Captain
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Everything posted by Captain
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..... they formed the Yarrawonga Cartel, which was structured in an identical manner to the Sinaloa Cartel, but is more vicious. The Yarrawonga Cartel make their dough by controlling the trade of Rutherglen wines across the border, the transport of counterfeit Tic Tacs to the northern states, and the people smuggling of decrepit, sad, penniless, poorly fed, smelly, desperate Mextorians across the border into the freedom and prosperity of NSW. (Cappy is pleased to report that this is usually a fairly safe trip and none are sexually molested because they smell "off" and look crook, like Mextorians, although most do take the opportunity to be baptised in the holy waters of the Murray and become free "Northerners".) On the return trip the Cartel brings machetes, and they capture any delusional northern Labor voters who post anything about "Standing With Dan". Those people are usually surrendered by northern freedom loving Labor Branches, stripped, gagged, and bound with zip ties, to then be sold in the .....
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..... Avoca Zambrero restaurant, which is the closest he could get to Victoria without ordering his 4th Commonwealth aircraft (avref) of the day. The staff at Zambreros welcomed Albo, who had given his country Aussie straw sucking Akubra the flick, and he wore a sombrero which made him look .... He looked like this: But wearing this typical Mextorian gear.
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..... summoned Zali to his office and said "I'm going to build a man made Winter Olympics standard ski slope at my seaside Avoca mansion, so when I leave the 1st jump ready to do a double backflip (policyrecantref) do I put my weight forward or on the back of my skis?" Zali's response was surprising as she offered the following without exchanging texts with Adam Bandt or with little Robby HACkySack, and said "Dutto (PDref) reckons that you have been ahead of your skis for over 2 years, Anthony, my little buddy, so just lean back but don't ever go to the right (leftypoliticsref), & once you leave the ground (pseudoavref) just ......
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...... accompanied by 5 or 6 teal (and various other shades of cian) coloured bimbos, who he used to distract from the fact that ......
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..... decided to revert to being the good cop to Turbo's usual really quite terrible, unwashed & smelly cop. "bull, maaaaaaaate" crappy said "how about we go and have a couple of coffees and a cannolis, then talk our way through png politics and corruption practices, so that we can draw out the issues and ..... Note The Skipper's clever use of non-capitals as he kowtows to his crustacean squasher ((c) Turdboy) friend, bull.
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...... and this dear NESers is a key issue for Turbine Marketing, as Cappy has taken on the task of securing the world-wide rights to market the PNG Rugby League team. Therefore, given that bull has 1st hand knowledge from participation in the PNG corruption network and practices, my question to bull is how much of Albo's $600 million grant will actually be seen by the team and their management and how much will Turbine Marketing be able to skim out of that, as well. "So bull, old friend" said Crappy "given that you were embedded in the graft of the country, albeit that things have deteriorated since 2004, do you reckon that the normal 10% of aid will actually make it to the ground for TM to take their usual 50% (so still a worthwhile $30 million to keep grog on the Boardroom table at TE), or will .......
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.... up. The reason that they were a no show is that that had seen a culturally enriching video which showed circumcision by oyster shell (the CBOS, soon to be compulsory for all migrants on Australia Day) and they had buggered off, quick stix them fellas, back to .....
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..... Tic Toc had banned the LokLok, X had Sanctioned the LekLix and Facebook had ....
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..... think of it, with the Turbine Industries LV's power lead, the Leklicks would also be "Cable Guys" and ready to install cable TV throughout the highlands, so that the masses can watch Albo's $600 million NFL team whenever they play. An extension of this business plan was to immediately take a controlling interest in Foxtel now that the Murdocks want out. But the Leckliks also showed their can-do attitude by cutting off all but 10 ft of the power cord and suspending a 20 kVa diesel generator below each LV, and introduced the moto "Mobility is Critical to good head-hunting ...... and to capture lots of chicks." The LikLiks were therefore in deep s.....
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.... nobody knows that it is an EV because your dyslexia+ spelling difficulties meant that it has been designated as an LV (LecLick Vehicle), so we are exempt from .....
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.... the subsidies that Cappy had negotiated with Chris Bowen before Chris went dark. This amazingly well negotiated subsidy was much more than what Simon Homes & Tennis Court had achieved, was awarded a Lifetime Achievement Award by the Australian Negotiator's Council, and .....
