turbo's extreme wealth (which stands out a little in downtown Moorabbin), his ownership of a Caribbean Island and the fact that Turbinia introduces this Turbo (not OUR Turbo) to lots of young ladies. This Turbo is indeed, a quandary, wrapped in an enigma and if any NESers have more data on whether he is actually Jeff, please advise, as this Turbo is subtly different to my best mate with whom I spent considerable time Up The Khyber, where we shared a foxhole (but not a live fox, I hasten to add). Perhaps we should bend "this Turbo" over and check for Cappy's bullet hole next to his bullseye. All comments and data most welcome as Cappy has confessed previously, he always found Gislaine Maxwell to be a super good sort and if he is Jeff, perhaps this Turbo can give me an intro & visiting rights.
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.... Onesie is caught droning on and on (and on and on). .... hence OT's regular silences on the NES when he was actually aboard the Lolita Express (avref), so he and Bill are like .....
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Not to mention the numerous AK47 magazines.
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.... perhaps one of the numerous poxes for which, Bill Gates and Jeffrey Epstein had developed a range of .....
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.... that "The Prez has foregone his stinky Sharia compliant Afghan warlord clothes to try to look the sartorial spit of Albo on a cuntry junket (Known in Cantberra as a CJ, and when that photo op is in Alice Springs it is called an ArSendCJ). They subsequently ran the below photo with a byline that said "From Warlord to Wanka", then ...... The file photo from a normal Toke Council Meeting that was used above the byline. That's the Shire Prez down front .... but still with RMW boots, belt and moleskins worn out of shot. (The Prez also has a thank you note from Twiggy and his missus expressing appreciation for buying so much RMW clobber).
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..... get his band going, as once he announced the full band name as Yopuyindi from Quirindi, he received an injunction from Yothu Yindi and an accusation of cultural misappropriation. The fact that the members of Yopuyindi were a mix of South Africans & Irish (typical majority WA bloodlines), and sang little ditties such as Irish Jigs + Afrikaans Supremacy Songs (ASSs), appeared to make no difference, so when the matter went before the Tocumwal Sharia Court it was found to be ......
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.... because he always assumed the honourable best of people & their motives, however he had obviously never been subjected to the OT Influencer's coven that was .....
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..... been the brother of that great jockey, Willie "The Shoe" Shoemaker, hence why when Mavis and Onesie had their singular liaison that earnt OEHOR his name, Mavis was heard to yell "Ride 'em Cowboy" and "Go, you good thing". OT had built a substantial business (6 times he has won the "WA Business of the Year" award) from meagre beginnings in the Southern Cross Cobbler's Emporium, and as a result he .....
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...... and on ..... and on ..... and on ..... about OT's issues, and then disclosed his ......
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..... although some AUF members did, when they saw the designs. .... to fruition, because Turbo, the brilliant & glorious Musk-like free thinking maverick, had ignored convention in his designs and had gone for Speed, Speed, Speed and more Speed. This was enabled by the wonderful (but still rattley) Rotax 916iS/c, which could be cranked up to 210 hp by substituting a "Turbo 12" Turbocharger" (It's not really 12", but Turbo just named it after himself) and 200 knots VNE + Citation stall speeds, were a doddle. "Now all it will take is a little rule change" commented Turbo on each of the receipts, as the kit orders flooded in. The aircraft soon became known as the ......