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..... flicked the switch on a 30 minute Surroundarama video, shown on the 30 ft high X 50 ft wide curved screen, which was taken secretly at the Moorabbin Drive-in Theatre showing Turbo doing some of his best front seat, and back seat, work for which he was well known and admired around the Moorabbin social scene. In particular, the film showed a rather spotty Turbo doing his .....
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..... he had trouble getting a publisher for his tome entitled "The Bench Seat Kamasutra" in which he had the usual diagrams, however in the Deluxe Signed Edition he had photos of himself, Mavis and bull's Coffee Lady, which made that edition an immediate collector's items. This was followed of course by demands for Turbo to make public appearances (somewhat akin to the Puppetry of the Penis [another original idea of Turbine Marketing and Promotions]), so Turbo bought lots of blue and green pills (he usually doesn't need them, but with 4 or 5 shows a day and 7 days per week on a lengthy National Tour, he just wanted to be sure that little Turbo could keep up the pace) and big Turbo went on the .....
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..... it took his best mate, The Skipper, to step up & bail him out of the corner into which he had painted himself, by suggesting via intercom into his shell-like ear, that he speak about .....
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..... Turbo always fondly remembers his Control Line flying days as a kiddie in the park and he is convinced that the control line concept could be applied to his Flying Car initiatives, at least initially, until a zero-gravity battery (currently in development by Turbine ZGB in Poland) is on the market, when ...... Turdy setting his world record Control Line flight about 40 years ago. The flying Car will do something similar until the battery development work is finished.
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More proof that the Turbine Corporation are accepting of the LGBTQDOT lifestyle & practices.
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An Exclusive aside for all discreet NESers - During a sales meeting about the XT582, Turbo was at the head of the Turbine Marketing brainstorming session, and it was Turdy himself that came up with the sales slogan "Dykes on Trikes" not only for use as a nicker-less flyover promotion during the Sydney Mardi Gras, but also for cross-country flights to LGBTQDOT hamburger, or Taco, lunch meetings. It is a little-known fact that Turbo not only wanted more XT582 sales, and he didn't really ever care who put what where, however he also thought that this would be a good project for Turbinia to lead, as she was going through her "experimental" period at the time so he may as well make a quid out of it while she was on the other side of the fence.
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.... another anecdote from the Turbine library that commences with "It is little known that .....
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.... "The Difficult Transition from Aviation Luminary to Wartime Leader" and he commenced with a self aggrandising introduction which included that shocking anecdote about the time he was ......
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.... gig playing Winston Churchill if he can lose a little weight and learn to paint. Turbo immediately bought a box of cigars and gave everyone 2 fingers, but the wrong way around, and .... (Re the phone call, I just asked for OEHOR and all the girls seemed to giggle and pass me on to the next one. With regards to your sister, she didnt have to be asked twice as she sounds a bit desperate, so she is meeting me for a coffee tomorrow in the best coffee shop between Perth and Kalgoorlie, as they just received their new Nescafe machine and 5 assorted free sample pods [Which made the front page of the West Australian]. So hopefully that will get your sister going.)
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.... was totally exhausted, as was Cappy after reading that and noting the plagiarism and lack of copyright references to the struggling writer who originally knocked up the description of the charge up the VOD. "Hey OT, said Crappy when he called WA an hour ago (after waiting for the operator to twirl the handle and put the 9 plugs into the switchboard to eventually get OT's joint). "Do you reckon that Tubb may have had that post composed by a verbose AI bot?". "Don't talk to me about AI, or bot bots" replied Onesie "As we are still working out how to play pacman on my Apple green screen. However I did read the latest from TurdBoy and I think .....
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..... tiger tails hanging out of petrol tanks, then taking a pinch of snuff after tea and scones on the .....
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... had been pumping out AvGas ever since CASA had required that the tank farm at the airport be connected directly to the helipad at Parliament House and at The Lodge (so that Albo doesn't need to dick around with any common folk to get into a fueled up chopper to head to his mansion at Avoca). Once lit, the fountain had more visitors than Sinney harbor on new year's eve, and the Canberra gum'mint decided to .....
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..... , however it is little known that Johnny K was a player, generally similar to bull but not as successful, so Kerry (as he is known to his mates) asked Turbo for Monica's WhatsApp number in exchange for his 1st knighthood (Turbo is 1 of very few that have more than one such gong from the same system) and a Welcome To Canberra ceremony that involved .....
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.... to Turbo when Gough recommended him, and John Kerr was about to give Tubb his Gong at Gov House. Johnny asked Turbs "What's ya monika mate?" and Turdy replied "........
